(A/N) Can't say much without wrecking it. A humor fic featuring the sand sibs and Naruto. Cannon, I swear. x3
No warnings.
"It's always 'Naruto-this,' and 'Uzumaki-kun-that…' don't you think that's odd?"
"I don't know…"
"Come on! You didn't hear him the other day! It was 'Naruto-this,' 'Naruto-kun did this,' 'Naruto taught me' 'Uzumaki-wonderful-Naruto!' Everything led back to Naruto!"
"I think you're jumping to conclusions. Of course he's focused on Naruto; Naruto's important to him."
"A bit too important, hmm? I think so!"
"And I still say you're over reacting. He admires Naruto; there's nothing wrong with that."
"But come on! Isn't this a bit much? It's like… like idol worship!"
"Idol worship…"
"It's true! No, no… it's like… ah! It's like you and Shikamaru! Your voice gets all warm when you talk about him!"
"… He talks about Uzumaki like that…?"
"Yep! Exactly like that!"
"…"
"See? Surely you see it now?"
"… Now that you mention it…"
… … … … … …
Later that night, the two siblings, who had now come to a definitive conclusion, sat across from their younger brother at the table. The youngest of them was conscious of his siblings' stares, but tried his best to ignore them as best he could, focusing instead on the ramen he was eating.
"…"
"…"
"…"
The silence was quite uncomfortable. Finally, unable to stand his siblings' unwavering stares, he made a feeble attempt at small-talk.
"So… Kankuro… why did you make ramen tonight? It's Uzumaki Naruto's favorite, I know, but…"
The two elder siblings exchanged a knowing glance. The eldest, a girl, reached her hand across the table slightly.
"Gaara… I actually think we need to have a talk about… Uzumaki Naruto."
Gaara narrowed his blue eyes thoughtfully. "Yes? What is it?"
Kankuro cleared his throat. "Well, Gaara… I know we've said it before, but… we'll always love you, no matter what."
Gaara's invisible eyebrows rose marginally. "I appreciate hearing that, but… this has something to do with Uzumaki Naruto?"
Temari shook her head slightly. "I think that Kankuro is trying to say that we'll always be there for you, no matter what types of choices you make… no matter who you are or…" she paused for a minute, gulping audibly, "who you fall in love with."
Gaara's gaze drifted upward thoughtfully. "You… infer… that I love Uzumaki Naruto-kun?"
Kankuro took a deep breath. "That's it, brother."
"Well… I suppose I do," Gaara said after a moment's consideration. "He did… show me the way. He understands pain as I do. He is a wonderful person, who would do anything for those he cares about. I suppose I do love him."
Temari let out a relived sigh. "I'm so glad you can admit it that easily, brother."
"That's perfectly fine," Kankuro said, grinning. "In fact, it's great. It's great!"
Gaara though nothing of his siblings' reactions. "I'm glad you think so. I believe I am starting to understand this… 'love' better."
Temari nodded, reaching the rest of the way to lay her hand across her brother's hand. "I… I don't want you to be hurt," she added seriously, and Gaara's eyes narrowed fractionally in confusion. "If Naruto doesn't return that feeling, I want you to understand that it's not personal. Some people just aren't… like that."
That was when Gaara noticed something slightly off about the conversation. "What do you mean?" he asked, bewildered. "Isn't everyone capable of love?"
"Well, yeah," Kankuro said, making a helpless gesture with one hand. "It's just that… you know, the normal… arrangement of things… it's not… exactly…"
Temari sighed. "What Kankuro means to say," she paraphrased for the second time, "is that most boys fall in love with girls, most girls fall in love with boys, and… well…" She stumbled, lost for words, as Kankuro had been.
Gaara couldn't make the jump. Who could expect a boy who was just starting to understand 'love' in generalities to understand such finite meanings as his siblings were discussing?
"Most boys don't fall in love with boys," Kankuro finally finished, hurriedly and awkwardly, and then rushed to follow up with, "but that's okay! It does happen, and it's perfectly okay!"
That really threw Gaara for a loop. "But I love you, Kankuro," he objected, bewildered, "and you say you love me. Don't most brothers love each other?"
In an instant, his two siblings were as confused as poor Gaara.
"What?" Temari asked, narrowing her eyes slightly. "Are you… wait, is there any difference in the way you love Kankuro and the way you love Naruto?"
Gaara blinked. "Why would there be?"
Temari glanced over at Kankuro, her eyes narrowed. "Are you sure about this?" she asked incredulously. "I think I trust Gaara over you on the subject of Gaara's feelings."
Kankuro blinked. "I couldn't have misunderstood," he said confidently, and then faltered. "Could I have…?"
"Misunderstood what?" Gaara asked innocently, the last of the exchange going right over his head.
"Uzumaki is like a brother to you?" Temari questioned, and Gaara nodded.
"A brother and a role model," the Jinchuriki answered without hesitation.
Temari shot a fiery death glare at Kankuro, and then posed one more question, just to be absolutely sure. "Do you know how to make babies, Gaara?"
Their little brother paused, and then nodded wordlessly.
"And you don't want to do that with Uzumaki?"
Gaara's mouth fell open. "Oh no!" he exclaimed, appearing horror-stricken and pulling his hand away from Temari's. "Why would you think that?"
"I didn't," Temari said dryly. "Kankuro, on the other hand…" Without another word, she picked up her bowl of ramen and dumped it unceremoniously on Kankuro's head. "I swear! That is the last time I trust your intuition!"
Complete understanding still eluded Gaara, as it would for another two years (when he was fifteen he would finally comprehend the horrifying significance of the conversation). Kankuro got a sound whack on the head from a very peeved (and somewhat relieved) Temari, and couldn't hear out of his right ear for a week.
And when the three of them, two month later, shared a bowl of ramen with Naruto himself in Konoha… well, Naruto and Gaara were quite oblivious, but the two elder siblings couldn't quite bring themselves to eat a bite.
(A/N) Well, that was fun. Hope you enjoyed it as much as I did. Reviewers get cookies. ^^
