Laura Evans
1-4-2001
English

Gremlin Bash 2001
By, Insane Rei

Before the story :


[Laura walks out on stage] [looks at reader]

Laura: Ummmmmm, Hello. I am the author of this parody-

Audience: BOOOO!!!!!!!!!

Laura: [towers high] HEY!!! I'M TALKING!!!!!!!!!!!!

Audience: [suddenly goes silent]

Laura: THANK U!! [clears through] any way, like I was saying, I'm Laura Evans, the author. Better known as Insane Rei.

Person in Audience: YEAH!! Your crazy!!

[Laura throws rock at person and it hits him in the head]

Person in Audience: OUCH!! [falls down]

Laura: ok, that's better. [pauses] any way, I wrote this parody of the Gremlin ep from the old Black and white ep of Twilight Zone : terror at 20,000 feet (or some thing like that) because I REALLY hated that ep and thought the Simson's Parody of it was MUCH better! (and it was shorter too!)

Another Person in Audience: SHOW THE DAM THING ALREADY!

[Laura glars at the person. She looks over at a man standing next to the door and nods. The man then picks up the person in the Audience and throws her out the window.] [oh did I tell u this was on the 34,624,746,783,568,3578 floor of the building?]

Laura: ANY WAY, me and my mopm where talking about WHO should be casted in a remake of this ep. We decided Blarp from the Lost In Space movie should be the gremlin and that Gery Oldmen should play the guy that sees the Gremlin. (has any one here seen the Professional? He was GREAT in that movie!!) any way, before I make every one go to sleep-

Person in Audience: TOO LATE!

Laura: SHUT UP!!! [throws another rock at him] any way, before I throw another rock at another person, ON WITH THE SHOW!!

Gremlin Bash 2001! ^_^
By, Insane Rei

KEY:

BOB : Gery Oldmen As the guy from the Professional

Nameless Actresses + Actors : Some nameless actresses + actors from any movie u want

Gremlin : young Blarp from the Lost In Space movie remake


[Lets skip the beginning and just say EVERY one is in there sets on the air plan]

Namless actress: damit, why do these sets have to be so close to each other?

BOB: I don't care! [takes a pill he had just pilled out from his poket]

Namless Actress: well fine! Gimme some of those! [takes a pill from the box]

[plan takes off]

BOB: damit, I hate flying!

Namless Actress: Yeah, that's why you where in the nut house before we got on the flight, remember?

BOB: No, I was in jail for being a drug dealer!

Namless actress: Oh yeah……… Oh well. I'm going to sleep! [Curls up in seat and falls asleep]

[BOB shrugs and looks out the window. As he looks he sees a small money like thing jumping around the plans wings.]

BOB: [looks at box he's holding] maybe I shoulder stop taking these things………….

[BOB looks back up at the monkey thing who is plastered on the window at this point.]

BOB: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!

Namless Actress 2: [walks over to BOB calmly and asks VERY calmly] What is it sir?

BOB: [looks at nameless actress 2.] there, there, there……… [points at window]

Nameless actress: [looks out side window and sees nothing] what is it sir? Do you not want to sit next to the emergency exit?

[BOB looks at the door and realizes he WAS sitting at the emergency exit. He shrugs and then looks back at nameless actress 2]

BOB: no, no I'm fine with that! BUT, there was a Gremlin RIGHT there on the window! [points out side]

Nameless Actress 2: Excuse me sir, but we don't like it when people act out that episode of the twilight zone. [walks away]

BOB: BUT I wasn't acting that scene out!!

Nameless actress 2: yeah, yeah, sure. [walks off]

Nameless Actress: [finally wakes up] what the hell is your problem now, BOB?

BOB: Don't call me BOB!

Nameless actress: but that's your name!

BOB: I don't care! I don't like it!

Nameless actress: what ever………. [clears throat] any way, like I was say, what the F*** is your problem?!

BOB: nothing, I just saw a Gremlin.

Nameless actress: oh, is that all? Ok. [goes back to sleep]

[BOB looks around the plane for a few minutes. Looking up and down and side to side, and back and forth……you get the point. Ether way, he grew board quickly and decide to look out the window.]

BOB: OH MY GOD!

Nameless Actress: what? What? [looks out window] OH MY!

Nameless actress 2: [walks over] What the F***?!!

[camera pans over to what every one is looking at and every one sees a studio wall.]
[when you look closely you see the shadow of some thing.]
[opps………. They forgot to put the blue screen there.]

Nameless actress 1+ 2: OH MY!

BOB: WHAT ARE WE TO DO??? The hill that was there a few minutes ago is GONE!!! THE gremlin ate it I Tell you!!!!

[Nameless actress 2 gets board and walks away and nameless actress goes alseep]

BOB: HEY!! doesn't any one belive me?!!

Every one: NO!!!

BOB: oh……………

[Bob shrugs and goes back to looking at the sealing.]

BOB: [sings really off tune] and you don't seam to understand………….. and shame you seamed an honest man…….and all the fears you hold soooooo dear………….. will turn to whisper in your eaaaaar!!!!!!

[Person sitting behind him and hits him over the head.]

Person: SHUT UP!! I'M TRYING TO SLEEP!!

BOB: [rubs head] ouch………….

[BOB gives up on singing and continues to looks around. He decides to look at the pretty scenery out side, ever though the airplane wing would be covering more than half of it.]
[BOB looks out side and sees monkey thing ripping a piece of the wing off.]

BOB: [shrugs] ok….. gremlin destroying airplane……… [looks back inside.]

[BOB sits there looking at his hands for a VERY long time (at least 10 minutes) before realising what he had just saw and looks back out side so quickly you'd be surprise his head didn't spin off. ]
[when he looks most of the metal has been ripped off]

BOB: WHAT THE F*** IS THAT MONKEY THING DOING???!!!! HELP!! HELP!!! THERE'S A GREMLIN!!!!!!

Namless Actress 2: [walks over calmly and asks calmly] what is it sir?

BOB: DID YOU HEAR ME THE FIRST TIME?!!! I SAID THERE IS A GREMLIN OUT THERE!!! [points out side the window]

Nameless actress 2: [looks out the window] I don't see any thing sir. It must be your imagination sir.

BOB: but it's NOT!! I mean, look at all that missing metal on the wing!

Nameless Actress 2: [looks] so?

BOB: so……….? WHAT DO YOU MEAN "SO" ?!!!!!!!!

Nameless Actress: I mean, what's the problem?

Person: hey, can I have a glass of water?

Nameless actress: of course sir. [walks off to get a glass of water for the person.]

BOB: [rolls eyes and looks back out side and see the Gremlin] OH FOR GODS SAKE!! Do you only appear whe no one other than my self are looking?!

[the gremlin looks up at BOB.]

Gremlin: blarp! [nods and smiles before going back to work on the airplane wing.]

BOB: dam it!

[BOB looks over at another persons seat and sees two hand guns sitting there. He smiles to him self and jumps up out of the seat and grabbed the guns.]
[no one stops him or seams to care. So, he takes out his small box and takes one of the pills in it.]

BOB: HAHAHAHAHA!!!! [pauses] I've heard that music before! Let's turn up the volume!!!!

[BOB starts shooting the guns in the tune to Moonlight Sonata 3ed movement.]
[NOTE : if u would like to hear this song, I can bring it in! ^_^]

BOB: dadededadededade!dadededadededade! dadedadededededededadedade!!

[BOB continues shooting to the tune of Moonlight Sonata 3ed movement.]
[BOB then runs out of bullets.]

BOB: AWWWWWW F***!!!!

[BOB looks around and notices that he has killed every one OTHER THAN the gremlin. This includes the pilot who had walked out to see what was going on.]

BOB: SHIT! SHIT! SHIT! SHIT!!!!!!!

Laura: After this the airplane crashed landed right next to a small, small, small island. The only people to live through this was BOB and Blarp, our gremlin.

[next scene: BOB and the gremlin are siting next to a tree splitting BOB's pill like things.]

BOB: yeah, you and me, we can survive together on this island! You and me! [nods happily. He had just finished half of his drugs………]

Gremlin: blarp, blarp! [looks around] Blarp, blarp, blarp!

BOB: what's that girl? Timmy is trapped in the well?!

Grelim: [hits him over the head]

BOB: OH!! Your saying we need to get food, right?

Gremlin: [nods] blarp!

BOB: ok then! I'll get food! [walks off to get food]

[next scene: BOB is at a camp fire and the gremlin is no where to be seen. We then notice some thing about the same size as Blarp is cooking over the fire.]

BOB: [says to now cooking blarp] HEY, I said I'd get food. I NEVER said for US!

Laura: THE END!

Person in Audience: thank god!!!

Laura: HEY!! I HEARD THAT!!!!!!

[starts running after the person with an axe]

Person in Audience: AHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! [runs for dear life]

Laura: I'M GONNA GET YOU!!! MWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!!!!!!!


The REAL End