The first thing I really remember, not just as a fact but as a blow-by-blow event, is the day Axel saved my life. It's a weird starting point, since it should, chronologically, be one of my last memories of that place. But, it's one of the few memories I have, now.
I would have been somewhere between twelve and fourteen. I'm not sure, really, how old I was at that time, just that Organization would have had about ten members by then. They were still trying to train me in the art of battle, but they didn't worry too much about my intellectual development anymore. The Order had been a group of scientists; the Organization was one of warriors. One member had the undesirable job of training me each and every day. They tended to trade off on who taught me, but Saix made the final decision, as he did with almost everything any more. That day it was Xigbar's turn.
Being one of the original group, he'd been forced to teach me since I was very small. Impatient, his hatred of me was strong, born of a long period of repression. He had written me off as a lost cause long ago, and didn't teach me so much as vent his frustration at me during these sessions. I hated training days with Xigbar as much as he did.
I don't remember the actual session. Probably, my subconscious has repressed the memory, since I'm sure it's an awful one. My actual memory starts with me limping back to my room afterwards. I'm not a Nobody. I can't create portals or teleport. I was usually the only one in any given hallway, if only because I was the only one that had to walk. I usually was careful to listen for that subtle wooshing sound an opening portal makes. I say usually, because I have no memory of hearing that sound. All I know is that one moment I was walking in an empty hallway, and the next Xigbar had pinned me against a wall with one of his gun weapons pressed against my forehead.
"What a waste," he spat.
"He'll eliminate you if you hurt me," I said, voice shaking. I wasn't sure how true that was, but it was the only defense I had. I didn't have a weapon of my own at the time.
"As if," Xigbar shot back. "The Superior shouldn't be bothered with caring for brats like you."
"You can't scare me, Xigbar."
"Oh really?" He drove the projectile in deeper, breaking the skin.
"Please, don't hurt me," I begged.
"Give me one good reason why I should let you go!" he bellowed, pulling back for dramatic effect before he shot me. Except, he didn't shoot me.
"XIGBAR!" someone yelled. I had closed my eyes, wincing, before the death blow, so I didn't see who it was until I opened them.
"Axel!" I yelped. He had Xigbar pinned to the other wall, the pointed blade of a chakram pressed against the slimy old man's throat.
"Do you want to be eliminated?" Axel hissed, ignoring my outburst.
"As if," Xigbar remarked, looking completely relaxed.
"Then don't be stupid," Axel said, dropping the chakram and pulling the other one out of the wall and Xigbar's sleeve. Xigbar teleported out of there, a sour look on his face. Axel turned to me, a weird look on his face.
"You ok, kid?" he asked. I nodded once.
"Yeah, I-I'm fine. Thanks, Axel."
He bent down and wiped the trickle of blood off my forehead. "Take care of yourself, ok?" I nodded again, and then went to my room. I felt his eyes on my back until I turned at the end of the hallway.
That's where the memory ends. I still don't know how Axel ended up there, or why he saved me. I don't remember us being good friends until Roxas arrived, which would have been awhile after this happened. I do remember that he was there every time Xigbar trained me after that. One way or another, he must have felt he had a vested interest in keeping me alive. Or maybe he just wasn't as broken as the rest of them.
