A/N: Through this wonderful episode, we learned so much about Jane and added a lot to the lore of these characters. This will always be one of my favorites. So now, I've added to it with a bit of silliness and fluff, and perhaps a sharp little edge here and there. I hope you enjoy it.
Episode Tag: Bloodshot, 1x16
The rest of the team began trickling in as Jane sat back on his couch, sipping his first correctly prepared cup of tea in days. They were pleasantly surprised when they realized their consultant could see again, and after extending congratulations in their various manners—Van Pelt giving Jane an impulsive hug, Rigsby making a joke; Cho nodding his appreciation—they sat down at their desks and booted up their computers. It was always a relief when things went back to normal.
"Sorry about your car, Grace," Rigsby was saying. "That's gonna be a nice hit to your insurance premiums."
Van Pelt flushed a little and glanced at Jane. "The CBI is covering it. It happened in the line of duty."
Jane couldn't help his small grin despite the horror of his experiment in blind driving and nearly being shot in the process.
"How's your head, Rigsby?" Jane asked.
"Not in as bad a shape as Grace's SUV," he said. "But yeah, I've a bit of a headache this morning."
"Sorry," Grace muttered under her breath. She couldn't help feeling that all of this was her fault, even though Jane's past occupation was at the very heart of it.
"Don't be too hard on yourself, Grace," said Jane. "Love can be blind, as they say."
"It wasn't exactly love," she protested, purposefully avoiding looking at Rigsby. "We'd just gone out a few times."
"All kinds of blindness," Cho said.
"That's deep," said Rigsby, his tone slightly mocking. Cho, unoffended, merely shrugged.
"Cho's quite right," said Jane. "One can be blind as a bat, as was I. The blind can lead the blind. You can rob someone blind, or, on the flip side, have blind luck."
"You can turn a blind eye or have a blind date," suggested Van Pelt, getting into the game.
"You can have a blind spot or be blinded by the light," added Rigsby.
"'In the country of the blind, the one-eyed man is king,'" Cho opined, not even looking up from his e-mail.
Jane grinned. "Good one, Cho. And, one of my favorites: 'there are none so blind as those who will not see.'" They were quiet after that one, each recalling how that particular expression had applied in their own lives.
"She blinded me with science," said Rigsby breaking the profound silence, at which Van Pelt laughed aloud.
At that moment, Lisbon walked through the bullpen. All joking stopped and the team (except for Jane, of course) pretended to be working diligently. Jane smiled at her, happier than he wanted to admit to be able to look upon her familiar face again.
"We were just having a very deep conversation, Lisbon," Jane said drinking the last drop of his perfect tea. He set his empty cup and saucer at his feet.
"Oh, really?" Lisbon said skeptically, looking around at her seemingly focused team.
"Yes. Thanks to Cho, we were discussing idiomatic blindness." He gestured to himself. "I was blind…but now I see. Van Pelt was blind to Dan's deception, and Rigsby apparently has vision issues with female scientists. I believe it's to you, Lisbon…"
Her brow furrowed as she tried to fully comprehend the strange conversation she'd stumbled into. Idioms? In the bullpen?
"Blind as a—"
"Already got that one. Try again."
She gave Jane a dirty look.
"Go on a blind—"
"Meh. You're not even trying," Jane said mildly. "Although it's interesting you should think of dating…"
"Up a blind alley?" She tried, choosing to ignore his little jab at her personal life.
Jane nodded in appreciation.
"No one's said that one," said Van Pelt encouragingly.
Jane patted his couch. "Why don't you sit down, Lisbon. You think better when you're sitting."
"You don't think I can think on my feet?" she asked in annoyance, but sat anyway.
"Thinking…Now, that's a whole new set of idioms…"
Lisbon sighed, feeling on the spot, then her eyes widened mischievously at a sudden thought. She looked at Jane suspiciously. "I know one: blind man's bluff."
"Lisbon—"
"Yeah. You know what, Jane, I wouldn't put it past you to have been faking some of that blindness, you know, just to look even more impressive that you could solve a case blind."
Van Pelt gasped. "My car…"
Jane held up his hands defensively. "No, Grace, I assure you, I would not have risked either life or Jeep to make myself look good."
"Because that would be seriously messed up, Jane," said Rigsby, for he could completely see the consultant playing such a deranged game with them. He rubbed the back of his head gingerly.
Cho had caught a glimpse of Lisbon's brief spark of amusement and his lips formed a little smile. It was fun to see someone screwing with Jane for a change.
"You should be ashamed of yourself, Lisbon. Riling them up like this," Jane admonished. He'd seen the mischief in her eyes too. "Not that solving a case blind wasn't impressive, mind you. I'm just hurt you would think I would stoop to that level of subterfuge…"
"Oh, I've seen you do worse, Jane. And certainly your past subterfuge could go directly to what happened here the last few days."
He shrugged. "I guess I can't argue with that one. But I did not fake my blindness, I promise you. There's nothing more frightening than being suddenly unable to see. It would be like if you couldn't shoot a gun anymore. Or use your handcuffs. Or wear those imposing high-heeled boots of yours."
Rigsby stifled a laugh, but not very successfully. Lisbon shot him a look that sobered him right away.
"You know what, Jane? I think I liked you better when you were blind. We didn't have to hide all the dirty looks and rolled eyes you invite all the time." She rose to her feet. "You guys get back to work. We don't have time for stupid word games."
She felt the eyes of her astonished team as she stalked out of the bullpen and headed for her office, shutting herself inside. Not a minute later, Jane was reopening her glass door without even knocking.
"Nice, Lisbon," he said. "Now everyone's mad that I upset the boss as well as getting a man blown up and totalling Van Pelt's car. Thanks for that."
"Well, you deserve it for scaring the hell out of me by getting yourself blinded in the first place, then there was the little matter of calling me Rigsby."
He grinned appreciatively. "Aww…nicely played. And for the record, I am sorry. Karma has it out for me, it would seem. I'm forever destined to be bitten in the ass by the sins of my past."
Lisbon looked immediately contrite. "You aren't to blame for what other people do, Jane." Of course, she didn't just mean James Medina's murder or Dan Hollenbeck's revenge plot.
"If only that were so."
"Look, I'll go tell the team I was just messing with you, to cut you some slack. You were blind, after all; that should be punishment enough…"
He chuckled now at how guilty she felt for merely dishing out a little of what he gave to the team on a daily basis.
"Jane," she began, eyes narrowing dangerously.
"Like stealing acorns from a blind pig," he said with a grin.
"Get the hell out of my office before you lose another sense, like maybe your sense of smell." She fisted her hand threateningly.
He backed out of her office. "I'm going. I'm going. Always nice seeing you, Lisbon." And he shot her his prizewinning smile.
As the door shut with a gentle click behind him, Lisbon shook her head, so grateful that all his senses were once again intact.
"It's very nice to be seen," she said softly to herself.
A/N: You like? Please sign in and let me know. Also, I posted the next chapter of "Scarlet Woman" yesterday, but there were some problems with the site and some people didn't get chapter alerts. So if you've been waiting for an update, please just click on my name and find that fic. Thanks for reading!
As for my next season 1 tag, I'm still open for suggestions…
