Disclaimer: I don't own Kingdom Hearts.
Warnings: Rambling towards the end and Roxiku.
Notes: Um, this isn't one of the promised updates. Sorry, but school kinda went "no free time for you! mwahaha" this weekend, pretty much, so I'll be slowly updating and replying over the week. I'm SO sorry to the people who I promised stuff to, just know that I WILL get to it. ;.;
Also, this is a product of schoolnight insomnia. You have been warned.
Words of Twilight
It seems that the more I know, the less I understand. Things that I think should be, aren't, and things that I think should not be, are. It makes very little sense, what is and isn't, and in the confusion I get lost. I drown in my misunderstandings, until I can't remember where I started from, or where I was going. I get lost in what is.
I see Kairi, and think that she should be revered. She is pure, too pure to be anywhere but here. Here being the island that she loves, and it is best for her because it is beautiful and she is beautiful and it is as light as a world can be, but still stained, and so she shines brighter, neither sullied nor outshone by the world.
I see Sora, and think that he should be respected. He is pure as well, not as much as Kairi, but as pure as his island, and it is truly his because of that. He should be admired, not just on this backwater world that does not know how to treat the Keyblade Master beyond showing him the simple joy and courtesy that he so craves, but throughout the galaxy. Instead, he is forgotten, a mere boy, they think, and he hides behind Kairi's light because that is all he wishes to be. A mere boy.
I see Naminé, and think that she should be remembered. She is neither pure nor dirty, neither stained nor staining; she simply is, in the same manner that light is and darkness is, with no need for explanation or purpose. Her power lies in memories, in feelings and thoughts and those pictures that we hold on to for when we have nothing else see. She absents herself from the hearts of those that know her, so that they don't truly know her, they simply know of her, and so she is forgotten.
I see other people, people that they have known or will know, and think many things of them. Some people, I think, should not be, or should not be what they are, and yet they are. Other people I see, people that never were yet should have been, for there are holes left that should be filled, but I can do nothing to fill them.
I see a person who can fill them. Not because he is so many people, or can be so many people, but because he is himself and he himself is a different person to everybody he meets. To Sora he is a friend, to Kairi, a brother, to Naminé, a guardian, and to me, an enigma. He is everything and he is nothing and he was light and was darkness and so now he is twilight and will be dawn.
I see Riku, and think he should not have been. Because he is Riku, and Riku is a different person to everybody, and that is something that should not be. But Riku, underneath the different people, is simply Riku, and that is why he is. He is no friend, no brother, no guardian, no enigma, no light or darkness or twilight. He is simply dawn, dawn in the form of one boy who had the light of an unsullied world and stained it, yet threw away the darkness that he used to do it as well, leaving himself with nothing. And that is what he truly is, because dawn is empty like Riku is empty, neither darkness nor light. And that means that dawn is nothing.
I see myself, and think that I should love him. Because I am nothing and he is nothing but he is dawn and I am twilight and so we should have nothing at all, neither of us should have light or darkness or friends or guardians or families. And so we should have each other, and truly have nothing, and it is these thoughts that sent me to him in the first place and these thoughts that sent him to me and these thoughts that made us battle.
Because as much as some things should be and aren't or should not be and are, we are ourselves and nothing should tell us what to be or have or do.
But now things have changed, and no longer should I love him or should he love me. And I think that that is the reason for why we do.
It is impossible now, strictly impossible, because night and day lie between dawn and twilight, and no matter what we do we'll never be together, and yet, we love each other and both of us know it and accept it.
We love nothing and are nothing and no one else knows or understands.
We are twilight and dawn, and just as I see the holes he fills them, and that is something that should be and is, and I understand that.
