Disclaimer : I don't own Inuyasha, and I don't own "Stupid Boy."
Stupid Boy.
…
The gentle roar of the engine purred beneath her as she turned the ignition of the car. She slipped on her seatbelt, put the car into drive, and pulled out of her driveway onto the street. It had taken a little while to get used to—this new living style that was most certainly for the best. Odd as it was for her to live with her mother and Kagome rather than her father, she knew it was better this way. With her new car, her new cell phone number, and her new home, it was a fresh start in a new place with new people. Of course, it wasn't completely a fresh start, but it was a new start nonetheless. She had kept her old friend and added new ones. It was the happiest she had felt in a while.
As she parked her car, Kikyou gathered her purse and stepped out into the chill afternoon air. Her mother was at work, and Kagome had stayed over at a friend's to work on a project, so she had volunteered to go to the grocery store. As she strolled down aisle after aisle, pushing a slowly filling shopping cart before her, she couldn't help but remember how she had ended up in this new town with the other part her rarely visited, though not estranged, family…
"Hello there." His charming smile, and odd features had caught my attention even before he spoke to me. With his ashen but light hair and green-gold eyes, he was undoubtedly the most unique, yet attractive man I had ever met.
I smiled slightly, without a blush, I might add. "Hello." I returned the greeting, but I didn't go out of my way to start a conversation. Honestly, I admit I judged him from the beginning—he looked the type that was just out to get a quick floozy and was then on to his next target. To my surprise, however, he seemed completely unabashed despite the lack of articulation on my part and continued on.
"The name's Inuyasha." He held out his hand before me.
I hesitated a moment, but replied. "I'm Kikyou." Reaching forward, I placed my hand in his for what I assumed would be a handshake, but once again, he'd surprised me as he gently turned his hand so mine was flat over his and placed a chaste kiss upon my knuckles. Heat rushed to my face in what could have been nothing other than quite possibly the brightest blush I could ever remember having tinted across my usually pale complexion cheeks. I can't remember what he said after that, or with what words I had replied, but I remembered seeing something in his eyes when he looked at me that told me he was sincere in his pursuit.
"I'm off, dad! I'll be back a little later." I smiled and waved as I headed toward the front door.
"Did you finish your homework?" My father gave me his suspicious look, but I have no idea why, and I honestly mean that.
"Of course! I love to have fun, but I always do it after my schoolwork. You know that very well!" I stuck my tongue out at him in a childish manner, and winked. My dad smiled at me and told me to have a good time, but not to stay out late. I promised, and gave him a hug before I went out and got in my car. Excitement flooded my sense as I drove to my destination, and perhaps a little nervousness had impeded into my normally calm mind as I arrived at the party. I hadn't mentioned specifically where I was off to, because I figured as long as he didn't know, he couldn't object… right? Besides, it wasn't as if I had lied. He hadn't asked, so didn't lie… It was only a small bit of information kept conveniently in my confidence… and the confidence of my friends. I may not have told my father, but I had told my friend. If I had told no one, and something had happened, I would've been in a bind.
Self-inflicted guilt aside, I stepped out of my car and pushed the lock button on my keys. I spotted Inuyasha almost instantly, and I hurried over to him. I flashed him a smile. "Hey, Inuyasha." I gave him a quick peck on the cheek and slipped my hand into his.
He smiled at me, and I could see the smile reflected in his eyes. The thought made my heart beat a little faster. "I missed you." He kissed my cheek as I had kissed his, and pulled me along with him as he began to walk through the surrounding crowds of people. I raised an eyebrow slightly at the comment, but didn't question him, even though he had seen me just yesterday.
I watched as my fellow peers drank any alcoholic drink they could get their hands on. Most of the people were only there to get drunk. I had never had a particular interest in drinking, though I was not abstinent to the thought of trying something. Inuyasha pulled me over to the bar and poured us each a cup of beer. I lifted the cup to my lips, and took a sip, letting the taste infiltrate my mouth. I can't say I particularly liked it. In fact, I didn't like it all. Still, I kept the cup and continued to drink it. After I finished my first, Inuyasha had poured me another. I imagine I looked at the new cup with a little resentment, but took it anyway and began drinking it again.
Before I had gotten half way through my second, I was feeling woozy and figured I should stop. That exact thought was then followed by an immediate and unexpected upchuck reflex on my part. Poor Inuyasha, I thought sadly. As he was next to me, I had unintentionally emptied the contents of the night's beverage all over him. Apparently I had a low tolerance for alcohol. "I'm sorry," I said weakly. "I'd better go." He nodded, and let me go, but only after hesitantly releasing my hand.
Well she was precious like a flower
She grew wild, wild but innocent
A perfect prayer in a desperate hour
She was everything beautiful and different
Despite my better judgment, I got into my car, and slowly drove home. I was just one block away, but I knew I probably shouldn't have done what I had, both the drinking and the driving, even more so considering I did them together without so much as 15 minutes in between. I still don't know how I got so lucky as to have avoided my dad when I got home.
I jolted awake. I thought I had heard something, but as I glanced around my room, I didn't see anything amiss. "I must have imagined it," I muttered to myself. Then I heard it again.
Ping.
I glanced toward my window, and climbed out of my bed. I walked slowly to my window, and peaked from the corner of the curtain. I narrowed my eyes, trying to get a closer glance at the figure that appeared to be moving below.
Ping.
The noise directly in front of me startled me, and I toppled backwards onto the carpet floor. I hurried got back up and glance back through the crack between the curtain and the windowpane. I heard the long whistle of wind blowing through the branches of the trees. With the breeze shifting the branches, pale moonlight filtered through and illuminated the figure beneath its branches.
'Inuyasha!' I screamed in my mind. I parted the curtains, and opened the window.
"Inuyasha? What are you doing here?"
He was looking particularly guilty staring up at me from his spot below. "I came to check up on you. I shouldn't have just let you leave."
I smiled. The idea that he was worried was sweet. "Its okay, Inuyasha. I'm fine. I'll see you tomorrow, okay?"
"Alright… I just couldn't wait to see you until tomorrow, though. I wanted to make sure you got home and everything…"
It felt a little weird to me… this conversation taking place one story apart at 1 A.M. The whole idea of this just felt… wrong to me. "Uh… thank you for your concern, Inuyasha. I'll see you tomorrow, though, okay? My dad might wake up. Night, Inuyasha."
"Good night, Kikyou. I love you, baby." He waved and smiled at me, then turned and walked off.
I watched as he left, and I felt out of place, more so now than I had before. Inuyasha had just said he loved me, and rather than feeling elated, I felt something else entirely. I wasn't even sure what it was. Perhaps my mind had finally awoken and pushed aside my naïve thoughts of a chivalrous knight-in-armor guy who had swept me off me feet. This new feeling was cold and unwelcome. It wasn't that I didn't believe him. Oh, no, it wasn't that at all! It was the fact that, coupled with the sincerity I can always see in his eyes when they are directed at me, I believed him completely! That he could love me in such a small amount of time unnerved me. He didn't know me nearly as well as he thought he did, and I didn't know him nearly as well as I would have to in order to return his feelings. I had never been looking for something as serious as this from him. I had never expected it to go past anything other than a silly crush on my part and flirting words from him.
Stupid boy…you can't fence that in
Stupid boy…it's like holdin' back the wind
This was certainly something I didn't want, and as I laid back in my bed, the sheets seemed colder, and sleep evaded me.
"Hey, Kik," Inuyasha greeted me with his usual smile and familiar words.
Unsurprisingly, I could only reply with the usual words and half the sincerity. "Hello, Inuyasha."
Inuyasha noticed this immediately, and it bothered me. Perhaps he did know me better than I thought he did. "Are you okay, Kikyou? Is something the matter? Anything I can help with?"
I took a deep breath and quickly ran through what I was going to say. "Inuyasha…" I paused, unsure of how to continue. What could I tell him other than the truth? Anything else, I'm sure! I was too close to panicking though, and for lacking of complete thought before I spoke, I decided the truth was best. "I'm so sorry, Inuyasha! I don't love you like you love me! I never thought you were that serious, but I know you are now. I had always loved the attention you gave me, but I can't ask you to do that—knowing how you feel, I just can't. I think it would be better if we stopped this."
He seemed shell-shocked for a few moments, and I shifted uncomfortably before him. I didn't know what else to do. Finally after a minute or two of silence, he spoke. "Is it something I did to upset you? Because whatever it was, I wasn't trying to upset you. You have to believe me!"
His words were passionate, and it only strengthened my resolve. "No! It's not something you did; it's something I didn't see until now. I can't return you're feelings. We cannot be together anymore! I'm sorry, but I don't want to see you, or you to see me again." I turned, not waiting to hear his response and hurried away. I didn't look back. I didn't want to see whatever emotion was written on his face.
Riiing! Riiiing!
"You have reached the Higurashi residence. Please leave a name, number, and a message after the tone and we will return you call."
Beep.
"Kikyou, this is Inuyasha. I know you said you didn't want to see me anymore, but we can work this out! I really do love you."
Riiing! Riiiing!
"You have reached the Higurashi residence. Please leave a name, number, and a message after the tone and we will return you call."
Beep.
"Kikyou, this is Inuyasha again. Please call me back. I miss you."
Riiing! Riiiing!
"You have reached the Higurashi residence. Please leave a name, number, and a message after the tone and we will return you call."
Beep.
"Kikyou, please return my call. It's just not the same. I have to see and talk to you. Please."
Riiing! Riiiing!
"You have reached the Higurashi residence. Please leave a name, number, and a message after the tone and we will return you call."
Beep.
"Kikyou, no one loves you like I do! I can't live without you."
She laid her heart and soul right in your hands
And you stole her every dream and you crushed her plans
She never even knew she had a choice
And that's what happens when the only voice
She hears is telling her she can't
Stupid boy
Stupid boy
"Kikyou."
I looked up at the determined face of my father. "Yes?"
"I don't want you to go anywhere near or talk to that Inuyasha boy! Get rid of him, now!"
I started panicking. I really didn't know what to do. "I've tried, I really have! I told him I didn't want us to see each other again the first time he said he loved me! He just keeps calling—really, I told him no, but he won't stop!" My eyes were watering greatly at this point. He leaned down and embraced me in a hug.
"If he won't stay away, then I'll send you were he isn't."
I nodded absently. I just had to get away. His insistence was maddening, and I think he was bordering on the line of insanity.
So what made you think you could take a life
And just push it, push it around
I guess to build yourself up so high
You had to take her and break her down
I placed the groceries in the trunk of my car, and got in. I slipped on my seatbelt, and place my head in my hands for a moment, rubbing my eyes. Dwelling on my recent past always made me edgy and gave me a headache, but any time I was alone, I couldn't help it. It had disturbed me a lot when it was happening and it still did to some extent. At least Inuyasha hadn't been able to contact me anymore. Not with my new cell phone number, new home address, new home phone number, and a new car (new in the sense that it was only just beginning its time under my ownership). Anything identifiable had been changed thanks to my father. I sighed, and placed the key back in the ignition and turned the switch. The engine sputtered to life, and a sighed. The cold weather was starting to affect the engine. I'd have to get everything checked soon.
I drove home in silence. There was nothing good playing on the radio, and I didn't have any CDs I wanted to hear at that particular moment. I noticed a car behind me that had been there for a while. Whoever was in the car had pulled out behind me at the store. The windows were darkly tinted, however, and I couldn't see in them. I pulled into the driveway, and after the car drove by and got out and carried in the groceries, locking my car door as I was headed towards the front door.
I sighed. "I'm becoming paranoid." I opened the door and stepped inside before closing and locking it back. Quietly, I put up the groceries, and walked up the steps to my room. I silently slipped my door shut and began to tidy up a bit. I sighed in my boredom at being home alone. I glanced over at my cordless phone and briefly entertained the idea of calling someone. I passed over that idea, however, and started to pick out some night clothes and go on to bed, when I heard something that completely changed my mind on the afore mentioned prospect. The sharp boom and resounding echoes of a rifle going off just outside my house followed immediately by the splintering of wood and shattering of glass. My heart jumped in my throat, and for a moment I was too terrified to move. My mind, however, quickly caught up with me and I lunged for my phone as quietly as I could.
I dialed 9-1-1. It seemed like an eternity before the dial clicked over.
"Hello, 9-1-1. What is your emergency?"
"I-I think someone's breaking into my house. It sounds like someone shot out the door or a window right outside my home."
"Alright, m'am. Please stay calm. We have our closets officers alerted to your situation and they should be at your home shortly."
I heard the crunch of glass under what must've boots and I stuttered worse than before. "Someone's coming… I have to go!" I whispered the last part urgently and clicked the off button. I crawled into my closet and shut the door as quietly as I could. I pushed the on button and dialed my mother, when she answered I was crying.
"Mom, someone's in the house," I whispered.
You always had to be right
And now you lost the only thing that ever made you feel alive
"Kikyou, stay calm, I be right there, okay? Where are you?"
"I'm hiding in my closet."
"Okay, just stay there, and stay quiet. I'm on my way."
I could hear the sound of her car starting over the receiver and I absent-mindedly wondered exactly how fast she must've run to already be in her car driving home.
"I'll stay on the phone with you, honey. If you don't want to say anything, just remember I'm here if you need to tell me anything, okay, dear?"
I muttered a weak 'yes,' but remained quiet. I heard my doorknob turn, and my door slowly creak open. The door closed right after that, and I heard more noise, signifying the person was still in my room. I could see the shadow of whoever was in my room, creeping underneath the illuminated part just beneath the closet doors, inching closer to my hiding spot. I closed my eyes tight, my breathing stopped momentarily. I remained motionless and the doors opened, and I was helpless to stop it.
Even if I tried to keep him out of the closet, he had a gun and could probably shoot through another one.
"Mom," I whispered, "I'm scared."
The doors opened with a creak, and I looked up into the face of the assailant and I know I must've paled.
"I—Inuyasha…"
"Kikyou… why wouldn't you return my calls?"
The heavy footfalls of many pairs of feet echoed as they stomped up the stairs. As they tried to come in the room, I noticed the door only budged the slightest. Inuyasha had tied the door shut with rope.
"Hello, whoever is in there, could you please come out of the room?"
"I'm afraid not." Inuyasha raised his voice to answer the commanding one outside the door, but remained calm.
I looked at the pistol in his hand, and then fearfully up at his face. It was the look I didn't want to see when I ran away from him in the beginning—regret, hopelessness, and defeat.
"Please don't do anything rash. Don't do anything you'll regret. If you could just come out, I'm sure we can work things out."
"I wanted to work things out, but she won't."
"I'm sure she'll be willing to talk and work something out, isn't that right, miss?"
My throat was all too dry, and my eyes all too wet. "Yes," I answered simply. I wanted to scream out 'I'll work anything out so long as you never come near me again!' but I didn't think that would go over so well.
He seemed to ponder this for a moment, and then held his hand out to me. I looked at his hand, then up at his face, before looking back at his hand. Very hesitantly, I put my hand in his, and he helped me out of the closet. I followed behind him slowly, one hand clasped loosely in his, and the other clutching the phone to my ear as if for dear life. My mother was still connected on the other line, and I needed her there if she couldn't be any closer. As we neared the door he stopped and looked back at me with sadness, and oddly, some sort of recognition. He pulled my hand up, and placed a kiss on my knuckles.
My eyes watered heavily, and I felt guilt. Oh, how I felt guilt! I had never meant for things to go so far, to get so out of hand… the tender gesture that had won over my speculation—the gesture once so endearing—scared me more than anything else had ever scared me in my life.
"I know you don't want me, Kikyou." He said sadly, and let my hand go.
Oh I'm the same old, same old stupid boy
"I told you I couldn't live without you… I know you can live without me, but… I don't want you to live with anyone other than me."
Turning, he leveled the pistol with my chest, and pulled the trigger.
Bang.
I felt a sharp, burning intensity pierce my flesh, and the warmth of blood seeping through my clothes and into the carpet as I fell backwards, the force of the deadly projectile knocking my balance into oblivion.
Darkness was beginning to surround me, but it seemed slow to come. I glanced at Inuyasha, and I could see the door bulging with the officers trying to get in. I saw one slip a knife in and began cutting the rope.
"I'm sorry… my love." Inuyasha apologized sadly, and placed the gun barrel to his temple, and pulled the trigger.
Bang.
With my last vision I saw blood splatter everywhere and Inuyasha collapse not far from me. He was reaching for me, and if I could have mustered the strength, I would've pulled away from his dying form.
I saw the last shreds of the rope being cut before the darkness completely encompassed me, and all I could hear was silence.
It took awhile for her to figure out she could run
But when she did, she was long gone, long gone
A/U: This is a one-shot songfic dedicated to Katie N. K. who was murder by her ex-boyfriend on January 16, 2007. The song is "Stupid Boy" as sung by Keith Urban.
