Disclaimer: Does anyone really think I own Lord of the Rings? It ain't mine, don't sue me. All I own is Laura, a laptop, and a lot of books.

Strange Happenings

Chapter 1:

            On an unusually large island in the seas of Arda, Sauron the Cruel, also known as Gorthaur, Annatar, and other names that were both numerous and often unprintable, the former Dark Lord of Middle-Earth and currently in a temporary position as chief advisor to Ar-Pharazon, King of Numenor, sprawled lazily in his throne, admiring the pleasantly dark and terrible temple the King had had the kindness to build for him. From the distance there was a sound of trumpets, and he smiled. He would have his vengeance against the Men of Numenor. They would have come now to the shores of Valinor, and soon there would be war in the Undying Realms. He would probably want to get out of the way shortly and watch the eventually inevitable destruction of Numenor by the Valar from a safe distance.

            Sauron laughed at the rumble of thunder from the west, absorbed in his own dreams. There would be no power left in Middle-Earth to oppose him after this, with the Edain gone, and his dominion could spread until he ruled every land. He laughed again at the thought of it. Even his old master hadn't managed to do this well. Sauron, Lord of Arda. The name was sweet upon his tongue, and even sweeter in his own Black Speech.

                                                *********************

            On the planet its inhabitants unoriginally call Earth, Laura Hamilton, also known as Silmarien, That Nerdy Girl Who Writes Fan Fiction, and very few other names, sprawled lazily in front of her computer, trying to overcome her writer's block and continue her story on the Fall of Numenor. It wasn't going well, and for some reason Elendil and his sons seemed like idiots, the way she described them. Maybe she ought to make Sauron the main character…

            After several minutes of thought, she had typed precisely one sentence. With a sigh, she closed the document and considered actually doing her calculus homework. She shook her head. Only when she had no choice whatsoever. Laura stared at the picture of the Eye of Sauron on her desktop and wondered if it was possible to actually die of boredom. At this point, she was almost willing to write a girl-dropped-into-Middle-Earth fic, just to have something to do until her creative juices started flowing again. She opened a new file and typed a first sentence:

                                    "Legolas Greenleaf, Prince of Mirkwood, looked at the

                        human girl in front of him in surprise…"

                                            ***********************

            At that moment, in the western ocean of a world in a branch of the multiverse rather close to Earth, something began to happen. The Valar had called on Iluvatar to help them, and He was changing Arda. But even gods are not all-powerful through all the universes, and their actions can have unexpected consequences. Tearing Valinor away from the world made a rent in the fabric of space-time that Eru failed to notice, or, perhaps, didn't care about. This, coinciding with the cosmic shiver of disgust caused by the creation on Earth of yet another horrible work of fan fiction, caused several interesting events to happen at once.

            First, Sauron suddenly found himself falling out of his temple and into somewhere else. Realizing that things were not going according to plan, the Maia cursed Ar-Pharazon, the Valar, and everyone else he could think of, but could only let the tunnel, which might have been called a wormhole by other, more scientifically inclined civilizations, take him where it would.

            Elsewhere in Arda, a small piece of gold jewelry disappeared from a coffer in the treasure-house of Mordor, where it had been left by Sauron upon his rather hasty departure to placate the Numenoreans, and was pulled through the wormhole after its master.

            The wormhole connected with another rip in space-time caused by the terrible event of the writing of a Mary-Sue, and its contents were soon headed towards the site of the occurrence, which happened to be Laura Hamilton's bedroom.

            The One Ring abruptly popped into the atmosphere of the planet called Earth and landed with a clunk on the desk of a bored author of fan fiction. Its master appeared in the same place a few hours later, thoroughly confused and prepared for anything. It was almost possible to pity him, really. Sauron had no idea what he was getting into…

A.N.: This was inspired by all of the Fellowship-falls-into-modern-Earth fics, obviously. I though sending the Dark Lord here was a more humorous twist. Expect him to be very confused by Laura and very interested in certain aspects of modern society… weapons of mass destruction, for example…For those of you who haven't read The Silmarillion or even the Appendices to Return of the King (shame on you!), you don't really need to know too much about the fall of Numenor. This story will take place on Earth after this, for a while at least.

Reviews are greatly appreciated; flames will be used to heat my room.

--- Silmarien