A/N
heei guys so this is my first story and i really hope you like it! Post a review of what you think or what you want to happen next! I would love to hear what you guys think! Ohh and a hugeee thanks to my beta she is wonderful!
disclaimer: i do not own vampire academy the wonderful Richelle Mead does.
Chapter 1
RPOV
I lay here in my bed, finally having some time for myself. No family, no parents, no annoying little brother, just me and my thoughts. These are the moments when I break down, the moment every rational thought leaves my mind. Its the moment when I am the most vulnerable. The moment all the bad things that have happened, that could happen, get to me. The moment it all gets too much. I'm not thinking straight. I am not happy, not really.
They say I am but they dont know the real me. I'm good a hiding that from everyone. I hid because I was afraid to be judged. They think I am the strong one but Im not, not the real me anyway. I just hide that person behind an attitude. They tell me it will be okay but what if it won't? What if I go crazy in the meantime? There was only one person who knew how I really felt but now that she is gone too, I feel like I have lost everything in my life. I was crying hysterically by now and slowly I started to fade into the darkness.
I woke up to my phone playing the song 'Princess of China' by Coldplay. Its one of my favourite songs and I love it! Although it makes me cry most of the time. It was 6.30, the sun was up and so should I be, if I wanted to be in time for my first day of school after the summer vacation. I always hated school, it was just because I was never good in the subjects I took. But since I had a big fight with my best friend, school only became that much worse.
She thought it was okay to steal my boyfriend Jessie from me. She told him I was still a virgin and he immediately broke up with me and went out with Avery, becoming new 'lover'. Is it so wrong to wait for the right guy?
I guess it is by their standards. So this summer, in just a few weeks I lost my best friend and boyfriend. Great!
My thoughts were interrupted by my mom, who suddenly came barging in my room.
"Rosemarie! Get up! You don't want to be late for school!" She yelled. "Okay mom, I'm coming!" I replied.
As soon as Janine leaves my room I'm starting climbing out of bed. I grab my jeans and a thin sweater.
I never wear 'tight' clothes because of I'm scared of what people say about my body. I know I have curves in all the right places but that's the only reason that guys want to go out with me. I walk to the bathroom to brush my teeth and to put on a touch of makeup. When I look in the mirror, all I see is a broken girl. A broken girl who puts on a mask every time she walks out of her room or as she calls it her safe little bubble.
I look deep in the mirror again and see red irritated spots around my eyes, all the crying I did last night have left its mark. Sighing I brush my teeth and put on some mascara, I try to cover the irritated spots with some concealer. Looking in the mirror I say to myself "You're Rose Hathaway. This is your last year of high school. You are almost 18, an adult…. you can do this."
Knowing it wouldn't help, I shrugged my shoulders and walked back to my room so I could pack my bag and headdownstairs.
When I walked into the kitchen my brother was already eating his breakfast.
"Hey little flower! Ready for school?" he asked.
"Adrian, you know I hate school stop rubbing it in my face!" I yelled at him.
"Wow, someone has a bad temper today." He really wasn't improving my mood. "Oh shut up Adrian."
Meet my brother Adrian we are twins, don't ask me how because we are completely different.
He has reddish brown hair and green eyes just like our mom but he is built just like my dad, tall and skinny.
I'm the opposite. Just like my dad, I have his dark brown hair and brown eyes but then the rest of me is short with curves, something my mom is proud of but I don't feel the same.
Adrian and I are in the same class in school. He is the popular one always surrounded by girls, while I am the quiet one that sits and blends into background. I have no friends, well not anymore.
I'm always scared to get judged, always scared for not being good enough. I am different.
My thoughts were once again interrupted be my mom. There they go, talking about me like im not even there. "Adrian, you have to take Rose with you to school, I don't have the time to give her a ride this morning."
Adrians eyes shot open wide and his jaw almost hit the ground "But mom, its not cool to be seen with the school freak!" He exclaimed.
"Adrian! Be nice, don't speak about your sister like that! And I don't care if it is not cool, she is your sister and you are taking her to school!" She said.
He mumbled his protest, grabbed the car keys and walked out the door. I stood up to follow him when my mom came over to me. "Rosemarie, why don't you try to make some new friends? It's a new school year, try something different"
I looked everywhere but straight at her before responding "Because no one wants to be friends with the school freak mom,that's why" I said angrily and walked past her to grab my bag I had placed in the hallway.
When I walked outside I saw that Adrian was already gone. 'Just great, thanks alot Adrian' I murmured to myself, so now I had to hurry to school, hopefully I would be on time.
After 20 minutes of walking I finally arrived at school. Covered in sweat because it was about 32 degrees outside. When I entered the school doors, I tried to prepare for hell to start again...
