Only Fools
By lauren diane
Rated: R
Disclaimer: I don't own the characters. They belong to GH.
Summary: Elizabeth Webber, a feminist journalist, has taken the world by storm with her new book, Only Fools: Why Women Should Say No To Love, which advises woman to forget about love and focus on their career, independence, and, of course, sex. Richard "Ric" Lansing, a suave ladies' man and talented journalist, is determined to write a front page hit for the NY Daily Newspaper. When Ric's boss, Sonny Corinthos, offers him his dream, only if he can knock Miss Webber off her pedestal and write the perfect column about it, Ric sets out on a crazy journey that can only lead to love.
Author's Note: This story is my adaptation of Down With Love and How To Lose A Guy In Ten Days. I try to bring the story back to GH as much as possible, but there are obvious differences which you'll see when you read!
~*~*~
Prologue
Elizabeth Webber slowly lowered herself to sit on the large, royal blue couch that took up three fourths of the On The Rise stage area. She used her hands to slick down her short purple skirt. Great, she thought. I clash with the furniture. She didn't know why she was doing this interview in the first place. Her book, Only Fools: Why Women Should Say No To Love, was a major success all on it's own.
"Miss Webber?" Elizabeth craned her head around to see a tall, skinny man with glasses and headphones approach her.
"Yes?" She asked in her innocent voice. She gave him a sweet grin.
"I.um.I was supposed.do you want.we start rolling in.five minutes.do you need.is there something I can get you.?" Headphone Guy stuttered.
Elizabeth hid her laughter. She loved the effect her appearance had on men. Just one shy smile and this boy was putty in her hands. It was a very powerful tool she had discovered at a young age. "I'm good. Thanks." She shot him another smile before focusing on her appearance again.
There was nothing she could do about her clashing problem now. They really should have told her what color their couch was going to be. Sure, she could have watched the show before her interview, but why should she have to? Would it have killed them to just give her a little ring and warn her to avoid purple?
She did happen to look fabulous, in spite of the couch. Her purple skirt, pink tank top, and purple jacket clung nicely to her small, but appealing, figure. Her perfectly shaped ankles were accentuated with tall clogs that matched her skirt and jacket. And her hair was pinned nicely to the top of her head, only a few delicate tendrils were allowed to fall around her face.
Yes, she really was a picture, if she did say so herself. Of course she didn't have to rely on her opinion alone. Headphone Guy obviously thought she had something going on. Otherwise he might have been able to manage a complete thought.
"Elizabeth Webber." She heard a cheery voice behind her. She turned to see, whom she could only imagine was, the host, Scott Baldwin. "You are an absolute picture." See, she told herself. You were right.
"Oh, you are too kind." She let a big, fake smile spread across her lips. "I thought you were handsome of TV, but seeing you in person, you far surpass yourself." She lied. First, she'd never bothered to watch this ridiculous show that showcased up and coming stars. Second, he looked absolutely dreadful. The hair he had was, not very successfully, trying to cover his large bald spot. His dark blue suit that was also going to clash with the furniture was wrinkled. And the bags under his eyes made him look like sleep was something he cut out of his schedule. Basically, he looked like a mess.
"You are quite the charmer, Miss Webber."
"Elizabeth. Call me Elizabeth, Scott." She let her hand slide down his arm squeezing his biceps as she passed over them. His arm flexed as she did. Why was it that men always had to flex their arm when a woman touched it? Did they think we were going to be impressed if his muscles were massive? Because Elizabeth had to say, that wasn't the part of him she wanted massive.
"Okay everyone," she heard a man start. "Take your places." Everyone, including Elizabeth and Scott, did as they were told. "We start in five, four, three," the floor manager used his fingers to finish the countdown to one and action. Music, apparently the show's theme song, began to play in the background as the 'on air' light turned red.
Scott waited for the last chord to sound, before starting. "Hello everyone, and welcome to On The Rise. I'm your host, Scott Baldwin, and today I have with me," he motioned to Elizabeth. "Elizabeth Webber." The live audience started to cheer as she waved to them, sending them a thin, shy smile. "Now, as most of you probably know, Elizabeth is the author of Only Fools: Why Women Should Say No To Love." The crowd erupted in another round of applause. She gave them a quiet thank you while continuing to smile. "So, Elizabeth, explain to everyone what your book is about."
"Well," Elizabeth turned serious. This was a subject close to her heart and felt it deserved her absolute honesty. She didn't want to flirt her way through this like she did so many other things. "It's my way of empowering the women of today. So many girls have grown up with the false assumption that they need love to be successful and happy. My book helps them to understand that they don't have to be confined to the white picket fence mentality. They can have the career, the freedom, and the success that men have. Love is merely an unnecessary obstacle."
"So you don't believe in love?"
"Oh, quite the opposite, Scott. I very much believe in love. I just simple don't choose to let it into my life." Elizabeth stated honestly. She tucked a piece of hair that fell into her face behind her ear.
"But what if one day you meet that man that makes your heart go pitter patter?"
"Oh, that only happens if you leave yourself open to it." Elizabeth smirked. "There is no man out there that will ever make me fall in love."
~*~
Ric Lansing slowly poked his head out from the elevator. He took a quick scan of the lobby. No boss here, he thought to himself. Good. Now he can sneak into his office and pretend like he'd been there all morning.
"You're late again, Ric." He looked up to see Faith Roscoe standing behind him with a pissed off glare. For being a secretary, she looked very professional. She had on a black skirt and jacket that showed her flat figure, minimal make-up, and her short blonde hair was curled perfectly under. He might actually be attracted to her if she wasn't so damn scary. "Another bimbo?" She asked bitterly.
"Jealous?" His lips slightly curved up, giving Faith the smile she worked for.
She let out a sigh. "Hardly." Ric smiled again. This woman had it bad. He'd better watch out how he messed with her, though. She had a Fatal Attraction thing going on. "I covered for you with Mr. Corinthos. I said your car wouldn't start."
Sonny Corinthos, he thought to himself, was such a jackass. Ric had been working at this paper, NY Daily, for three years, and still his stories have yet to reach the cover. Everyone knew he was the best, but Sonny had some problem with him. What did it take to earn the respect of the great Sonny Corinthos?
"Thanks doll." Ric winked quick at Faith before starting to his office.
"Aren't you forgetting something?"
Ric turned around. "What? You want a kiss?"
Faith let out a staggered laugh. "Hmm.funny. No. There's a meeting this morning about the Webber book."
"Oh Shit!" Ric screamed while looking at his watch. 9:14am. Okay, he's only fourteen minutes late. That wasn't too bad. Plus his car wouldn't start--- thank you, Faith. There was no way Sonny wouldn't understand.
Ric took off running to the conference room. When he reached the door, he straightened his jacket, combed back his hair, and took a deep breath. Once he was composed, he quietly opened the door.
"When we allow ourselves to love, we only create another boundary. If we want the same freedoms and careers as men, we need to cut out all of the unnecessary obstacles." Sonny Corinthos read from a book at the head of the table. Ric slowly closed the door behind him and tip toed his way to the empty seat by the window.
"Mr. Lansing," Sonny started, before lifting his head. Uh oh, Ric thought. Busted. "Nice of you to join us." He gave him a smile that meant he was pissed.
This is just great. He wanted to earn this man's respect, yet he shows up late everyday. You are really helping yourself right out of a job, Ric, he screamed at himself.
"Yeah, um, my car."
Sonny cut him off. "Don't worry. Faith told me. Now, did you happen to read the book we're talking about?"
"Book? Right. Um.I didn't have time to. I was working on the boat assignment you gave me." Boats! He had all of this potential and Sonny wanted him to write about boats. His life had become a joke. In school, he'd dreamed of what it would be like to be a journalist. He'd travel the city looking high and low for a powerful subject. Then he'd sit at his computer and type away about something he was passionate about. His life was not so glamorous. Instead of writing about interesting news, he was writing about a boat!
"Right. How's that comin' Ric?" Sonny smirked at him. He knew exactly what he was doing to Ric's spirit. But why was it so important for him to keep Ric down?
"It's finished. Got it right here if you want it." He started to open his briefcase.
"No. Just give it to Faith." Sonny went back to addressing the entire room. "Now, this book is going to ruin the world. This Elizabeth Webber and her new age ideas are changing the way woman think. And I, for one, am not pleased." He paused, rubbing his forehead with the inside of his left index finger. "My wife has become a nightmare. Spouting to me about how I pushed her down, and that Elizabeth Webber had the right idea to exclude love from her life."
Ric had to suppress a laugh. He could just imagine Mrs. Corinthos, Carly, yelling at her husband in an irate fashion. Of course that could be because he's really only seen her acting irate. She was in the office every other day yelling at her husband about something. You'd think he'd be used to it by now.
"So what I need," Sonny went on. "Is someone to knock this woman off of her pedestal." Sonny smiled, mischievously. "What I need is someone to make this woman fall in love."
"I can do it." Ric said without hesitation. This was it. This was his in. He needed Sonny's respect and this was his way of getting it. If he could de-crown the feminist role model, and Sonny's wife would stop harassing him, maybe Sonny would have faith in him to write a cover story.
"What was that?" Sonny looked at Ric.
"I said I can do it." Ric leaned forward in his chair so the man at his left didn't block his view of Sonny. "I don't want to be thought of as full of myself, but I have a way with woman." Ric shot his boss a smile.
"Really? And you think you can make this shrew fall in love?" Sonny shook his head. "You might be good with air head playmates, Ric, but this woman is anything, but dumb. I have a feeling she'll see right through your game."
"Well, with all due respect, Mr. Corinthos, I think you're wrong. And what's the harm in giving me a chance to prove myself to you?" Ric held his breath, while Sonny stared him down.
"Okay, Mr. Lansing. I'll give you a chance." Ric felt a smile spread across his face as he exhaled. "Your assignment is to win over the lovely." he had a thick layer of sarcasm attached to the word 'lovely.' "Miss Webber, write a story about her downfall, and it will appear on the cover of the Saturday issue in two weeks."
"Two weeks from last Saturday?" Ric shrieked. "But today is Monday. That's really only." Ric used his hands to count before shooting his head back up to look at Sonny. ".twelve days!"
"If you don't think you can do it."
Ric cut him off. "No. I can do it. I can make Elizabeth Webber fall in love with me in twelve days."
TBC
By lauren diane
Rated: R
Disclaimer: I don't own the characters. They belong to GH.
Summary: Elizabeth Webber, a feminist journalist, has taken the world by storm with her new book, Only Fools: Why Women Should Say No To Love, which advises woman to forget about love and focus on their career, independence, and, of course, sex. Richard "Ric" Lansing, a suave ladies' man and talented journalist, is determined to write a front page hit for the NY Daily Newspaper. When Ric's boss, Sonny Corinthos, offers him his dream, only if he can knock Miss Webber off her pedestal and write the perfect column about it, Ric sets out on a crazy journey that can only lead to love.
Author's Note: This story is my adaptation of Down With Love and How To Lose A Guy In Ten Days. I try to bring the story back to GH as much as possible, but there are obvious differences which you'll see when you read!
~*~*~
Prologue
Elizabeth Webber slowly lowered herself to sit on the large, royal blue couch that took up three fourths of the On The Rise stage area. She used her hands to slick down her short purple skirt. Great, she thought. I clash with the furniture. She didn't know why she was doing this interview in the first place. Her book, Only Fools: Why Women Should Say No To Love, was a major success all on it's own.
"Miss Webber?" Elizabeth craned her head around to see a tall, skinny man with glasses and headphones approach her.
"Yes?" She asked in her innocent voice. She gave him a sweet grin.
"I.um.I was supposed.do you want.we start rolling in.five minutes.do you need.is there something I can get you.?" Headphone Guy stuttered.
Elizabeth hid her laughter. She loved the effect her appearance had on men. Just one shy smile and this boy was putty in her hands. It was a very powerful tool she had discovered at a young age. "I'm good. Thanks." She shot him another smile before focusing on her appearance again.
There was nothing she could do about her clashing problem now. They really should have told her what color their couch was going to be. Sure, she could have watched the show before her interview, but why should she have to? Would it have killed them to just give her a little ring and warn her to avoid purple?
She did happen to look fabulous, in spite of the couch. Her purple skirt, pink tank top, and purple jacket clung nicely to her small, but appealing, figure. Her perfectly shaped ankles were accentuated with tall clogs that matched her skirt and jacket. And her hair was pinned nicely to the top of her head, only a few delicate tendrils were allowed to fall around her face.
Yes, she really was a picture, if she did say so herself. Of course she didn't have to rely on her opinion alone. Headphone Guy obviously thought she had something going on. Otherwise he might have been able to manage a complete thought.
"Elizabeth Webber." She heard a cheery voice behind her. She turned to see, whom she could only imagine was, the host, Scott Baldwin. "You are an absolute picture." See, she told herself. You were right.
"Oh, you are too kind." She let a big, fake smile spread across her lips. "I thought you were handsome of TV, but seeing you in person, you far surpass yourself." She lied. First, she'd never bothered to watch this ridiculous show that showcased up and coming stars. Second, he looked absolutely dreadful. The hair he had was, not very successfully, trying to cover his large bald spot. His dark blue suit that was also going to clash with the furniture was wrinkled. And the bags under his eyes made him look like sleep was something he cut out of his schedule. Basically, he looked like a mess.
"You are quite the charmer, Miss Webber."
"Elizabeth. Call me Elizabeth, Scott." She let her hand slide down his arm squeezing his biceps as she passed over them. His arm flexed as she did. Why was it that men always had to flex their arm when a woman touched it? Did they think we were going to be impressed if his muscles were massive? Because Elizabeth had to say, that wasn't the part of him she wanted massive.
"Okay everyone," she heard a man start. "Take your places." Everyone, including Elizabeth and Scott, did as they were told. "We start in five, four, three," the floor manager used his fingers to finish the countdown to one and action. Music, apparently the show's theme song, began to play in the background as the 'on air' light turned red.
Scott waited for the last chord to sound, before starting. "Hello everyone, and welcome to On The Rise. I'm your host, Scott Baldwin, and today I have with me," he motioned to Elizabeth. "Elizabeth Webber." The live audience started to cheer as she waved to them, sending them a thin, shy smile. "Now, as most of you probably know, Elizabeth is the author of Only Fools: Why Women Should Say No To Love." The crowd erupted in another round of applause. She gave them a quiet thank you while continuing to smile. "So, Elizabeth, explain to everyone what your book is about."
"Well," Elizabeth turned serious. This was a subject close to her heart and felt it deserved her absolute honesty. She didn't want to flirt her way through this like she did so many other things. "It's my way of empowering the women of today. So many girls have grown up with the false assumption that they need love to be successful and happy. My book helps them to understand that they don't have to be confined to the white picket fence mentality. They can have the career, the freedom, and the success that men have. Love is merely an unnecessary obstacle."
"So you don't believe in love?"
"Oh, quite the opposite, Scott. I very much believe in love. I just simple don't choose to let it into my life." Elizabeth stated honestly. She tucked a piece of hair that fell into her face behind her ear.
"But what if one day you meet that man that makes your heart go pitter patter?"
"Oh, that only happens if you leave yourself open to it." Elizabeth smirked. "There is no man out there that will ever make me fall in love."
~*~
Ric Lansing slowly poked his head out from the elevator. He took a quick scan of the lobby. No boss here, he thought to himself. Good. Now he can sneak into his office and pretend like he'd been there all morning.
"You're late again, Ric." He looked up to see Faith Roscoe standing behind him with a pissed off glare. For being a secretary, she looked very professional. She had on a black skirt and jacket that showed her flat figure, minimal make-up, and her short blonde hair was curled perfectly under. He might actually be attracted to her if she wasn't so damn scary. "Another bimbo?" She asked bitterly.
"Jealous?" His lips slightly curved up, giving Faith the smile she worked for.
She let out a sigh. "Hardly." Ric smiled again. This woman had it bad. He'd better watch out how he messed with her, though. She had a Fatal Attraction thing going on. "I covered for you with Mr. Corinthos. I said your car wouldn't start."
Sonny Corinthos, he thought to himself, was such a jackass. Ric had been working at this paper, NY Daily, for three years, and still his stories have yet to reach the cover. Everyone knew he was the best, but Sonny had some problem with him. What did it take to earn the respect of the great Sonny Corinthos?
"Thanks doll." Ric winked quick at Faith before starting to his office.
"Aren't you forgetting something?"
Ric turned around. "What? You want a kiss?"
Faith let out a staggered laugh. "Hmm.funny. No. There's a meeting this morning about the Webber book."
"Oh Shit!" Ric screamed while looking at his watch. 9:14am. Okay, he's only fourteen minutes late. That wasn't too bad. Plus his car wouldn't start--- thank you, Faith. There was no way Sonny wouldn't understand.
Ric took off running to the conference room. When he reached the door, he straightened his jacket, combed back his hair, and took a deep breath. Once he was composed, he quietly opened the door.
"When we allow ourselves to love, we only create another boundary. If we want the same freedoms and careers as men, we need to cut out all of the unnecessary obstacles." Sonny Corinthos read from a book at the head of the table. Ric slowly closed the door behind him and tip toed his way to the empty seat by the window.
"Mr. Lansing," Sonny started, before lifting his head. Uh oh, Ric thought. Busted. "Nice of you to join us." He gave him a smile that meant he was pissed.
This is just great. He wanted to earn this man's respect, yet he shows up late everyday. You are really helping yourself right out of a job, Ric, he screamed at himself.
"Yeah, um, my car."
Sonny cut him off. "Don't worry. Faith told me. Now, did you happen to read the book we're talking about?"
"Book? Right. Um.I didn't have time to. I was working on the boat assignment you gave me." Boats! He had all of this potential and Sonny wanted him to write about boats. His life had become a joke. In school, he'd dreamed of what it would be like to be a journalist. He'd travel the city looking high and low for a powerful subject. Then he'd sit at his computer and type away about something he was passionate about. His life was not so glamorous. Instead of writing about interesting news, he was writing about a boat!
"Right. How's that comin' Ric?" Sonny smirked at him. He knew exactly what he was doing to Ric's spirit. But why was it so important for him to keep Ric down?
"It's finished. Got it right here if you want it." He started to open his briefcase.
"No. Just give it to Faith." Sonny went back to addressing the entire room. "Now, this book is going to ruin the world. This Elizabeth Webber and her new age ideas are changing the way woman think. And I, for one, am not pleased." He paused, rubbing his forehead with the inside of his left index finger. "My wife has become a nightmare. Spouting to me about how I pushed her down, and that Elizabeth Webber had the right idea to exclude love from her life."
Ric had to suppress a laugh. He could just imagine Mrs. Corinthos, Carly, yelling at her husband in an irate fashion. Of course that could be because he's really only seen her acting irate. She was in the office every other day yelling at her husband about something. You'd think he'd be used to it by now.
"So what I need," Sonny went on. "Is someone to knock this woman off of her pedestal." Sonny smiled, mischievously. "What I need is someone to make this woman fall in love."
"I can do it." Ric said without hesitation. This was it. This was his in. He needed Sonny's respect and this was his way of getting it. If he could de-crown the feminist role model, and Sonny's wife would stop harassing him, maybe Sonny would have faith in him to write a cover story.
"What was that?" Sonny looked at Ric.
"I said I can do it." Ric leaned forward in his chair so the man at his left didn't block his view of Sonny. "I don't want to be thought of as full of myself, but I have a way with woman." Ric shot his boss a smile.
"Really? And you think you can make this shrew fall in love?" Sonny shook his head. "You might be good with air head playmates, Ric, but this woman is anything, but dumb. I have a feeling she'll see right through your game."
"Well, with all due respect, Mr. Corinthos, I think you're wrong. And what's the harm in giving me a chance to prove myself to you?" Ric held his breath, while Sonny stared him down.
"Okay, Mr. Lansing. I'll give you a chance." Ric felt a smile spread across his face as he exhaled. "Your assignment is to win over the lovely." he had a thick layer of sarcasm attached to the word 'lovely.' "Miss Webber, write a story about her downfall, and it will appear on the cover of the Saturday issue in two weeks."
"Two weeks from last Saturday?" Ric shrieked. "But today is Monday. That's really only." Ric used his hands to count before shooting his head back up to look at Sonny. ".twelve days!"
"If you don't think you can do it."
Ric cut him off. "No. I can do it. I can make Elizabeth Webber fall in love with me in twelve days."
TBC
