Ships: Harry/Draco (H/D)
Setting: Wartime
Genre: angst, gore, torture
A/N: This fanfiction completely ignores the seventh book, Deathly Hallows. So pleeease don't flame about the fact that 'that's not what happened.' I don't care. I'm an author. I do these things. In any case, this was a plot bunny that wouldn't leave me alone. So here you go!
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A Deathly Obsession
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Harry's POV
Day 69
There are spells flying everywhere. Screaming people, blood, the sickening stench of death….we're surrounded. I don't want to die. I don't want to fight. Why couldn't the spell have worked back when I was one? I would rather be anywhere but here drenched in blood, and coated in dried, stale feces and mud. Lifeless eyes are staring up at me. Out of the darkness. So cold….they're so cold…
And then there are the crawlers. Desperate for some kind of sanctuary, some kind of hope. They die. Just like all the rest. I kill them. I put them out of their misery. Yes, there is blood on my hands. How many people? I don't know. Hundreds. Maybe thousands. I don't want to think about it. All the throats I've slit. All the stomachs I've torn open. All the intestines I've cut. I'm a monster. But I have to be. I have to be this ruthless killing beast to get through all of this horror.
Day 92
This pointless war. It just goes on and on. Every day. On into eternity. For all time. All of us, all of the soldiers, we're going to be fighting until the world turns to dust. Until the entire universe dies. Until every light goes out. We'll be here. Dieing, bleeding, screaming, crying, thrashing, torturing, killing, destroying. Every last one of us. We'll be here. And all the life will be squeezed out of us. Until our faces are purple and our cheeks and eyes bulge out grotesquely, we'll choke.
Day 105
There have been more casualties. Many more. Today Molly and Arthur died. They were found by the Death Eaters and tortured for information. And they didn't give in. They never gave in. So loyal as to give their lives for the lives of others that would have died anyway. Why do I have to be the reason for all of this death? This is all my fault. All of it. WHY?! I don't want this to be happening! I just….augh! –sound of something hard being kicked- I just want to get away from all of this. All of this pain. Just me….and Malfoy. He would know what to do. The bloody con always knows what to do. Always.
Day 137
Malfoy…he moves with some kind of an ethereal grace. Every joint moving with a beautiful fluidity…it's amazing. And even with this grace, he's fast. The fastest. In the blink of an eye you'd be dead. Just the blink of an eye. Don't blink. Don't blink. You'll see green. Or silver. Then red. Then blackness. Just blackness. Don't worry. It'll be alright. You'll just float. Float for eternity.
The men have been complaining lately. About lack of sex. I'd never realized that they would still be able to worry about something like this during this war. With every movement of camp, they've taken to scouting for animals nearby. They steal away the wolves, and the cows. Any animal they can. Then they torture them. Torture them with sex. Yes, they're using bestiality to sate themselves. It's disgusting. I hate it. How could someone do anything like that? But they need it. They need it to 'get by' they tell me. Just to 'get by.'
Day 164
Malfoy is so beautiful. I guess I never noticed it back at school. I must have been attracted to him though. I could never leave him alone. We could never leave each other alone. I realized that now. I realize that I love him. He's my angel. My beautiful angel. Stained with blood and tortured. But he's a demon. So many deaths because of him. Percy and Luna and Neville and Ginny and Oliver. Just a few. Only a few. He's divided in two. One for me, and one for Voldemort.
Day 198
I'm going crazy. There's blood everywhere. The Death Eaters are close. Very close. Just over there is where they're hiding. Only a few feet away. They want to kill me. They have to bring me to Voldemort, but they want to kill me themselves. We have to move camp. Farther north, I think. That's right. Farther north. Just go farther north and we'll get away. We'll get away from it all. Then I won't have to be crazy. I can just be me. I can be normal. As normal as I can ever be. Not famous. No, never famous. Just not crazy. Just normal.
Day 217
I need him. I need him but he's not here. He's never here. Always gone somewhere else. With the Death Eaters. My angel is a Death Eater. But he would listen. He would. He'd need to. I would make him listen, make him understand. I would force him if I had to. I wouldn't have to, though. He would listen. I know he would. He's the only one that I would trust with my life. I don't know him, but I already trust him. Trust him with my life.
Day 246
I don't know what to do anymore. Draco is….everything. It hurts….I've only just seen him. Fought against him. With him. Everything is falling apart…..we're losing. So badly….and I can't deal with this. I NEED DRACO. God, it hurts so much…
Day 277
Today I….I told him. I said 'I love you.' Over the screams and the shouting. I said 'I love you.' And I do. So much, Draco. I've never seen you with your mask off. Just walking. Or thinking. And I want to see you like that. All the time. But I can't because you're the enemy. I have to kill you. I have to kill Voldemort. I have to kill my angel and his other master.
Day 291
No. Nonono. He couldn't have. He didn't. He knew I would kill him. He wouldn't be able to do it.
"NOOOO!"
–heavy object crashes against the wall-
"Ron. And Hermione. Both of them. Draco why did you do it?!"
–more crashes-
"I LOVE YOU! WHY?! WHY DO THIS TO ME?!"
–ragged sobbing-
Day 312
I've finally got him. I've got my angel. Now he'll die.
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-muffled groaning-
"Where am I?"
"You're alright. We're in a safehouse somewhere in the Forbidden Forest."
"How did we get here? What happened? And why are you here Potter?"
"I used a Port Key. Right before we left you got hit by a Stunning spell. The conflicting energy of the Port Key and the spell knocked you unconscious. As for me….I'm here to kill you."
"Oh, well that's a big surprise."
-laughing-
"Oh, my angel. You really are funny. But don't worry. It's just us."
"Ugh. Get me out of this filthy place. And take me back. You disgust me Potter."
-loud thud against something hard-
-softly- "Do I?"
"Yes."
"Mm. We'll see about that."
-quiet, wet sound-
-shocked- "Wha-Did you just kiss me Potter?!"
"Mmhmm."
-prolonged soft, wet sound-
"...Potter…."
"Yes, angel?"
"Get the bloody fuck off of me."
-clink of sharp metal coming out of a sheath-
"I wonder how many throats I've slit with this knife. Many. I know that much."
-quietly- "Potter….what the hell are you doing?"
"I'm bleeding you, my dear angel. I'm bleeding you."
-a sharp gasp-
"Stop! Potter, stop it! I'll bleed to death!"
-angrily- "Should I? Should I really stop? You deserve it. After all, you killed Ron and Hermione. They didn't even do anything to you. Never. You treated them like dirt in school. And then you killed them when you got the chance. Did you really hate them that much? Did you?"
-scared- "No! Never! You should stop. I never intended to kill them. I swear! The Dark Lord, he made me do it. I was under the influence of the Imperius curse!"
"I could kill you right now. With the flick of the wrist…" –sound of a zipper being opened- "Or the heat of one kiss…." –soft, wet sound- "It would be so easy…"
-desperately- "Please, Potter. Don't do this!"
"Oh, my angel, I'm going to do this. I'll always do this."
-quiet shuffling-
-confused- "Huh? What are you….what are you going to do?"
-smile- "This. Crucio."
"AAAUGH! AAAAH!"
-thrashing-
"You're so beautiful angel. I only want to teach you a lesson."
-sound of skin brushing through hair-
-heavy breathing- "Get…get away from me."
"Oh, angel. No. I'll never get away. I'll never leave. I'll be with you forever."
-scared- "No…no…what are you doing?! Don't! Please! Potter I'm sorry!"
-coldly- "It's too late for sorry. You've killed my friends. And now you've got to learn your lesson."
-sound of metal slicing through skin-
"AAAAH!"
"Yes, dear angel lost a hand. But now you can't kill anyone ever again. Don't you see? This is a good thing."
"No! No you crazy bastard! AAAH!"
"Quiet, angel. Or I'll rub the salt in deeper. It'll be more painful. But maybe you need it. Maybe you deserve it, angel."
-loud, pained screams-
"Good. Dear angel, you're learning your lesson. You'll do what I say."
-crying- "P-Please! I just want to go! Please…."
"No. I'm sorry angel. You can't leave until you completely understand."
"NO MORE! AAAUGH!"
-many small sounds of metal slicing skin-
-raspy- "Please….please Potter….I don't want to die."
"Neither do I, angel, but you need to learn your lesson. You need to understand."
-very quietly- "…Potter….I….never wanted…this….I just….wanted……freedom…"
-soft thud and sighing-
"There. Now the angel is in heaven. Good bye, angel. I'll be with you soon."
-sound of a body being moved-
"I dug a grave for your body, angel. So you can join the earth again. It's big enough for both of us, angel. Just for the two of us."
-thud of a body onto dirt-
"It's okay. Don't worry. Very soon. We'll be together very soon."
-loud thud and shuffling-
"Wingardium Leviosa."
Very soon, angel. You've paid for your sins. And now I'll join you.
-soft whump and the sound of suffocation-
We're together, angel. We're finally together. I can love you forever.
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A/N: Well….that turned out to be a lot more gory and strange than I expected it to be. Um, well, tell me what you think. I'm still too shocked that I wrote something so serious to be able to evaluate it properly. In other words, review!
