The fear shot through me like a bullet. We had just gotten out of the caves but Dimitri wasn't anywhere. The last thing I remember was him being pulled to the side by the blonde strigoi

Christian and I fought at the academy, I tried to run after him but my mother pulled me out of the cave with the others. I was sure Dimitri could take him. But as soon as we were at the

academy I collapsed into my mom's arms sobbing, knowing that if he had won the fight he would be here by now. I don't know how much time passed I know I felt lifeless, like a piece of

me was missing. I remember it turning dark and falling asleep in my mom's arms and her carrying me to Lissa's room because she had the night shift, they had extra guardians working since

the attack. As she got to Lissa's room she knocked quietly on the door trying not to wake me up. Within seconds Lissa was opening the door. she gasped and ran to hug me comfortingly.

My mom murmured thank you to Lissa and left. Lissa pulled me to her bed and sat me down. Judging from the shocked look from Christian I must look as bad as I feel. Lissa sat on the bed

with me shooting a look that saidback off to Christian. Just then I remembered she didn't know about anything about me and Dimitri. I couldn't bring myself to explain it to her now so I

hugged her and started crying all over again. My Dimitri was gone. What if he was turned? Oh god I couldn't live with myself any more. I should have been there with him. I could have

saved him. As all these thoughts went through my head I just kept crying. I didn't know it was possible to cry this much. Lissa stayed there with me through it all and even Christian was

there stroking my back in a slow, rhythmic, and actually calming way. When my sobs turned into sniffles I pulled back and gave them a small smile.

"Rose, what happened out there?" Christian blurted then Lissa shot him a scolding look.

I took a deep ragged breath and looked down at mo hands that were in my lap.

"If you guys really want to know what's going on I'm going to have to tell you a very long story. But even after the story you guys might be pissed at me, and I wouldn't blame either of

you." I looked up at them expecting them to let it go but neither one of them showed any signs of moving. So I told them everything from the lust charm victor cast on us to the cabin

then ending in the caves. By the end I was forcing back the waterfall that was threatening to burst behind my eyes. I was expecting an explosion of anger from Lissa but instead she was

the one that started to cry and asking forgiveness from me. I looked at Christian hoping he would know what was wrong with Lissa but he looked just as shocked as I did.

"Liss what's wrong? Are you okay?" I said

"Please don't be mad at me." I begged

She looked at me shocked. "Me mad at you? Rose I'm so sorry this is my entire fault if I hadn't been so wrapped up with my problems I would have noticed something different. I didn't have time to help you with you with your problems or even to listen to them"-

"Liss you don't"- I cut her off but she covered my mouth with her hand and started again.

"Rose, I know I have been a horrible friend can you forgive me?" she gave me a pleading look, and let her hand fall from my mouth. I jumped up and hugged her and we both cried together.

When we were done crying I pulled back and gave her a thankful look. But now that I had that out of the way there was nothing that could distract me from thinking that Dimitri could be

in that cave dying right now. I couldn't just sit here and do nothing and wait for the rescue team to go in the morning I had to go now. I looked up at Christian and Lissa, face set in stone.

"I'm going to the caves I need to find him. Tonight." I stated and I saw their mouths drop.

so is it okay should i add on?