This story contains hard drug use, graphic sex scenes and explicit language. It's rated R for a reason. I will not compromise this story for anyone and those who are against anything mentioned above may not want to read this.

This chapter expands over:

July 16th


Addiction.

Such a strong word. A distinctive word. An addictive word.

The dictionary describes it as a "compulsive physiological and psychological need for a habit-forming substance."

Sounds rigid, doesn't it? I'll give the dictionary it's dues though, it tries to capture the essence of an addiction the best that it can. But until you've been through one, you'll never know what it's like.

You'll never know what it's like to make empty promises to someone for one more shot.

You'll never know what it's like to crave something so much you'd sell your soul for one final line.

You'll never know what it's like to be captured in a wave of depression before a single pill lifts your sprits up again.

You'll never know what it's like to be so enraged that your addiction could be taken from you that you'd hurt the single person who ever loved you in your entire life. I do anything to feed my habit. And I mean, anything.

I killed my lover over an addiction. An addiction that took over my entire body. An addiction that dragged me through hell, chewed me up and spat me back out again leaving me as a useless, lifeless cheap imitation of the man I once was.

My days are numbered. I know it's going to kill me. I have trouble breathing and haven't been outside for two weeks now. I haven't eaten in four days. I have my dead boyfriend lying in a heap downstairs and I don't care.

All I care about now is heroin.