*To
Stand Alone*
A Legend of Dragoon Fanfiction -- Chapter 1
Written by Rap's (RaptorJNB@aol.com)
-------- *revised 7/24/01* --------
Notes (Some new for the revision)
: Okay... I wrote this Fanfiction because I felt, for some odd reason,
I needed to explore Rose's character. Let's face it- she kicks serious
ass... but I know that to lead a life such as she has- your going
to have some issues. I dunno what this fic should be.. a power for
living kind of thing? A realize your not alone kind of thing? Either
away- I think the theme should be clear by the end- and even then
if you end up confused; that's okay. In an odd way, it works with
the story.
Let me also say, that of all my fanfictions, I would really appreciate
feedback for this one. It was, as odd as this may seem, incredibly
hard to write. I'm dealing with Rose- a strong, able, but harsh
woman... and Albert- who is far kinder and more understanding. Making
their personalities conflict in a way that is both believable and
not entirely out of bounds was a hell of a thing to try... and let
me comment further in this area...
Rose is whom the fic centers around. Albert- is my medium. The one
who carries the plot. Why him? Why not any of the others? It was,
seriously, a process of elimination. My first choice was Dart- but
I didn't want the *Zeig Factor* a part of this fic. My second thought
was Haschel... but then- I'm not going for that *elder to elder*
type of thing either. I considered Meru as well... but then your
talking about a HUGE personality crunch.. And it were just to hard.
Shana I simply did not want to do. And.. Really now... Kongol? Miranda?
hell no. Albert's personality conflicts with Rose's own in *just*
the right fashion. Still, even with the chars picked, I know I have
to make Rose seem a little vulnerable. Hell- both of them have to
seem that way... AHAHHHHHHH!!!!! gawd.. It's crazy!!!
oh yeah- Marius is of my creation! He's not in the game or anything!
Lastly, and I mention this due to a previous comment a friend made
(She picked it up right in the middle of the story...) DO NOT THINK
I am AT ALL trying to pair these two up, okay? Yes everyone- a male
CAN express concern for a female without it leading to romantic
involvement- and vise versa. Albert and Rose would be like.. I dunno-
Kongol and Shana!? So please drain yourselves of that notion or
I will be forced to hit you with a pool floaty! Besides- everyone
knows that Rose and Lloyd are the perfect couple- and Albert belongs
to me. *Cough* or.. er... Emily.
*coughs* Now, seeing as how I have just revised this story
(it had some MAJOR mistakes...) I gotta comment on the above a moment.
Eh heh. Most people here in the LOD community now know that Rose
and Albert have become my favorite couple after Rose/Lloyd. It honestly
happened... sometime after writing this fic. *_* So kick me if you'd
like... but I can't help it. I only mention this because, as many
people now DO know I support those too- I still DONT want you to
view this story as any sort of romance. That is NOT what it is meant
to be, okay? Friendship people. FRIENDSHIP!!!!! Due to more then
a few wondering emails, I decided to try and clarify the nature
of Rose and Albert's relationship in this fic right here. Kay? Kay!
^_^
***
And I don't want the world to see me.
Cause' I don't think that they'll understand...
When everything's made to be broken;
I just want you to know who I am.
-Iris
Goo Goo dolls
------
Dedicated to Rose- because she's a kick ass character that has only
one weakness- herself.
And also dedicated in part to Aria- because like it or not girl-
I'm always gonna' be there for you.
------
Wearily, her eyes followed the steady dribble of crimson that crept
slowly across her pale- moon touched flesh. Like wax, the blood
flowed downwards. Gravity lulled it further, and then a smooth droplet
that had begun to build spilt quietly over her palm and fell silent
to the floor. Rose wondered, briefly, if this could be considered
morbid. To watch one's own blood fall carelessly over the deck below
her feet like red petal tears.
Then again, she wouldn't have cared much anyway.
Being towards midnight, all was quiet save for the hammering steel
pistons that echoed from the bowels of the Queen Fury. Beneath her
feet- planted firmly into the oak and steel of the crows nest- she
could feel it's power driving the ship onwards. Steering it easily
through the pitch black waters that surrounded her. The night was
an even darker thing. Looming, ominous, and unexplored. Only the
floodlights on deck would dare to cut through it's cold veil.
Even then, the glow was minimal, faint, and sickly.
Rose turned her hand over once or twice, ignoring the wind that
lifted and danced with a length of raven colored hair. The slight
scratch that had entranced her before continued to let blood seep
into the left cuff of her attire, but now she paid it no mind. Nights
like these, high above the sleeping populants of a ship destined
to an unknown future... it was easy for one such as she to let even
the most bold of thoughts slip away. The cold night air blew harshly
against her face, but it was a welcome difference from the sweltering
heat of battle that was her life and quest. Rose could even learn
to need it; This formidable solitude. Away from the dragoons, her
past, and the imminent future.
Past...
And The word was such a stupid thing. Said so easily despite all
it could mean and hold. As if to whisper "War." When with
war you must then add death, hate, violence, pain, sadness and destruction...
Could it even end, really? When each word further then told a story
of it's own? And with each story lay another jumble of thoughts
and feelings that had, at one point, been existence?
Rose closed her eyes and leaned quietly against the hard metal framework
of the railing that surrounded her perch. What might it be like?
To be free of her own mind? The vile thing was overflowing with
memories of here, then, and now. If only once there could be nothing,
and no one.
Not even her last image of Zeig, straining to let his voice gather
and scream her away. Telling her to run. To fly. To forget and to
escape.
~I'm sorry...~
Instantly crushing those thoughts, she opened her eyes then, and
breathed deeply the scent of sea and air. Soon- and they would arrive.
Soon- and the battles would begin again. The last time, was this?
The last stand? Fate indeed. How exactly had that old saying gone...
We are free to sever the chains of fate that bind us?
"But at what cost, Soa... at what price may we finally escape
you?"
Rose hadn't even realized she'd spoken aloud until the echo of her
words lay consumed within the darkness. Silence once again reined
over both ship and the vast black ocean. A thick silence- until
one single voice stole into it's fabric.
"You ask a question man is not at liberty to answer, Rose..."
Startled- was she? Rose felt her figure tense at the sound, and
with a small tilt of her head she regarded the tones behind her.
Male- for one. Her mind skimmed names and images furiously. Placement
to placement, she instantly recalled the bearer of whose voice was
heard and relaxed.
"Albert..." A pause. "Interesting. I thought you'd
be asleep." The tilt of her head became a swivel, and two cold
eyes lay somewhat wary over the figure which stood behind her. "Something
you needed?"
The king of Serdio stood silently away from her, at the other side
of the crow's nest. Two long arms were draped over one another against
the cold; leaning over the railing much as she was now. He didn't
turn to look at her. Only lowered his head from it's gaze amongst
the black above before slightly moving it to regard her.
"No. But thank you... I'm sorry if I startled-"
Rose cut him off, frank and somber in tone. "You didn't."
She turned back around- eyes again drifting to the void beyond her
vision. "Do you make a habit of so quietly coming upon others?"
Albert remained silent a moment. "I'm sorry for the intrusion,
but I hadn't wanted to disturb you..."
Rose nodded her head once.
And so went a few minutes void of sound other then the slight wavering
fabric of Albert's cape. Rose was slightly surprised she hadn't
noticed the soft rustle of heavy cloth beforehand, but the night
was windy and the steady beat of air drummed along her ears like
a distant flute. Her chin tilted to it's song just as a previous
sentence invaded her thoughts.
~You ask a question man is not at liberty to answer.~
Rose almost felt some insane need to chuckle. She had, hadn't she?
Luckily for her, the deep tones of her voice were not accustomed
to any form of laughter. She settled, then, for another notion that
was perhaps just as insane as the first.
"Your right, you know..." Her voice began. Startling her
nearly, as she was one who far preferred the company of silence
over someone that might actually hear her. What was this? Her starting
a potential conversation? Potential indeed... You couldn't get Albert
to shut up if god forbid you were brave enough to speak to him in
the first place. Her brow twitched, remembering he and that psychotic
plant man back in Tiberoa... They really *had* spoken until morning,
hadn't they?
Her surprise was mundane, but definitely present, when the figure
behind her did not answer in any fashion. It was curiosity alone
that drove her to look away from the sea; and she blinked in slight
confusion- glaring back at him over one shoulder. Perhaps he hadn't
heard?
Rose went back to her study of an indefinable horizon. It really
shouldn't matter anyway, seeing as how she was not the figure of
social interaction in the least. Somehow, a touch of irritation
seeped into her mind. The dark dragoon found her brow beginning
to furrow with one smooth thought.
~Marius. He reminds me of Marius...~
Rose jolted herself straight, mouth slightly agape at the name.
Amazing what thoughts these past few days had brought. More then
she might ever had grasped in all those long years of before. Marius-
dear gods. She hadn't thought of him in over... well...
She couldn't even remember.
With an elegant toss of her black hair, Rose yet again found herself
turning to face the figure behind her. Quietly done, as what would
Albert think of her seeming to take an interest in anything? Especially
that of another person. With a heavy mind her eyes took to working.
To summon the memory, when these days it seemed she was only trying
to forget.
He had his features... was that it? Slightly childlike? Or perhaps
the frame? Eyes? Hair? Or then maybe it was these combined with
the oddity. Silence.
Marius had been a quiet man.
And yet...
*****
"Rose! damn you- Stop! LISTEN to me!"
Two heavy hands grasped her shoulders.
She fought- and he struck.
A searing pain.
Blackness...?
Another hard shake.
"Goddamned BASTARD!" Rose managed to scream. Her body
contorted in agony- tears streaming as she raced for the amber lit
doors ahead.
He caught her.
Threw her backwards.
Her anger became pure fury.
"MARIUS! I will NOT leave him to die! Let me go! The curses
upon you!"
Hate flared.
She Attacked.
"Rose, YOU will die! Is this what Zeig would have wanted? The
madwoman he had loved, throwing her life away!??!!"
More tears.
Marius...
"No! Damn the hells- he lives! I swear this, Marius! I SWEAR
THIS!!!"
She collapsed near the door as they fought.
Dragons crying.
Michael?
"Zeig is DEAD, child! May the goddess help him- but I will
not see you in his grave by fault of mere stupidity!" And he
held her tightly. Ignored the pain of her blows. Kept her within
the temple as fire rained down...
The war was over.
It was done.
They had won.
Rose would have died, had she left.
Marius knew...
Zeig...
And then, she was alone.
*****
Rose came back to herself, the fragments of long forgotten memories
finally content to drip back into the solitude from whence they
came. With their absence she was left shaken. Hating the feeling.
Hating herself for allowing it.
Only memories. Only goddamned memories she wished she could destroy.
~Please... just leave me alone.~
And Rose felt herself, very suddenly, stumbling forwards as a wave
of dizziness consumed her. A reeling of her mind... as if she had
kept those thoughts- one of a plenty million- away for so long that
they now threatened to tear her apart.
Just another of millions...
Absolute millions.
It was with an odd sort of panic then, caught between the crow's
nest railing and the starless sky, that she felt a hand clamp over
her shoulder. It pulled her back, steadied her until the swarming
images passed. She might have been thankful for it... for the voice
that urgently implored her...
"Rose- Rose, What's wrong!?"
Was that Albert?
It wouldn't have mattered, because she heard only the other sound.
That which denied her a solemn wish. Denied her Zeig? Denied her
fate? And she couldn't understand, at that moment, that her thoughts
were tossed in pain. She only understood it's release, and a pure,
violent anger.
"Marius!"
And she growled the next sentence.
"Why couldn't you have just let me DIE!?!?"
Her fist coiled- struck. As if the sudden memory was present in
this very existence. The anger that had fueled her then was gone
quickly as it had come. The confusion remained. Rose turned sharply,
not quite realizing she had been released- and then a flash of wind
and sea water tore her eyes open to see the deck she was soon to
meet. Her body pressed over the railing.
And the hand came back- strong as before- and snatched her away
before a fall could be completed.
A silence.
Had she... nearly died?
Rose felt the twisting of her thoughts begin to subside as, in the
moments after, shaking knees accepted a quick decent, and she lay
hunched over the deck of steel and oak. She coughed- gathering herself
into coherency.
"Rose?"
The same voice from before, only slightly quieter and a bit pained.
Marius?
No.
"Albert..." She said, closing her eyes to reopen them
a second later. The dark of her pupils contracted a moment, struck
by the floodlights from far below. A silence, and she felt her vision
adapt. Another and she could see easily the man before her, crouched
carefully at her side. Rose recognized the light green and brown
of his attire. The sage cape. She did not, however, remember a split
bottom lip adorning his face beforehand.
The realization of what had occurred struck her instantly. She struggled
to stand.
"My god- I..." Rose shook her head, cursing herself for
the loss of control. The absurdity of it, and the crack in her expression
of able stone. Through a veil of hoarse anger and a still clouded
mind she echoed a quiet. "I'm sorry..."
Albert just shook his head. "No- it's fine. Here-" And
he reached a hand down to her wrist, pulling Rose from the cold
ground. "Are you alright? What happened? Rose- you almost fell!"
She briefly took note of the fall that had, moments before, nearly
occurred. Rose blinked twice- running her eyes over the railing
to the ship below. The cables, wires... an officer strolling underneath
the lookout. Hells...
"I'm fine- it was nothing." She stood fully now, extracting
her hand from his shoulder despite the need for balance that was,
if anything, much less then imperfect. Rose felt her spine grow
rigid as her body fought for it's lost defiance, but her feet grew
more and more solid underneath her with each passing moment.
"I don't believe a word of that..." Albert continued,
smearing a bit of blood back onto his sleeve and then wincing in
discomfort. He backed up slightly to the mast; looking down the
ladder and it's lead onto the bridge. Afterwards, he then turned
towards Rose and reached out one gloved hand.
"You should go to the Infirmary."
Rose might have growled. She looked at him, to the ladder, and then
again at his concerned hazel eyes.
"I have no need of medical assistance."
"Rose-" Albert began.
"You know, frankly, this isn't any of your business in the
first place. Back off."
The words were so blunt, and so hostile, Rose found herself shocked
as they spat from her mouth. She didn't... mean it that way. She
didn't even know she'd thought it until the sentence echoed past
her lips. That anger again, had it come from within? God- why all
of a sudden? What was wrong with her?
Albert, in anycase, didn't move away or drop the subject as she
might have expected. He was surprised, yes- but Rose found herself
much of the same when he narrowed his eyes in an uncharacteristic
gesture of irritation, laced with something she couldn't quite understand.
"And *frankly* considering that you shouted a name out of the
clear blue, and stumbled nearly to your death after punching me,
I believe you should reconsider."
Rose glared at him long and hard... probably more out of confusion
then real annoyance. She and Albert were not two who socialized
often- if at all. She spoke to him when needed, and if needed. In
fact, what she knew of his majesty was based strictly from observation...
He was lighthearted, kind to a fault. Not exactly the warrior, but
capable nevertheless. Odd to see this flickering impression of anger
over one that seemed immune to such emotion other then the occasional
glimpses of sadness or melancholy.
"Only a handful of the crewmen are awake at this hour..."
Albert said, folding his arms with the classic grace of habit. His
eyes had lightened, although still Rose could identify that oddity-
the misplaced undertone she had never see before.
"If you go now, no one will know. But your bleeding-"
Albert gingerly motioned to her arm, watching as Rose looked to
a fresh wound in mild shock. "It should be stopped, or your
going to have a mess of concerned dragoons mumbling over your appearance
tomorrow. I know you wouldn't want that. A fuss, I mean. Over you."
Rose shot a glance at him before once more looking over her torn
limb. Apparently, in her stumble at the railing, one of the security
hooks had taken a liking to the soft give of her left arm and it's
cloth. The flesh was split, although not deeply, and would need
some sort of attention. Funny... she hadn't even felt the pain.
~Dammit...~
"I suppose you should accompany me, then." Rose began,
watching him carefully. Albert had the grace to look confused a
moment before she gestured to her mouth, and then smiled almost
wryly as he mimicked her with a start of realization.
"Oh..." he brought his hand away, still laced with the
blood she had drawn. "That."
"Yes. That." Rose flipped a stream of hair along one shoulder
and then directed her attention to the ladder- quickly beginning
a decent to the decks below.
Albert watched after her a moment, and then followed.
***
The infirmary was a ludicrous little room- far past the bridge,
aft quarter halls and a few floors down from there. God forbid the
ship ever saw some sort of catastrophe... where would all the injured
be placed? And how would they even find the damned thing, buried
away under decks of iron and winding passageways?
In anycase, Rose was thankful for Albert's presence. It really wasn't
surprising that he knew exactly where to go and how to go about
getting there. (He and captain Puler had gone over the ships blueprints
earlier that day.) Past the aft bulkhead, the stewards room... that
annoying little chamber in which the cook would scurry to and fro...
They walked silently and quickly down the narrow halls.
Well, at the least her company wasn't stupid. He'd been smart enough
to keep his mouth shut for the most part. Occasional exceptions
being a "left" or "right" As they navigated
the dim ship. Rose was nearly feeling a hint of rare claustrophobia...
but perhaps it was really just her damaged arm, which was gathering
the nerve to begin a steady, painful throb.
"Here." Albert said- an odd sound over the drumming machinery
that echoed just below. Rose jerked her head to the right where
he then gestured and found herself glaring at a dull blue door.
On and off blinked an irritating white light; caged behind wire
just above the worn frame. Below was a tiny stenciled band of red
lettering that read INFIRMARY as if the stupid thing wasn't hard
enough to find in the first place.
She gave a rough snort, and pushed into the doorway; hinges rattling
in her wake. Albert just blinked, ducked a stray metal pipe, and
entered after her.
Thank god... no doctor. Rose greatly disliked doctors. All that
met her vision was a row of stark medical beds and a similar row
of cabinets mounted over the wall ahead of them. A few trays...
a few oddball utensils. One giant microscope that seemed entirely
out of place. And then there was two conjoined sinks- white like
the room and the beds and the walls. The damned place looked so
cold...
A sharp click brought her observations to an end. Rose turned stiffly,
watching in a detached manner as Albert opened one of the cabinets
and studied it's contents for a moment. A second later- and he nodded
his head in some form of approval before removing a small wrap bandage
and bottle of antiseptic. These- he handed to her.
Bah- what Rose wouldn't give for just a damned potion. Shana and
Meru held on to the most of their supplies... and she wasn't about
to subject herself to their attentions. Unfortunately, Albert wasn't
one to carry healing items either.
"You may need another type of cloth for the wound. So it won't
stick, I mean. There are two others that-" And Albert raised
a brow as she cut him off with a hiss and took the items.
"I've only been handling myself for eleven thousand years or
so. Believe me- I know what I do and don't need."
Albert breathed a sigh and watched as Rose took to the other side
of the room; seating herself upon one of the medical tables and
then quickly going about her injury. She opened the bottle of antiseptic,
plastered her wound in it's liquid with no more then the slightest
wince, and after removing a bit of her sleeve- split the gash with
her fingers to study the rip.
"Aren't there scissors in that damned drawer?"
Albert looked. Nodded.
"Toss them over here."
Rose couldn't help her exasperation as he handed them to her -handle
first- with an almost parental frown.
"Your pathetic."
"I'm careful."
"Hmph..."
Albert wandered back to the open drawer, extracting then a small
cotton before returning to where Rose now grimaced freely. The Dark
Dragoon was cutting away a small piece of jagged flesh that hung
limply against her arm. He stilled, brows furrowing. Rose shot her
eyes in his direction.
"Don't tell me I'm upsetting your stomach..." and she
cut away the skin completely.
Albert shook his head. "Only my mind, perhaps. You go about
this in to familiar a manner..." And he sat down across from
her, applying a small amount of antiseptic to the cotton, and then
pressing it against the slight swell over his mouth.
Rose blinked. "After a while, you get used to such irritations..."
Her right hand reached for the bandage, which she began to unwind
quickly from the neatly packaged roll. "Your going to need
ice on-"
"I may not have your eleven thousand years worth of experience-"
Albert interrupted, a hint of amusement flickering over his features.
"But I do know how to tend a split lip."
It was her turn to sigh. Rose jerked the bandage tight over her
arm and glared at him with forced hostility. "Don't get smart
with me..."
"Wouldn't dream of it..."
Rose studied him a moment, watching the sage cape flutter as Albert
rose and once again paced across the room. He placed the antiseptic
and what was left of the wrap back into the drawer, closed it, and
then moved slightly to the left where another cabinet was mounted
over the wall. Click and snap- he'd found an ice pack easily enough.
Brief silence.
"You know..." And Rose was surprised to find herself speaking.
"We're going to need a explanation of some sort."
Albert turned- raised a brow. What was with him and that habit?
"Your mouth." She gestured to her own. "I can hide
my arm easily enough- but what about that lip? I get the distinct
feeling your not about to go telling the rest of our company you
were decked by a bout of insanity on my part..."
Albert just nodded. "True... I suppose I could have simply
fell, right? And god knows how easy it is to just stroll into one
of the pipes on these lower decks..." He turned his attention
to the single microscope present; absently toying with it's components
in a sudden run of curiosity. "I think I'm clumsy enough to
go and do something of that sort, don't you?"
Rose grinned, and then instantly wiped the expression from her face.
"For once, we agree. And here I was hoping your terribly irritating
persona had been floored by one of the stewards..."
Albert twitched his mouth and glared at her with a smile. "To
unbelievable... unless it's custom to *floor* royalty this part
of Endiness."
Again, she felt that uncharacteristic urge pull at the corners of
her mouth. Goddamnit- the fool was getting the best of her, was
he? Rose supposed it wasn't such a horror, really... but it felt
abnormal. To laugh and smile.
"You should probably get some sleep." Rose heard herself
say. "We'll be arriving tomorrow afternoon." And she pushed
herself from the medical bed, shaking her arm once to renew the
circulation within.
"I suppose telling you the same would be futile, yes?"
"Utterly."
Albert nodded once, expectantly, and then his brows narrowed to
the thin line of worry she had seen before. To see it genuine, and
on a person of all living creatures, was perhaps odd as the silence
beforehand that had first started her mind to memory.
"Then you'll be returning to the crow's nest." He said.
Similar to the nod- there was expectancy again in his tone.
"You don't know that." Rose turned slightly.
"But you will."
Black raven hair fell into her vision, forcing Rose to blink away
it's fine strands like murky streams of water. Her head tilted thoughtfully,
as if it was a statement that demanded a sharp retort or angry sentence.
"Wasn't it that sort of concern that got you decked in the
first place?
"It wouldn't matter either way, Rose. I'm your friend."
Her look then, turning sharply in his direction, was answered with
a calm addition to the previous sentence. Albert crossed his arms,
leaning back just slightly.
"-Whether you like it or not."
It was with the oddest of feelings to discover herself watching
him then; hand poised at the door and injured arm limp. Albert too
regarded her with that exact measure of confusion and inquiry she
felt in her own gaze. Like a practice- or effort. Or... or something
so foreign it seemed native.
~Don't act like I could ever learn...~
To love, to know, to trust...
To find the strength to believe in a friend.
To forget.
To live.
Ever?
Ever.
Ever again...
~because I let no one understand me.~
Albert looked to her as if he had heard every single word.
Rose felt somehow uneasy. As if wasn't that she hadn't understood
what he's said, it was that she found herself wanting to accept
it. Swinging back around, Rose struggled with two concepts then.
The first- to open the door and leave.
Run.
Or stay and try to make him believe she didn't care that he had
somehow scathed a very solid stone. As if despite all she considered
false- his voice didn't ring of it. Sincerity? And just what was
it he had said that were so sincere? What was it, about him, that
truly had revived her memories of the long dead Marius? Why him?
Why then?
~God no- don't think of that again...~
Why should it have even mattered?
And then, very suddenly, she felt an anger rise within her chest.
As if the absurdity of the entire night would cause her to do something
just as utterly vain. Perhaps even understandable- for a person
who now found herself searching for some form of answer.
"Why were you there?!" Rose nearly shouted- and her voice
lowered instantly as if cut over a sharp wire. "Above, over
the crows nest!?"
The question took him completely off guard, and Albert winced, thrown
back by her supreme glare as if it was a type of accusation. Rose
felt herself thankful to push him away... to keep him from...
~From what? Keep him from what? Keep any of them from... what!?~
Albert didn't answer, only looked away... and then asked her a question
of his own that was blunt- but not hostile. His gaze was almost...
sad. A toss of light brown fell over his left eye.
"Who is Marius?"
~No... don't you dare...~ She jumped the question and flung it aside
in a near panic.
"Answer me first." Rose demanded. The ludicrous part of
this entire scenario was that she had no reason to question his
presence in the first place. He was not an enemy. He was not there
to harm her or any of the others. And yet here she stood, fists
clenched and jaw firm, as if that very question could somehow solve
her own suffering.
~I don't suffer. I survive.~
But then why am I lying?
Albert just glared at her. "Why!? How does it pertain to anything
that-" Rose cut him off, throwing her good arm in the air violently.
"Albert- just ANSWER me!!"
It came back to his face. What she had seen before; the undertone
of *something* that she couldn't identify or understand. This time,
she was the one that winced in surprise as he stalked forwards in
exasperation. Whatever mutual pleasant air had surrounded them before
was most definitely now gone.
Not as if she had ever been one to back off. Albert wasn't the one
making her uncomfortable now. She could control this.
Her gaze lifted to his height. "Why can't you just say it?!"
The Serdian let an almost cruel smile adorn his face. "Why
can't you? it's the same, isn't it?! For both of us!? All the goddamned
stupid things your never supposed to give in to... those that manage
to haunt whatever perfect part of life you think you've finally
worked out!? Why can't *YOU* say it, Rose!? What can't you tell
Dart, Haschel or Shana- ANY of us!?"
She stood, shocked.
"Why-" And he broke off, stepping away in a sort of frustration.
"Why should it even matter...?"
Her words...
And somehow- that was it. Rose could not understand what she had
seen in him before- because it was a reflection. Her own goddamned
reflection.
He helped me.
Because it was necessary-
and I hate him.
Because I can see.
It is what I don't want to know.
Because I can overcome it.
And still...
It was pain.
It was Marius who had once told her they were so different, they
were alike. She remembered it now; like a broken piece of glass.
With a deep breath, Rose felt her old self trying to defy the realization.
She gripped her strong facade and glared it into the man across
from her for whom she refused to recognize the same.
"I don't... know what your saying!" And her voice was
strong, rough and angry. Like it was supposed to be. How she had
always known it. "You actually have the *nerve* to think I-"
But Albert swung back around to interrupt her.
"Just stop it." And he looked at her in part disbelief,
and part sorrow. "And I'm not speaking of Marius, long dead
as my ancestor is now. I'm speaking about you. What you try to hide.
If you never let anyone within, Rose..." He closed his eyes
and let that last bit of tension slip away. "It's going to
kill you, just like it nearly did me.
Rose felt herself slipping as he continued.
"And frankly- I don't care how long you've lived or what you
know. It will always be the same. End the same." Albert brushed
his hair back and lowered his eyes. "I was above tonight because
I needed to be alone. At the very least I knew you needed the same
thing... so in some way it would be alright."
The dark dragoon stared at him, at a loss for completely... Everything.
This stupid, incompetent, ignorant king had... and she took her
thoughts back, because they did not apply. All Albert had done was
understand.
But then how...
Could it hurt this much?
*****
Rose cried out. Her sword swung.
A sound- like flesh.
Red...
"Marius!" And she cried out his name as if to destroy
him with it.
He did not fight back.
A cry.
His... son?
"If this is what shall calm your spirit Rose, then take my
life. If this is what you believe, then slay me."
And he had spoken so calmly as her sword lifted
And he did not close his eyes
And the three kingdoms of Endiness would never be told.
Kneeling in blood.
Her voice- lost in sobs.
It had been she.
Rose had slain one of her greatest companions.
Had killed the first blood of Serdio.
And he hadn't made a sound...
***
(( The second half of this story is now Chapter 2 for ease in reading.
Enjoy!))