For I Couldn't Live Without You
Written by Extreme Psycho
Prologue
She felt strange as she sat up in her bed. She couldn't tell what had awakened her, but something was not right. Everything in the master bedroom was still the same: the furniture was in its same place, the window still remained slightly ajar, but something was out of place. She looked to her left and could see that the body that had kept her warm was missing from its spot. With a rush of panic Narcissa Malfoy jumped out of her queen sized bed. She rushed for the door leaving the familiar room behind her.
She practically ran down the hall leaving no time to light her way along the pitch black corridors. Only one thought was present her mind: where was her husband? Lucius had promised that he would wake her if the Dark Lord summoned him. Narcissa was no fool and she knew Lucius well. She knew that he would do this on his own. He hated her seeing him in this weakened state. It was obvious and she could tell by the small glimpses she received of him. Lucius would smile and he would laugh, but it would dissolve into something—something Narcissa couldn't handle—it would turn into self loathing when he thought no one was looking. Narcissa hated this. She hated him regretting every decision he had made. Every decision they had made.
Narcissa slowed her pace. She had reached the far west corridor, which was a place in which the Dark Lord would occasionally made residence. She pressed her ear against the door, but heard no sound. Feeling rather panicked she strained up and pressed her ear to press completely against the door. This had no effect and she found herself listening to the stale silence.
"What are you doing out of bed?" A voice drawled from behind her. Causing Narcissa to let out a sigh of relief and rested her forehead against the cold door in front of her.
"I thought he summoned you. You were absent when I awoke," she said breathlessly. At the sound of her words he placed a warm hand on her shoulder and squeezed it slightly.
"I'm sorry to scare you like that," he whispered and Narcissa turned to face her dear husband.
He stood in front of her looking extremely exhausted with the dark circles underneath his piercing gray eyes. He winked at her when he noticed her face fall into a frown. Lucius, who was resigned to calm his wife's nerves, wiggled a cup of water in front of her. "I was only thirsty," he stated bluntly.
Narcissa didn't remove her frown, "You look tired."
Lucius nodded as he took his free hand and ran it through his tangled white-blond hair, "Only a little," he lied.
"Lucius," Narcissa pleaded as she moved closer to him. "You have to start taking better care of yourself," she whispered before placing her hand on his pale white cheek. She could see perfectly the damage the Dark Lord had inflicted on his beautiful face only a few weeks ago and it pained her. "Please take care of yourself."
"Why bother?" Lucius asked as he sighed angrily.
Narcissa bit the inside of her lip as she looked at his worn face, "Because I still need you here."
Lucius frowned at her comment, "No one needs me," he said coldly and Narcissa dropped her hand from his face.
"That's a lie Lucius Malfoy, and you know it!" Narcissa shouted not even bothering to hold down her voice.
Lucius grunted at her comment, "I'm useless, and you know that Narcissa."
Narcissa knew he'd been feeling like this. She knew it since she saw him return from Azkaban. She could tell that a small part of Lucius Malfoy wanted to go back to the way things were before the time of the Dark Lord. "You may have lost your wand, your prestige, and your honor, but you have not lost your family. And to us you will never—and I mean never—be useless," Narcissa said forcefully as she moved closer to him.
"I have ruined us."
It was nothing more then a distraught whisper, but Narcissa caught every small word. "We are not ruined, Lucius. We did what we thought was best for our family. The journal, the World Cup, the graveyard, the Ministry, and everything before and after that; these have been our decisions, Lucius. Our choices," Narcissa said her voice quivering slightly.
"I promised to protect you—"
Narcissa placed a small finger on his swollen lips and smiled. "You have."
"I went to prison, Narcissa. I've had to witness you get tortured because of my mistakes. And Draco, my only son, is a Death Eater. I have failed the both of you," Lucius said as his eyes filled with sadness that Narcissa couldn't handle.
"I knew the consequences of falling in love with you, Lucius. The consequences could never frighten me away because the possibility of you loving me chased away all fear of what was to come. I wanted to be with you. I want to be with you forever, Lucius Malfoy. I love you. I love you so much!" Narcissa said tears falling from her bright blue eyes.
Lucius tried to speak, but Narcissa continued.
"No, don't speak. Just listen," she pleaded before going on with her speech. "I've loved you from the moment I saw you and I know that's true now. As a foolish girl I didn't know what I felt nor did I even want to feel the way I felt. Suddenly I couldn't handle it. I did everything in my power to get you to notice the way I felt and have you love me the way I loved you. Our relationship went up and down, Lucius. It was crazy and heartbreaking, but at the same time it was absolutely blissful."
Narcissa paused taking in a shuttered sigh. Lucius knew she wasn't finished and let her continue her speech of undying love.
"I can still remember vividly our first kiss, Lucius, both of us sitting on the Hogwarts Express with you cupping my cheek and moving me up to your lips. I can still remember the tremendous feeling," Narcissa breathed in slightly before moving on. "Do you remember that?"
"Yes," Lucius said simply without hesitation.
Narcissa smiled, "Do you still feel like that, Lucius, that tremendous feeling?"
Lucius let out a gentle smile and placed his free hand on his wife's cheek. "Of course, I have always felt that way about you, Narcissa."
Narcissa smiled and stepped closer to her husband wrapping her frail arms around his waist. "I still need you, Lucius, for I couldn't live without you."
