A/N: I Just read the first volume of GodChild (late to the party I know) and I'm completely smitten with Cain. But what I really mean to say is that this was a toss off after reading the first volume, so it may be blown out of the water by later canon. If it is, please don't beat me with beaty things.
I struggled to pull breath into my lungs. The run from the main house down to the cliffs wasn't something I had been prepared for, but when I had heard from one of the other servants that Lord Alexis had taken the boy out there it no longer mattered what I might or might not be prepared for.
Lord Alexis had always searched for a son, a figure to take after him and learn from him. It was why he had hired me in the first place. I reminded him of someone. Another of his bastard children no doubt. All the rumours I had ever heard about the Hargreaves family seemed completely founded when I looked in that man's eyes. It made me feel even sorrier for the one child who was still with him. Cain, the one who wasn't good enough.
I stumbled and fell, rolling a few feet down the hill before I could stop. When I opened my eyes the stars shone more brightly than I had ever seen them shine. They reached out into the blackness around them. I sat up and clutched at my chest, tried to suck harsh air into lungs bruised by the fall. I could hear shouting through the blood that pounded in my ears. It wasn't too late then. I pushed myself off the ground and started down the hill again towards the cliffs.
Each breath in and out was a burst of fire, an agony, but it was nothing compared to what Lord Alexis put that boy through on a regular basis. And so I ran, terrified of what I would find when I got there. Of what the Lord had done to his son this time to push the boundaries of love. Of what damage to a fragile boy I'd have to clean up.
The land evened out three hundred yards from the cliff's edge and the sight of two people in the distance pushed me forward. I sprinted the last hundred yards, unaware of any other pain except that of the boy in my care.
"It's all your fault!" Lord Alexis shouted as he waved his arms and pointed at the boy. His hair flew about his face and spit flew from his mouth as he ranted. He looked wild, mad. I reached Cain and ran into him, trying to use him as a buffer. I wanted to use him to break my speed and to break up my thoughts. My bruised ribs collided with the scars and fresh wounds on his back and we winced and shuddered as one. I wrapped my arms around him and pulled him close to me. If nothing happened to him, if the Lord didn't touch him, there would be nothing for me to clean up. It would all be okay for one more night. All the soothing words I whispered to Cain while applying salves and bandages would be true, for once. But I underestimated Lord Alexis. I underestimated them both.
The Lord's eyes widened when he saw me wrapped fiercely around his son. It was one more disappointment to him, I was sure. I was one more person who didn't measure up. He took a step back toward the cliff face. I should have called out to him, offered some word, but my first priority was and always had been to Cain. Cain, the child who stood so still in my trembling arms that I wasn't even sure he was breathing. And when Lord Alexis' final step took him over the edge and I clutched at the boy even tighter, he didn't make a sound. Cain stared, wide eyed, into the darkness. I never thought to ask what he had been looking for, if anything.
It was I who moved first. I disentangled myself from Cain and took a step back. I realized then that I had been the one shaking in fear and not him. Not the young boy with the golden eyes, the eyes that had never had the opportunity to hold the spark of youth. I watched as he lowered his head and looked back at me. The calm gaze beneath his half closed lids cut through me and reminded me of my place. An exact replica of the look Lord Alexis' eyes had held whenever I tried to speak out to him on Cain's behalf. My place, however, didn't seem nearly as important as it had before. I slowly extended my arm and offered my strength to him if he needed it.
He nodded then, as if something had been decided. He swayed and walked to me unsteadily, not really seeing anything through those wide, fey eyes. He let me drape my arm around him and turn him back toward the house. When I looked down to check my footing on the way back up the hill I noticed that my shirt was criss-crossed in red, blood from Cain's fresh wounds. And when he looked up at me, the bright light from the stars collected and magnified in those golden eyes. I knew then that it didn't matter what I did for him. It would never be all right, and as long as that man had ever been a part of this world, nothing would make Cain's pain stop. But I silently vowed then and there to the stars in those eyes that I would do everything in my power to make sure that nothing else would have the ability to hurt him, not in such a way as his love for his father did, ever again.
