we think we're making our own way

Yeah, I thought that the finale would kill any plot bunnies, but I guess not. I've got a couple of ideas in the works. HA!

So the basic idea for this: Sam accidentally on purpose runs into Andy, who is under, of course.

Enjoy!


It's nearly three months later that to finds out where she is. He would probably lose his badge if they knew how he found out, but he really didn't give a shit, he had to know. He didn't have a clue what to do with the information, but a small weight had been lifted off his chest just by having it.

After the sharp disappointment the night she didn't show up at the Penny, he was pissed when he found out why she hadn't shown up. She didn't just reject a second chance with him, she fucking left. No letter, no phone call, text, a goddamn email. Callaghan was no help, the freaking tool. He was pretty sure the prick was enjoying this.

It took him a little while, but he eventually asked Nash about it once. Andy hadn't said anything to her either and it actually made him feel slightly better. She guessed that her friend had taken her place. Surprised, he had asked why she turned it down.

"Luke told me I couldn't even say goodbye to my kid. I refused to do that. I'm kind of glad now I didn't, as good as an opportunity it was, I would've gone crazy not seeing Leo after a week," she told him.

He had nodded at her answer, told her thanks and turned to leave.

"Sam?" She waited while he turned around. "You now why she left, yeah? Aside from this being good for her career?" He hadn't said anything.

"I mean, I don't know everything that went down with you two, but you know you hurt her. And she likes to say she's over it, but, you know, she couldn't stop talking about how so over you she was. So, I know she wasn't. She had more reasons for taking this gig then she'll probably ever admit."

"Okay."

She shrugged. "Just saying."

"Yeah. Hey, Nash, you ever need anything, let me know."

Something about that day was what pushed him to figure where she was.

Two weeks after he got what he wanted, another knot formed in his chest. Just knowing where she was, it wasn't enough. He wasn't so familiar with the area she was in, and while he had an idea of the overall goal of Project Dakota, he had no idea at all about Andy's part in it.

And that is what leads him to where he is now. He's in his truck next to a small park in the center of the square he was told she would be working in.

It had taken him a while to really form a plan for what to do with the info he had. His initial plan had nothing to do with coming up here to try and see her. But then it wouldn't leave him alone, some little voice in the back of his head, pushing and pushing for him to come here.

This is an incredibly dumb idea. But his urge to see her just wouldn't go away. And he's always been an idiot when it comes to her, he may as well own it.

So his plan is simple (stupid, but simple). He's just going to be some random guy out for a run. He won't be completely out of place, as he's sat here, he's seen a few joggers pass his vehicle. With one last minute debate with himself, he gets out of his truck, leaving his phone behind because Oliver always calls at the best times. Like when he was talking to someone about Andy's whereabouts. Great timing, that guy.

He stretches a bit before setting out at a slow pace around the park. He knows he probably won't last long, it's still pretty frigid out and he hasn't been on a run for longer then he wants to guess. It feels good to be out though, even preoccupied by thoughts of what he'll do if he sees her.

He tries to shake the thoughts from his head of all the things he should have done differently before. He's not a man that likes to live with regrets, but he should have known that he would have ended up with some when it came to Andy McNally.

After a moment, he lets himself try to count all the times where things went wrong, where he could have said something different or done something different. It's not long before he tries to stomp done on these thoughts, it's just no use. He has to take his own advice and stop keeping count.

His pace picked up at some point, and he realizes that he's been out for an hour already. He hasn't seen a sign of her anywhere, and is afraid to turn down the wrong street and get turned around. Last thing he wants is to get lost.

Telling himself this was a bad idea to begin with, he treks back around the park, still looking around for a sign of her anyway.

And then he sees a figure by his truck, someone looking in the driver's window. He's about to yell out something when he sees it's her. He almost didn't recognize her, hair was pulled up and hidden by a hat, her coat was pretty ratty as well, holes in her jeans and shoes that probably hurt her feet more then that one pair of heels she always complained about.

But there she was. She looks over at him as he approaches, and she looks so completely shocked he wants to laugh. While she's gaping at him, he takes the opportunity to say something, make sure they are 'in character'.

"Can I help you, miss?"

She keeps staring at him, like she can't figure out what's going on. Which he can't really blame her for, but after a moment she steps away from his truck and looks down at her shoes. Her voice is quiet when she speaks up. She sounds like she's put on some slight accent, but he can't tell or place it.

"Yeah - No, I'm sorry. I thought your truck looked familiar. My - A friend of mine has one similar." She nervously shifts on her feet.

"Oh yeah? Not the first time I've actually heard that."

She smiles a little, still looking down, away from him.

"You're not really supposed to park here." He frowns, looking around. He hadn't seen any signs saying otherwise. When he looks back at Andy, her head's up again, brows raised, waiting for something.

He nods. "Ah, I'm not from around here."

"You don't say."

He grins at her. "Just wanted to check it out, heard good things about this place."

She snorts. "I bet you did."

There's another pause. He had thought a lot about what he wanted to do and what he should do if he only just saw her. He never thought he'd be in a position to talk to her. He doesn't have an idea of what to say, especially in code or whatever this talk was.

"I should get back." She thumbs over her shoulder towards some shop.

"Uh, right. Sorry about the confusion." He waves at his truck.

She smiles again, wider then before. "It's alright, it's a nice truck."

He smiles back. "It's good to - it's good that you let me know I can't park here. I'll try to remember that." He puts his hands in his pockets, a little awkward with nothing else to say and unsure of what he is saying.

"Okay." She looks faintly amused. But she doesn't say anything else, obviously still thrown for a loop with his appearance.

"So, I'll just get going." She nods at him, stepping again to let him get in the vehicle.

"Have a safe trip, yeah?"

"Yeah, I'll do that." With his window down, he starts his truck up, and turns his eyes on her again.

"I -" He stops, not knowing how to continue in this code talk. He wants to tell her to keep safe too, that he foolishly misses her, that he wants to break the rules with her like they did last time. That he loves her. He wants to say it to her again, knowing he had been a coward to hold it from her for so long, letting it spill over only at the worst possible time.

He looks around a bit, not really seeing anyone around, but knows that doesn't matter. When she shivers a bit, it bolsters his decision.

"Your jacket doesn't look like it'll keep you very warm."

Her face scrunches up, probably wondering why he hasn't left already. "It's alright. I've had it awhile."

He grabs his outer coat that he shed before going for his run. He holds it out his window to her.

"Here, I don't really need it."

She's frowning at it, but gently takes it from him. "Thanks, I guess."

"I'll, uh, see you."

Her eyes snap up to meet his, some fear showing on her face. He shakes his head subtly, trying to convey to her that he knows not to come back here.

She breathes out and mumbles, "Thanks for the coat." They both know they've spent too much time at this, so she turns and heads back to the shop she gestured towards a few minutes ago.

Not wanting to sit there and watch her so obviously, he pulls away from the park, circling around it. He tries to catch sight of her again, but she's already inside, and a part of him is glad, they didn't need to attract any attention to their encounter.

His chest finally feels lighter again. He tries not to dwell on how this could have and maybe still will backfire. It didn't matter as long as he didn't blow her cover and he's sure he didn't. No one here knows him, he even got lost coming here, since he hadn't thought of looking up directions.

His phones besides him beeps, a missed call. From Oliver, of course. He laughs as he tosses his phone back to the seat next to him, he freaking knew it. He settles in for his half hour drive back home, making plans to stop at a diner for some food.

He's exhausted by the time he makes it back, even though it's early afternoon. If he were honest with himself, he hasn't been sleeping all that well for a long while. Not wanting to think about why, he throws himself on his couch, knowing he'll regret resting on it later, but not caring.

It's only an hour later that his phone wakes him up. He fumbles with it a second, still hazy from his short nap. The number is unknown, but he answers anyway.

"Hello?"

Without a greeting: "What the hell were you thinking, Sam?" Her voice sounds like a loud whisper, a loud, angry whisper, and he wonders where she's calling from.

"Look, I'm sorry, I didn't know I'd run into you."

There's a pause. "You didn't - you just happened to be there? Like it was some coincidence?"

He sighs. "No, I knew you were in the area. I - I wanted to see you, is all. I didn't plan to actually run into you and talk to you."

He hears her groan. "God, Sam, why? Do you have idea how stupid it was to show up like that? Luke could have been there, he checks up on us every so often, you know. Nick could have seen you. And he never would have shut up if he did."

He pinches the bridge of his nose, wishing he had a good excuse, wishing he wasn't such a coward and could just tell her exactly why he had to see her. He knows now why he hadn't thought about the possibility of running into her and having to talk.

"Where are you calling me from?"

"Shop's phone. I've only got a few minutes." Nothing for a moment. "I should have found a way to let you know I was going."

"I get it. I really do. We've um, we made a mess of things, yeah?" He shrugs a shoulder, even though he knows she can't see him. "Or at least, I did."

"I'm sorry." Her voice is soft. Sad, he thinks.

"Don't. Just, do your job, okay? Do what you have to do, stay safe and come home when the job's done."

"Can we talk when I get back?"

He smiles a little. "You bet."

"Thanks for the jacket, by the way. So much better then the one I was stuck with."

"No problem."

Silence again. The past couple of months catch up to them, and a few minutes on the phone, while one of them is under, isn't doing them any favours.

"Listen, I've gotta go. I won't be calling again and you cannot come up here again, you got it?" Her voice is shaky, but firm.

"Yeah, Andy, I do. It was ridiculous, but I couldn't help myself. I'm not - I won't do anything more, I don't want to put you in jeopardy."

"Oh. You - okay, I've really got to go. I - Well, I'll see you when I see you, yeah?"

"Absolutely."

She says okay one more time before hanging up. The smile stays on his face as he puts his phone back.

He has no idea how things will turn out when she gets back, but he feels better about it. He'll have her in his life anyway he can have her.

He wonders if it would be too presumptuous to get that dog he talked to her about before.


This wouldn't end. LOL It was supposed to end when Sam got home, but it wouldn't. I'm still not sure about where I did stop it, but I'm out. LOL I don't think I've ever so consistently written fics that were well over 1,000 words. Thank you (or curse you) Rookie Blue.

Thanks for reading!