Author: Divine Dark Angel (A.K.A Alexandria, A.K.A Alex)
Fandom: Ouran Koukou Host Club
Rating: R, for relationships outside the norm, adult situations and language.
Genre: Romantic Comedy
Disclaimer: I do not own Ouran, the Host Club, or anything else you recognize. In other words, my name is not Bisco Hatori, hell I'm not even Japanese. I apologize in advance for the lame French, 'cause I'm not that either (Well I am, just several, okay two, generations back.). Any characters you do not recognize are copyright to me, from an actual novel I'm in the process of writing. If you attempt to claim them for your own you will be dead before you hit the ground.
Note: This is the only time I am posting a Disclaimer. For the rest of this fictional work this disclaimer applies. I am making no profit from this work, and do not claim to own anything related to the Host Club.
Pairings: Haruhi/Kyouya/Tamaki/Mitsukuni/Takashi/Kaoru/Hikaru. There is no yaoi here, if you were looking for that you are in the wrong place. Also if you are easily offended by non-monogamous relationships, I suggest you look elsewhere for your entertainment.
Summary: Renge calls in a favor from a person who is determined to help Haruhi and the Host Club work around their feelings for each other. Can the possibility of this crazy romantic heptagon work out?
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"Bonjour? Ceci la résidence de DeLoche, comment peut-elle j'est-elle vous aider?"
"Je dois parler avec la Mlle. Antoinette immédiatement, svp."
"Est-ce que la jeune maîtresse dehors, j'est peux prendre un message?"
"Dites-lui que j'appelle dans ma dette. Je m'attends à un appel téléphonique dans un délai de trois heures."
"Qui doit je lui indiquer appelle? "
"Mlle Renge Hoshakuji."
"Je lui donnerai le message, bon après-midi."
"Au revoir."
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"Bon Après-midi, Club De Centre serveur." Antoinette DeLoche murmured, sliding through the gap in the double doors of the third music room of Ouran. She was a small girl, no more than five foot three, with shoulder length auburn hair pulled into a high ponytail, jeans that were just a tad to long for her and an oversized sweatshirt emblazoned with 'Harvard University' across the front. Her only remarkable feature, her startling green eyes, stood out in a face a little to wide to be called pretty. She wore no make-up, and very little jewlery. All in all she was the plainest girl they had ever laid eyes on, other than Haruhi.
"Bon Après-midi, Mlle." Sou Tamaki, self-proclaimed King of the Ouran High School Host Club, bowed to the young woman. His brilliant idea of a 'Room of Kings' cosplay was only half realized, since the hosts weren't scheduled to open the club for another twenty minutes. Tamaki himself was half in half out of his Pharaoh costume, but had turned at once with a smile to greet the early customer.
"Tout de vous parlent français?" Antoinette inquired, turning to address the rest of the group.
"Non, je suis le seul. Savez-vous le japonais?" Tamaki replied, shaking his head sadly.
"Yes, I speak japanese as well. I apologize for not just starting in Japanese; I slip into the mother tongue quite often. I am here on account of a debt I owe to Renge-chan. Is Fujioka Haruhi here? I see no one who matches her description in front of me…" Antoinette trailed off, scanning around the lavish room in search of the female host.
"Haruhi is currently changing in the back. What is it exactly that you have come here to discuss with her?" Ohtori Kyoya queried, pushing his glasses up with one finger. He was half dressed as the Black Prince of Wales, shirtless with a loose linen shirt resting on a couch beside him. "Are you by any chance associated with the Zuka club? If you are I'm going to have to kindly ask you to leave."
"I am quite sure I should be offended by that statement. But no, Mr. Ohtori, I am not a member of the 'White Lily Society.' I am here to help Fujioka-san with a little problem she has having." Antoinette replied, giving Kyoya a look that stated she clearly was not of the mind to take any of his 'Shadow King' shit.
"Kyoya-senpai? Tamaki-sempai? Is something the matter? The Host Club should be opening any minute now." Haruhi entered the room, adjusting the collar of her Elizabethan ruff, and glancing around with a puzzled expression on her normally placid face. The Twins slinked over to her to meddle with her outfit, straightening cuffs and tightening the strap around the knee openings of her pants. They ran hands up her calves to straighten her white knee socks, following the seams of the pants up as high as the inside of her thighs before she smacked their hands away. Haruhi looked over the head of the twin (Kaoru) currently nuzzling her neck (with the pretense of 'making sure the collar didn't rub') to try and read Tamaki's face.
"Ahh, Haru-chan! No nothings the matter at all!" Tamaki laughed one hand behind his head. He blushed a bit as his movement caused the undone shoulder straps to slip off, his loose white bottoms slipping precariously down around his hips. Frantically he pulled the costume back together, glancing between Haruhi and Antoinette to see if either of them had noticed. Antoinette was laughing from behind her hand while Haruhi looked completely oblivious.
"Tamaki-senpai, you are a very poor liar." Haruhi replied in a flat tone, as the twins quit fiddling with her clothes and came to a stop on either side of her.
"Ne, Haru-chan? Is that anyway to talk to your father? Mother, Haru-chan is being rude!" Tamaki went immediately to his wall of angst, growing mushrooms and drawing swirls on the wall.
Kyoya adjusted his glasses again and lead Haruhi over to their visitor, "Antoinette DeLoche, this is Fujioka Haruhi. Haruhi, Antoinette."
"Hello, DeLoche-san." Haruhi bowed.
"Fujioka-san, if I may have a moment I would like you to meet a few very important people. Ohtori-san, I am booking the Host Club for the afternoon, and I designate Fujioka-san as the host for which all credit should go."
"Ne DeLoche-san, that will cost-" Kyoya slipped his hand over Haruhi's mouth to murmur in her ear for a moment. When she nodded he let his hand fall and moved away. She turned with a smile to Antoinette. "Very well, DeLoche-san. Please join me over here at these couches. When will the rest of your party arrive?"
Antoinette glanced at the watch on her right arm; "I give them exactly two minutes before they figure out where I am."
"May I get you anything? Tea, water?"
"If you have ginger tea I would like two cups, please. For myself a cup of green tea if you would be so kind. Do you have anything Alcoholic?" She glanced around again, chuckling at the interactions of the various members of the Host Club. The twins had their heads together, every once and a while shooting cautious glances over to where Haruhi stood across from her designator. Kyoya was to all appearances at ease at one of the tables pushed against the back wall of the clubroom, but every couple of minutes his gaze too would go to the commoner standing unaware across the room. Mitsukuni and Takashi were entertaining themselves by playing checkers at a table near where the two girls were standing, prepared for anything that might threaten the safety of their dearest girl. Tamaki was still in his corner of woe, glancing over every so often with sad eyes.
'They're all so clueless about how to go about this. It's such a good thing Renge called me when she did.' Antoinette thought, amused at the obliviousness the group showed in how to deal with the girl they all cared deeply for. She moved over to the indicated couches and sat down with a grateful sigh. The red-eye flight she had taken from home had worn her out.
Haruhi looked to Kyoya for help, "We have everything except the alcohol, Kyoya-senpai. Should I get it?"
"No Haruhi. Go chat with your customer. Hikaru and Kaoru will go with you. Mori-senpai, you and Hani-senpai please fetch the required refreshments and meet the rest of us over there. Tamaki? Are you going to join us, or grow mushrooms?"
Tamaki pulled himself together with a whimper and sulked over to stand behind Haruhi's seat.
Exactly two minutes later the doors to the Third Music room almost exploded from their casings. Six men stalked through the newly opened doors to find the group chatting over tea. They paused to assess the situation before walking quickly towards where Antoinette was sitting, shoving Tamaki out of the way as they pulled her up and ran hands over her to check if she had come to any injury. Haruhi laughed as the scene was strangely familiar to her, before Kyoya stepping between her and these new comers cut off her view.
"Boy! This is not the impression I wanted to give to Haruhi! Damnit PUT ME DOWN!" There was a grunt and suddenly Antoinette was visible again, her mass of hair in tangled knots down her back. She sighed and resumed her seat as the redheaded man in her group crossed his arms and glared at the wall.
"Fujioka-san, I really wanted to introduce myself and my boyfriends calmly. But it seems if I do not stay in the car whilst they attempt to locate something I already knew how to find they think I am going to injure myself." She threw her hands up in the air in the universal sign of 'I give up', "You see Fujioka-san, I was called by a close friend of yours recently and became interested in your predicament. Six handsome men all in love with you-" she ignored the muffled coughs and the outright denials in the background, "-and you not knowing which to pick because you love them all and can not decide on just one. I have been in the same situation, relatively speaking."
She turned to the men beside and behind her, smiling at them. She lifted a hand towards the dark-skinned man standing to her left, grinning widely when he took it in his and kissed it. He was around six foot five and African by way of Ireland, his dark brown eyes were sizing up the other people in the room even as he took a seat next to Antoinette. One of the other men, the shortest at only five foot five with grey eyes and light brown hair, plopped down on her other side. He too took charge of a hand, bringing it to his mouth as if to kiss it but turning it to expose her wrist instead. He flicked the skin there with his tounge quickly, his eyes laughing up at Antoinette as she gasped in indignation. The remaining men, among them a pair of identical twins, ranged themselves around the other two.
"May I introduce my boyfriends? This is Damien Orion, of the Orion medical Research Company," She lifted the hand attached to the dark skinned man with shoulder length black hair and the body of a high school QB. "These are Pierce and Gideon Adams, of Adams marketing," She nodded to the twins standing behind her couch, blonde hair slicked back in a low ponytail, "This is Tristan Connor, who owns so many companies that it's pointless to keep up with them all," the redhead grunted at her, still glaring at the wall, "That is Kipp Wolf, of Wolf industries," she looked at the only man not in jeans, "And lastly we come to Micah Alexander, whose family is old money, so he really doesn't do much." With practiced ease she ducked and missed the swipe the slender brunette sitting next to her aimed at her head.
Haruhi said nothing, just starred across at Toni and her men. She could see so many similarities in the two groups she almost attributed it to a bad dream caused by to much ootoro. She could feel the heavy weight that was Mori-senpai's hand on her shoulder, could see the intrigue on Kyouya-senpai's face, felt the tension of her twins as they sat on the floor pressed to her legs. Tamaki had long since fainted and lay sprawled on the floor by her chair.
The whole thing seemed like some sort of bad joke waiting to happen and went against her upbringing. Still she was intrigued by certain differences she noted in the way the two groups handled the situation. The older group never crowded each other, never clamored for the same body space that another man currently held. Wistfully she thought of coming home to her men and not being smothered to death by one or the other of them. Maybe Antoinette had a secret button she pressed and the men got a shock? Did she see something like that on the television once to stop dogs from barking? Maybe it worked just as well on overbearing men…But that didn't explain why Antoinette was so ready to show her love for this many men in public. Haruhi decided she was throughly poleaxed.
"DeLoche-san…I don't understand. How could you be so blatant about your obviously untraditional relationship? Don't people talk badly about you? And what about the negative impact on the business of your…err…lovers? Didn't you think of them when you made this decision?" Haruhi asked, leaning forward on her elbows to cast a dubious look over Antoinette.
She could see the other woman tense, her face tightening, eyes narrowing. She opened her mouth to reply when Tristan came over to rest a hand on her shoulder, the twin on the left moving without being asked to sit in a vacant chair next to the couch. He whispered in Antionette's ear for a moment, then he turned his remarkable his hazel eyes on Haruhi, "Fujioka-san, we have heard many things about our choice in lover. My business has suffered but we all love Antoinette with all of our hearts. We all came to this arrangement together. None of us liked it in the beginning, but there have been benefits. For example, I never worry about not being home on time, because I know that Damien gets off work two hours before Toni does and will be at the house to greet her and Gideon when they walk in the door. Just like he and Gideon know that Kipp and Micah will be up earlier than the rest of us and will leave breakfast for us all on the table in the main dinning hall. Pierce takes Toni to work everyday, and we rotate as to who brings her lunch. On days when one of us has a day off we take her out for dinner, or a movie, or whatever she wants to do. We work well as a family."
Haruhi could almost imagine herself in that situation, with Kyouya-senpai coming home late to the dinner she and Hani-senpai had made for the rest of them…but ah, Damien was talking now and she had nearly missed the beginning of his speech.
"We've had several servants who had been with our family's for generations leave because they refused to live in a house with 'foolish fornicators', and in a nest of 'sin and treachery'." Antoinette flinched at those words, but Damien continued in his soft voice, "But we found that we really didn't need servants in the first place. Antoinette was raised in wealth, but she spent most of her time out with the families of her father's guard. She knows the basics of being a 'Domestic Goddess'. Her father hasn't spoken to her since she announced that she was moving into Micah's mansion to be with all of us. Her mother hasn't spoken to her since she was in middle school, favoring her younger brother instead. So yes, Fujioka-san, we've given up a lot of worthless shit we really don't care about. Once the media had it's day with our relationship it was over and business is better now than it was before the scandal broke out."
"What about children?" Hani asked as he pushed a tray over to where the group was. Antoinette took it from him with a smile and poured tea for Damien and Tristan. Micah and the twins looked longingly for the alcohol they needed but were disappointed to see bottled water instead. Antoinette chuckled and kissed each of them softly when she handed them their waters. Sighing she turned back to the startled Host Club with a soft expression on her face.
"The issue of children has never been a problem for us, since there is a hormonal problem with me carrying a child to term. The doctors are still attempting to discover what the hormone is, but it is a long shot at best. We have considered adoption, but the social workers take one look at me and brand me a slut and unfit to raise a child." There was a pained look in her eyes as she said that, and Haruhi could see the love she had for children was great indeed. "I work as a pediatrician in one of the hospitals owned by Damien's company, so I see so many sick kids I would probably be neurotic with one of my own." She gave a forced laugh, and swiped at her eyes. Micah stroked her hand and rolled his face on her shoulder. She smiled wanly a him, "Haruhi, I am sure I have given you and your men a lot of things to think about, and I am sure you would like to discuss it out of our hearing. I am a bit worn out as it is, and I think we will retire to the hotel for now. Here is the address and my cell phone number if you need anything. We will drop by tomorrow afternoon as well Ohtori-san, so please do add that to my bill. "
Antoinette rose from her couch and started walking towards the door, hands enveloped on each side by Damien and Micah. The twins walked ahead to open the doors for them, as Kipp and Tristan brought up the rear. The older twins nodded to the Host Club as they swung the doors shut gently behind them.
"Well…. That was interesting." Kaoru remarked to his brother, rolling his head against Haruhi's thigh.
"Quite." Hikaru replied, glancing through his lashes up at Haruhi.
