Chapter 1
Spencer gingerly lowered herself onto the sofa in the barn, Emily and Hannah supporting her either side. She had just been released from the hospital and was on strict bed rest, or as Spencer liked to call it, prison. Ali and Aria were making sure all the doors and windows were locked, the girls had been on edge ever since the night Spencer was shot. They were all waiting for A.D to make their next move on one of them. It was as if they wanted to prove how far they were willing to go, that they could kill them as easily as killing a pawn in a game of chess. That's what the girls felt like, pawns in a game they had no control over. No idea of when the next move might be.
"Thanks guys but I'm ok now, you don't have to stay" Spencer told the girls, wanting to be left alone for a while to process all that had happened.
"Are you sure Spence?" Emily questioned, doubt written across her face at leaving her friend after only just being released from the hospital.
"I'm sure. I should get some rest anyway and if anything happens I have you all on speed dial, I'll be fine. Plus there is a cop directly outside my house" she empathised, trying her best to encourage the girls that she really was ok when she secretly felt as though she was dying inside.
"Ok we'll go but we will be back later to check on you so don't get any bright ideas of going anywhere" Hannah said sternly.
The girls filed out of the door and headed back to Lucas's apartment to regroup and fill Mona in on all that had transpired. Meanwhile back at the barn Spencer was finally alone with her thoughts. She felt as though her whole world was slowly crumbling around her, that all she had thought true and real was nothing but lies and deceit. It's no wonder that she couldn't trust anybody after all A had put her through and now to find out that the people closest to her, the ones who said they loved her had lied to her from the very beginning. She wasn't a Hasting. She was a Drake. All she thought she knew about herself suddenly evaporated. She slowly got up and walked over to the mirror hanging over the mantle. As she looked at the girl in the reflection she realised she had no idea who that girl was anymore and it terrified her. Everything now made sense. Why Mrs D never liked her, why her parents didn't want her hanging around Alison, why their families never got on. But what mostly stood was the feeling she had always had of not belonging. That she was nothing but a burden her family wished they didn't have. Spencer lifted up her shirt to reveal her bandaged chest. It still hurt like hell and she knew she would have to be careful so she wouldn't rip out the stitches. She was lucky to be alive the doctor had told her. Right now she didn't feel lucky. Here she was, standing in the barn, bullet wound in her chest, a family that wasn't even her real family and unloved and unwanted by the only man she would ever love. It hurt too much to think of Toby right now. She was so thankful he hadn't been hurt...
Flashback
Spencer was lying in the hospital bed staring blankly at the wall when the door opened and Emily walked in, worry in her eyes.
"Em? What's wrong?" Spencer asked, concern lacing her voice.
"There was an accident. Toby and Yvonne were involved..."
"Toby?! Is he ok? I have to see him Em can you take me to him?" Spencer asked, pushing herself up out of the bed as she spoke. Suddenly she cried out in pain.
"Take it easy Spence. You can't go anywhere you've only just come out of surgery yourself; your weak and you could damage your wound more." Emily gently reprimanded her as she tried to ease her back in the bed. Spencer pushed against her, every bone in her body screaming at her to put but her heart was telling her she had to see him. Had to know that he was ok.
"Em please!" Spencer implored her, looking at her with desperate eyes.
"Ok". Emily helped her get dressed, at Spencer's insistence, into ordinary clothes. She didn't want to look like a patient and worry Toby when he was in a bad way himself. They made their way to Toby's room...slowly. Spencer carefully opened the door, her heart lurching at the sight of him battered and bruised i the hospital bed. She walked over and placed her hand over his thinking how much she wanted o lie next to him and stay that way forever. Toby opened his eyes at her touch, at first not registering that it was her at his bedside. Once his mind caught up with what he was seeing his expression changed. Spencer had never seen that much anger or that much hate directed at her before, especially from him.
"What are you doing here?" he said tersely, clearly trying to contain his anger. Spencer stood there mute, stunned into silence, unsure of what she had done wrong to deserve his wrath.
"I uh heard you were in a car accident and I had to make sure you were ok. How is Yvonne? She's not..." Spencer trailed off as she watched Toby's eyes narrow even further at the mention of his fiancé's name. As much as she wished Yvonne would go away so she could have Toby back she also liked the girl and hoped nothing had happened to her.
"Yvonne is fine no thanks to you" he responded. Toby couldn't believe the gall of her to come to his bedside after what she did. It was her fault he crashed his jeep. It was her fault he nearly broke up with Yvonne and nearly lost her altogether. All because of one stupid mistaken kiss. Toby stared into the hurt eyes of the girl he used to love. He couldn't believe he nearly threw everything away all because he felt a flicker of something when their lips met. No! He wouldn't go down that road again. Better to be with someone who didn't have a stalker following them and trying to kill them every five seconds. He knew deep down he was being unfair to Spencer but right now he didn't care.
"I want you to leave and I don't want to see you again. This is all your fault. That kiss, which was a mistake, should never have happened. I love Yvonne not you, not anymore" he told her, never taking his eyes off her. He watched her face crumble but saw her quickly hide it and hold her head a little higher. She sniffed once and walked out the door, he noticed very slowly, as if she was in pain. He didn't give it another thought.
End of flashback
Spencer felt tears rolling down her cheeks at the memory. The look in his eyes, the hurtful words spoken. She quickly wiped them away. Emily had tried to reassure her that he didn't mean it, that he was just in pain and worried about Yvonne but Spencer knew Toby better than anyone else and she knew he wasn't lying. There was a sudden knock at the door causing Spencer to jump. She walked over, unsure if she should answer when the knock came again only this time more urgently. Spencer slowly turned the door handle and pulled open the door.
"What do you want?" she snapped at the person on the other side of the door, wondering to herself how it had all come to this.
