Disclaimer: nothing you recognise belongs to me.

Slight spoilers for "The Big Bang Job" and "The San Lorenzo Job"

"Don't ask me that Parker, 'cause if you ask me I'm gonna tell you."

And yeah he would, Parker thinks. It might break him to say words he doesn't want to say, but Eliot would say them anyway. He' d make a worse grifter than she would - the only difference being that if he stabbed someone with a fork they wouldn't get up afterwards.

Both of them are good at what they do, but Parker reckons she gets the better deal. She's good at cracking safes, feeling around and listening to the click when the bolts shift true and a half tonne of reinforced steel slides free all pretty and smooth and lets her peek inside. There's a rhythm to it, a peace that security alarms going off if she gets things wrong doesn't shake. Of course she doesn't get things wrong often. She has talent, and sometimes, blessedly infrequently, she wonders if the fact that she's so right for what she does is because a lot of her is so very, very wrong.

All the wrong bits that make her up is "The elephant in the room." That's a Sophie saying, although Sophie has never said those words about her and has always looked at her as a Parker rather than just a Thief.

It's a stupid saying because if there was actually an elephant in the room Parker would say so, and can't see why anyone would pretend otherwise. You could get trampled to death for one thing, or it would get in the way, and anyway who wouldn't want to go up and pet an elephant?

But no, turns out there are no elephants (apart from that one in the private zoo she saw once, and the diamonds stolen from the owners' safe meant that she barely got a glimpse before running ), only things that are true that you aren't supposed to talk about.

Like how that time they were all in that restaurant and that couple with the little boy came in and sat down in the booth next to them and... Whatever they had been talking about just vanished. Nate had always been pretty good at hiding what he felt, but he never looked dead, like someone had stolen all the fun, confident, Nateness, out of him before. She would have stolen it back, one way or another, but Sophie had kicked her on the shin and given her a don't say anything look, and contrary to what the others believe Parker can take a hint even if she doesn't agree.

Of course Sophie herself has elephants. Apparently the things she does on stage is acting. Serious, go and watch on a movie screen, acting. And alright, she, Parker can acknowledge that she's probably not the best judge - there was that time she got thrown out of the cinema for yelling at the screen during Ocean's Eleven after all – but when Sophie's pretending to die on stage and the audience are laughing that's probably not a good thing. Afterwards Nate had that talk with her about how telling Sophie that people were laughing was a worse thing, and alright, that's a little elephant (more pig sized really) that she can keep to herself. Sophie and Nate are so good at being things that they aren't in real life that they don't notice the things that they actually are most of the time anyway.

Not like Hardison. Alec doesn't have any elephants at all, and given what he does for a living that's hard for Parker to get her head around. He can be a thousand different things when he's pixels on a computer screen, but talk to him face to face and he's so transparent that sometimes Parker wishes he had a screensaver on his face so that the bad guys can't read him as well as the team does. There was a kiss once between them but calling it an elephant doesn't seem right.

More like an Elephant Bunny. Comforting but strange. Confusing but welcome.

Eventually one of them will pick it up or look at it properly and ask questions. Perhaps it might get taken away altogether. In the meantime it sits there between them and Parker is happy enough to let it until she can work out what to do with it.

And then there's Eliot. Eliot's good at what he does too, and you don't get to be that good without doing things that are very, very wrong. You don't get to be a hitter without getting hit. You don't get to be a retrieval expert who doesn't use guns without knowing how they work, and you don't get to work without them without knowing that you don't need them.

Eliot's elephants are big, with tusks, and if Parker could see them she's pretty sure that she wouldn't want to pet them. But that doesn't mean she can't pet Eliot, or poke him at least. When the General asked if he'd leave any of the team behind he looked at her with an unspoken promise of no.

Of course he doesn't know that she heard what the General said, although she thinks he might have an idea.

But that's alright. They can share that elephant together, because she can't imagine leaving him or any of the others behind either.

Yawning, Parker shifts on the sofa and tries to focus on the football game playing on Nate's TV. Sophie had gone home a long time ago but the faint smell of her perfume still lingers and the spice is almost as good as a hug. Hardison and Nate are arguing about something to do with complex football things that she can't be bothered to try and understand, and Eliot rolls his eyes towards the two and gives her that rare smile that lights up his eyes.

Parker smiles back and snuggles down against the cushion that she has appropriated for herself. There might be elephants in the room but there were also people she liked sharing the couch with, and really, since she was sure that she wasn't going to be stamped on by any of them, that was ok with her.