"Is there a third option? 'Cause both of you kind of make me want to kill myself."
Regina just cleared her throat with a stern and pointed, "Miss Swan."
"What?" Emma groaned in exasperation, turning around. "It's true."
"Miss. Swan," Regina repeated. Patience was obviously needed, the blonde clear inherited some of the two idiots' brain density.
Emma rose her eyebrows, looking at her expectantly. What rant would come this time?
Regina gave it a few moments, but Emma was being remarkably thick. "Oh for heaven's sake, must I spell it out? Draw you a picture perhaps?"
"...Are we talking about maps now? 'Cause we tried that already."
Why did she have to be so infuriatingly, endearingly stupid? With the help of some magic, because Sharpies were not something just found lying around in Neverland, in red lettering 'THIRD' was written on Regina's right hand, 'OPTION' was written on her left. She held her hands up in Emma's plain view.
Emma slapped herself on the forehead. "God damn it woman, you should have said something."
Hook and Neal sent shocked glares Regina's way, then at each other.
"But -"
"Wait -"
"I believe the lady has spoken." Regina pointed at Neal. "Abandoner." She pointed at Hook. "Filthy kidnapping pirate, who, by the way Neal, slept with your mother." She pointed at herself. "Mother of our son. Royalty. Did you really think either of you stood a chance?"
Snow laughed, because as ridiculous as everything was, she for once was on Regina's side of the fence. "And she's prettier than you."
Emma gave her an odd look. "Thanks, Mom?" She grabbed Regina's hand, whispered something to her, and they disappeared in a swirl of purple smoke.
