A/N: I do not own 7th Heaven or any of the characters from the show. I am borrowing them for my own amusement. I hope you enjoy this story.

Chapter 1 Ruthie's Life

My dad died a year after I graduated high school. We had returned home from our little road trip after three months. Lucy and Kevin took the job in Crossroads. T-Bone and I broke up about six months before dad died. Simon got married about the same time I broke up with T-Bone. Matt and Sarah moved back to Glen Oak just after Dad died. Mary and Carlos had moved to Glen Oak just a couple weeks before Dad died. Simon and his wife Rebecca moved into Kevin and Lucy's old house after they married. David and Sam are in high school now. They were homeschooled until high school and then went back to public school to allow them social interactions that they would otherwise miss out on.

So basically we all ended up back in Glen Oak. As for our former houseguests that became extended family? Well we heard from Robbie a few years ago and he is happily married to a woman named Marissa and they still live in Florida. Mac and Margret got married while on our road trip. Dad gave Margret away and Lucy was the minister. It was a beautiful moment on our trip. Martin had met up with us that weekend because Mac invited him to be his best man and Jane was the maid of honor. Speaking of Jane she reconciled with George Jackson Grayson better known to my family as Uncle George. When he returned from his tour of duty they remarried and it made Grandma Ruth and the Colonel very happy. T-Bone found love during his college years and married last summer to a great woman named Holly. He and his dad did finally have paternity tests done about a year after we met Al. Both are doing great and keep in touch with our family often. I guess this only leaves Martin. I know the rest of the family has kept in touch with him but while I was in college I lost touch with him. From what I have been told Martin is the bookkeeper for his Dad's business and is single. He played in the minor leagues and just as he was about to make the majors he suffered a bad arm injury that kept him from continuing his career. He at that point was thankful that my dad had insisted on him going to college. When Dad died Martin was the first person to be there for all of us but most especially me.

I remember that night as each Camden took to the phones to spread the word to the ones we truly felt needed to know. Lucy called the deacons and asked that they spread the word though the church community. Word spread fast with eleven people making phone calls. Simon was the one to call Martin's cell and within ten minutes Martin was at the back door. When Matt opened it Martin asked for me. The moment he spotted me trying to get through a conversation with some friend of the family he wrapped his arms around me and took the phone. He took over the explanation while he held me. At the funeral Mom asked Martin to sit with us and be my support. Actually we had all our former houseguests/extended family with us at the funeral. Martin held me tight through it all until I got up to sing. It had been both a sad and happy day. Dad had lived his life in such a way that he had so many there to mourn him but at the end of the services our family decided it was enough mourning for all so we asked Sandy, who had been our minister for the funeral, to make an announcement. "Please join the Camden family in a joyous party to celebrate Reverend Eric Camden's life. The family requests no more mourning during the party but rather only happiness. The party will take place in the church hall." That worked and everyone joined in the joyous celebration.

When I could no longer hold it together I excused myself and went to one of the Sunday school rooms where Martin followed me to. He held me and his warmth mixed with his delicious smell made me feel so safe that I couldn't feel anything but happy again. But that was like ten years ago and after that day Martin and I pretty much didn't talk again. However I know in my heart if I need him he will be there for me.

I am now 28 years old and have just finished becoming a psychiatrist and now have an office next door to Sarah's office. She is a general doctor. Matt is on the other side of me and he is an OB-GYN. We share a waiting room. I am currently living with my Mom and the twins but am hoping to move out in the next couple months. I actually rent the garage apartment. It is really nice having almost all my siblings back in Glen Oak again. Right now I am waiting at a table at Pete's Pizza for the rest of my siblings to arrive.

"Hey Ruthie." I hear Mary call as she and Carlos arrive.

"Where are the kids?" I ask.

"Mom and Mr. Brewer are babysitting for us tonight." Carlos explains.

"Martin's dad?" I ask.

"Yeah he thought it was the least he could do for our family taking in Martin and helping him with the baby situation." Mary explains and I just nod as Lucy arrives.

Before I know it the entire crew is seated around the table. There are seven of us kids and four in-laws. All the kids are with other family or babysitters. Apparently Sandy and Jonathan are watching Lucy's two kids. Sarah and Matt's four are with her parents. Simon and Rebecca's three are with Rebecca's parents who are visiting this week. Mary and Carlos five kids are as they said with my mom and Mr. Brewer.

Matt as usual is the one to call our family 'meeting' to order. Mary reads off what happened at the last family 'meeting' before Matt calls for any new business.

"I have two new pieces of business as we like to call all our life events these days." Lucy says with a snort of laughter.

"I am waiting on pins and needles." I say with sarcasm and I get a glare from all of them. "Oh you were all thinking it too. The good reverend is always so boring with her news." They don't get how hard it is for me to come to these get togethers when they bring their spouses.

She ignores me and goes on. "I am moving back to Glen Oak and taking over the church again. Sandy has been given a job in another town closer to where Jonathan's work is taking him. My second piece of news is that I am pregnant again." At that last statement we all sit in stunned silence.

As usual I am the first to recover. "I always did think you were a lot like mom." I say and we all laugh at that. "But then again you were a lot like Dad too. You got the best of them both Luce." I say and they all quickly agree.

After several more pieces of news about things going on in their own lives much of which is stale old news really I hear a piece of information that catches my attention. "Martin is back for good. He tried living in another town away from here but his dad and Sandy's dad both thought it would be better if he kept closer to help them go over the books more frequently than once a month." Simon says. "He is looking for a house in the neighborhood but Mom and Mr. Brewer are thinking that maybe when Ruthie moves out he could use the garage apartment. Mom could use the rent to help with the bills and once Ruthie moves they will still need that income to help pay the bills."

"I am not moving until I find a place just so Martin can have a place to live!" I say in a pissed off tone.

"Well why couldn't you move into the house until you find a place? I mean that would allow both you and Martin to have a place to live for the time being. Martin's dad doesn't have extra space right now." Mary asks.

"Why can't he move in the house with Mom and the boys until I find something?" I ask in a huff.

"He could but do you really want him up in your old bedroom?" Lucy questions.

"Why not?" I say with a shrug which causes my two older sisters to laugh at me. "Oh you two did something to that room didn't you? Something that might embarrass me if I still liked Martin right?" I say putting two and two together.

"No but we did see the room earlier today and it looks like while he was playing ball someone kept pretty good tabs on him." Mary says with a laugh.

I want to scream at them but instead I just laugh at them as I get up throw some money on the table. "Well guess I better go since I have work to do tonight because obviously Martin is moving back to Hotel Camden no matter what I say."

I am out the door and in my car before any of them can even comprehend what just happened. I drive for about an hour to clear my head before I drive home. I see that the meeting must still be going as the twins aren't home so I go in the house to find Mr. Brewer, Martin, Mr. Jamison, and my mom watching five very active children. "Hi mom don't worry I am moving my stuff from the apartment to the attic tonight so that you can move your buddy Martin back into the garage apartment. I refuse to pay rent to live in the house though but I will be out by the end of the week anyway so whatever." I say in a tone that tells her why I am angry.

"Ruthie I didn't ask anyone to tell you about the idea as it was just an idea we were thinking about but wanted to discuss it with both Martin and you before a decision was made." Mom says.

"Actually if Ruthie isn't ready to move out of the apartment I can move into the attic for now. I am willing to pay rent either place." Martin says.

"I would still pay my rent if I can keep the garage apartment for another two months. I have a line on a place but it will be another two months before I can get into it." I tell my mom.

"Does that work for you Annie?" Mr. Brewer asks.

"Perfect! Now Ruthie will you get the rest of your things from the attic tonight so that Martin can move in tomorrow?"

"I can. He could move in tonight if he is ready. When I get done I will help with the kids so the guys can get his stuff." I say not wanting to make Martin feel unwanted.

Martin gets up and comes to me. He wraps me in his strong embrace and I wrap my arms around him burying my head in his chest. I remember the night he told me about Sandy and the baby. I remember how he let me hit him and tell him I hated him then he held me and told me he hated himself too. God I miss our old relationship before we both were forced to grow up because of one mistake.

"I think we need to talk as soon as possible." He whispers in my ear.

"How about after we get everything moved you come over to the garage apartment for some cookies and milk?" I whisper back and he nods as I finally break the hug. "I will be finished upstairs in about twenty minutes Mom." I say out loud as I head toward the stairs. "Good seeing you gentlemen again." I say as Martin starts back to the couch.

"Could Martin maybe help you with moving the stuff?" Mr. Brewer asks.

"No I need to do this myself but thank you for asking." I say as I reach the stairs. I run up the stairs all the way to the attic where I turn on some music and start the process of packing the rest. I am just about done when I hear cars pulling up outside. I count them first to pull in is probably Sam and David. Next would be Mary and Carlos coming to get their kids. A few minutes pass before Kevin and Lucy arrive after picking up Savannah and Christopher. Christopher is named after Ben and Kevin's father. Finally I hear Matt and Sarah pull up at about the same time as I hear Simon and Rebecca come through the back gate.

"Can I come in?" I hear Martin's voice from the doorway.

"It is may I come in and yes you may." I say and we both laugh because we know once a Camden always a Camden.

He walks in and looks at the four boxes I have packed. "Is this everything?" He asks softly as he wraps his arms around me again.

"Yes this is everything." I say again enjoying his nearness. "I would take it down but the others just arrived and I am not ready to deal with them."

"I understand and feel the same so I came up when they came in the driveway."

"Lucy and Kevin are staying here for the night." I stated.

"I know but I figured I could either wait until tomorrow to move in or I could crash the moment I was moved in. Besides the rest have to go home soon right?"

"You would think but since it is Friday night I doubt they will." I say just as I hear a knock on the door. I look up and see Mom.

"Hey Ruthie the others wanted to talk to you before they head home." She says softly.

"I will be down in a couple minutes." I say. "Keep them in the living room so Martin can move my stuff out through the kitchen without having to put up with them."

"Alright I will do my best." She says and I know she will succeed.

The moment she is gone I look up at Martin and I realize I never truly was over him. "I will help you carry them out to the back porch then I am going to deal with my sibs as you take them to the apartment. Is that alright?" I ask him.

"That is great can I hang out there until they leave for the night?"

"Sure I will come over and get you so we can move your stuff tonight." I tell him before kissing his cheek and grabbing the two smaller boxes. He grabs the two bigger boxes and we head down the back stairs through the kitchen out onto the back porch then into the garage where I set the two boxes I am carrying down on my car. "I will be back as soon as possible." I say and he nods. I take a deep breath and head back in the house. I go into the living room. "I don't want to hear it from any of you. I am sick of the meetings when all four of you," I say pointing to Mary, Simon, Lucy, and Matt. "Have to bring your spouses and rub it in my face that unlike you I have yet to find the love of my life." I say as I see Mr. Brewer and Mr. Jamison heading out the front door.

"Wait that is why you always get so upset and storm out early from our family dinners?" Lucy asks.

"Yes pretty much that is the reason. That and the fact that none of you listened to me when I said I was trying to find a home. You all laughed me off when I said to let me know if you knew of a place. It hurt my feelings to have you all laughing at me." I say and I see the guilty looks.

"I am sorry Ruthie I just never thought you would want to move this soon. You are still getting established in your practice and I know that is a lot to deal with in and of itself." Matt says then adds, "I guess I shouldn't be surprised because you always were the strongest of us when it came to handling changes with the exception of the twins." At that we all laugh.

"Yeah well that was Simon's fault he made me feel like I would be forgotten." I say and glare at Simon.

This gets the group to laugh again and soon they are hugging me good night while apologizing for making me feel like they are rubbing it in my face that they found someone early in life while I have waited. After Matt, Sarah, Mary and Carlos take their leave Lucy speaks up. "Ruthie maybe you too found your love early in live but it wasn't the right time then for either of you."

"Maybe," I say quietly as Simon and Rebecca head toward the kitchen to go home.

"We will talk more tomorrow alright Ruthie but for tonight I am tired." Lucy says before Kevin and Lucy say their goodnights to me.

Once they are gone Sam and David hug me and say goodnight. "Don't worry Ruthie some wonderful guy will soon be asking you to marry him." David tells me and for some reason it makes me feel better to hear him say this.

"I know dear but thank you for saying so. How is your girlfriend Jessica?" I ask and he tells me she is good and that they are trying to figure out which college they want to visit this year. Apparently something none of us other Camden kids did was take advantage of the college visits while in high school. Our school allowed you to take one day a year for the first three years and two days in your senior year to go check out colleges you might be interested in. You could actually use all five days in one year if you didn't go during the first three years. Anyway David and his girlfriend Jessica started doing their visits in their freshman year and now in their senior year they have visited two in state schools and one out of state school. They are planning to visit one more out of state school and will use the two days together so like Thursday and Friday or Friday and Monday to visit the college with our mom as Jessica's mom wants nothing to do with Jessica's education after high school. David goes to bed a few minutes later. "So Sam any new girlfriends?" I ask my remaining brother.

"No I am tired of dating around. Besides I am busy preparing for college. I have two college visits this month and one next month then I have used up my college visit days." Sam explains.

I remember him going to do a college visit at Simon's alma mater in his sophomore year. Simon went with him and they made a big weekend of it. Sam plays basketball like Mary did. David is a baseball player. I love seeing their different personalities and their different passions coming through now. We talk a few more minutes before he says he wants to go to bed. We say our goodnights then I go to the kitchen to find Mom sitting alone.

"Martin popped in a few minutes ago and said he saw the cars leave so he was going to go bring his stuff over to the garage until everyone else was in bed." Mom tells me.

I grab a cup of tea and sit down with my mom to chat. "I love living here mom but I feel a bit embarrassed to tell guys I still live with my mom sort of. They just don't get it."

"The right man won't care but I do understand why it is hard for you." She says.

"True the right man won't care and probably in fact will admire how close this family is like Kevin did with Lucy. The way Carlos and Sarah do for Matt and Mary and the way Rebecca does for Simon. They all love the closeness this family has. Do you think David and Jessica will last?" I ask my mom.

"Oddly I think David found his perfect partner in his freshman year of high school but time will tell."

"You miss Dad more everyday don't you?" I say softly.

"Yes I do. I never dreamed we would loss him that soon."

"I didn't either but God needed him more than we did I guess." This makes Mom smile.

"You are so right Ruthie. When did you get to be the smartest one in the family?" She teases me and we laugh.

"Not smartest but pretty close. I guess I better get out there and help Martin get moved in. We are then going to have a late night chat in my apartment if that is ok." I say to my mom.

"That is fine honey but remember we have that retreat at church tomorrow so not too late ok?"

"I promise Mom I will send him in by 2 am." I tease her and she just laughs.

"That is fine. Night Ruthie just keep the noise down please as I am going to be getting my beauty sleep."

I hug her good night then go out to the garage to find Martin with about ten boxes around him. I move over to him and grab a couple boxes without a word. He grabs a couple and we move them into the kitchen of Mom's house. Then we do this again with four more boxes. On the last trip we each take one box. Once we have the ten boxes in the kitchen we take them up two at a time to the second floor. When we come up to the second floor the second time we notice the boxes missing. I know my family must be helping us out so I don't think anything of it and I know Martin feels the same way. When we come up with the last two boxes there are no boxes sitting in the hall. I shrug it off and Martin leads the way up toward the attic but just as we start up three people come down the stairs. Kevin, Sam, and David smile at us. "Here let us take those two up for you. Annie made up the bed for the night and said you two wanted to visit for a while so I figure you will unpack tomorrow." Kevin says. "Now go visit and get caught up. David and Sam can take the last two up to the attic for you."

"Thank you Kevin, Sam and David for your help. Normally I would still take the rest of the boxes up myself but tonight I think I will accept the help because Ruthie and I have a lot to talk about." Martin says and we each hand one of the twins our box. "Night guys see you at breakfast."

"Night everyone I will also see you at breakfast before I leave for the retreat tomorrow. Lucy is going to the church retreat right?" I ask Kevin.

"Yes she, Sandy, Sarah, Mary, Rebecca, Jane, and Margret are all going tomorrow. I think they all lined up babysitters for tomorrow because Matt, Jonathan, Carlos, Simon, George, Mac, Mr. Brewer, Mr. Jamison, Sam, David, and myself are going out for a guy's day. Martin, would you care to join us? It would be from about 10 am until 3 pm so you would still have tons of time to unpack." Kevin explains.

"Sounds great what are we going to be doing tomorrow?" Martin asks.

"Not sure yet maybe a movie or might go bowling. Simon suggested a day at the gym. Carlos was thinking about us shopping for a cookout later in the day so we could have a grill and chill when the ladies got home. Your dad thought maybe fishing. Tons of ideas but nothing set yet. Got any ideas to add to the mix? Matt and I are arranging the plans tomorrow morning as soon as we all gather at 9 am to figure out what we want to do."

"They all sound great but what about maybe mixing activities we don't have to do just one. The new fun center in the next town over has mini-golf, go karts, batting cages, bowling alley, movie theater, and a lot more. Then we could hit the store on the way home and get the stuff for a grill and chill tomorrow night. Also tomorrow the center is doing a food drive. If you donate three cans of food you don't have to pay the five dollar fee to get in. They do it once a month on the first Saturday of the month." Martin tells us. "I take Aaron every time I am in the area. I guess it's been there for about a year now so not so new anymore but still new to me."

"Awesome I will suggest it in the morning. Good night Martin and Ruthie see you in morning." Kevin says then he hugs me and kisses my cheek.

Sam and David each come back down from taking the last two boxes upstairs. They each hug and kiss me goodnight. Then Martin and I walk back to my apartment where I pour us each a glass of milk then pull out a pack of cookies. We settle on my couch before we start talking.

"So what are you doing now Ruthie?" Martin asks as he dunks a cookie in the milk.

"I am a psychiatrist and my practice is in the same office as Sarah and Matt's offices. We share a waiting room." I explain and he seems to be listening intently to every word I am saying.

"Are you and T-Bone still together?" He asks. I stand up and show him my lower back where the tattoo has now been removed. "I guess that means you two broke up."

"Yes we broke up about six months before my father died. I paid to get both his tattoo and mine removed. His was a lot smaller and he didn't care if it stayed since it was just my initials however when he met Holly I insisted I pay to have it removed. She said she didn't care but either way I wanted my initials off him and his name off me." I explain.

"Do you ever plan to get another tattoo?" He asks.

"Oh I have another tattoo. Want to see it?" I ask him and he nods so I pull down the front of my shirt enough to expose a spot just above the left breasts. It is something my dad wrote me a couple months before he died. "It is my dad's writing." The tattoo says 'Follow your heart.' It was just a part of my dad's last note to me.

Martin has tears in his eyes then he lifts his shirt and shows me a spot on his side. There in a woman's cursive was the words 'Follow your heart.' "My mom once wrote me the same words in a letter that was given to me when I turned 21." I tear up at that. I set our milk glasses aside and wrap my arms around him. He pulls me close and holds me while we both cry missing our deceased parents. "I missed you so much Ruthie." He whispers against my ear.

"I missed you too Martin. I guess I never did fully get over you but at the time I needed to hurt you the way you hurt me." I finally tell him the truth.

"I know and I deserved it but a little part of my heart held out hope that you loved me still. I guess that is why I stayed around the area until your father passed away something told me I was needed."

"I always remember the way you held me the night my dad died or the way you let me hit you and tell you I hated you when I found out about your child." I tell him.

"I remember those moments all the time too. I hated myself for ever hurting you. Tonight when I first hugged you I knew those feelings I had for you back then were still as deep as before."

"Mine too are as deep as before if not deeper." I tell him.

He leans closer and before he can kiss me there is a knock on my door. "Who is it?" I call out.

"Ruthie it is me, Simon." My brother calls out.

"What do you need?" I say aggravated that he is bothering me.

"I wanted to know if you and I are alright after the way Martin got brought up tonight at dinner." Simon says.

Martin gives me a questioning look and I just shake my head before mouthing the word later. "Yes we are just fine and I will be ok. I just am not feeling that well right now. I have cramps and just really need space from all of you right now." I say which is true I started my period yesterday so I have cramps.

"Oh!" Simon exclaims. "I understand and if you need anything please let me know. I have to run to the store before bed so I can get tampons if you want me to." He says and it makes me feel bad for trying to push him away.

I go to the door and open it. "Thank you but no thanks I have enough for a couple months. Is everything ok over there? Do you need something that maybe I could loan you until tomorrow?" I ask knowing driving at night scares Simon more than he tells anyone because of the accident when he was in high school.

"Rebecca needs sugar, eggs, and flour to make cupcakes for the retreat tomorrow." He says.

"I got all of that does she also need milk?"

"No we got plenty of that." Simon says then spots Martin. "Hey Martin sorry to interrupt your visit with Ruthie just was worried I upset her earlier tonight."

"It is fine I know you two have always been close." Martin says as I grab a cloth grocery bag and fill it with the three ingredients he will need. I call Rebecca from my cell phone to check to see what else she might want. Once I have the five ingredients in the bag I hand it to Simon.

"Thank you Ruthie! I think you are the only person who understands how much I hate to drive at night." Simon says and then kisses my cheek and hugs me goodnight.

"Simon, I love you and I do understand. I think everyone in the family would understand when you are ready to be honest with them. It might actually help you to voice that fear out loud." I tell him and he just smiles at me before leaving.

As he is leaving I hear him say. "I know it would but I am still not ready."

"When you are I will be there for you." I call back at him and he laughs then waves goodnight. "Sorry about that." I say to Martin but before I can turn around I feel him behind me pressing up against me.

"No need to apologize. I love you and I love your family. Now where were we?" He asks as he holds me from behind.

"I believe we were talking about how we feel about one another." I say as we walk back to the couch with Martin behind me holding me. "Sometimes I wish I could go back in time and stop you from going up to see Simon that summer."

"I wish that too all the time." Martin admits.

"However I think then you would have stayed with Meredith had you not went up there." I say softly.

"Yeah but her and I weren't meant to be. If we were meant to be why did we break up? Why did I spiral out of control for so long before I found my way back to the real me?"

"I don't know why any of it happened but I do know that God has a plan for each of us and all that happened was meant to happen." I say softly as we sit back down facing one another. I brush a hand over his cheek softly.

"I guess so. I better get to bed now as we both have busy days tomorrow and we will have plenty of time to catch up in the near future." He says as he runs his fingers through my hair tucking it behind my ear. "Remember our kisses?" He asks suddenly.

"Yes but I don't think it would be a good idea to pick up in that spot again. I think we need to take this very slow this time."

"I agree." He says softly but leans down and kisses my cheek tenderly. "But that doesn't mean I will avoid dreaming of your kisses tonight." He whispers before getting up and leaving.

I get ready for bed after Martin leaves and I replay our relationship through the years as I shower, dress and get into bed. I fall asleep and dream of Martin.