The sun was brilliant, its radiant light gently beating down upon the fair lands below. Over the tremulous mountains that peaked and arched, gently nestled in their bosom, was the wondrous and quite merry town of South Park; A quiet mountain town. In the merry land of South Park, all was right. The birds sang gloriously, floating through the chilly morning air on their merry, wondrous way.

Sloshing through the whitest snow that daintily rested upon the cold cement side walk was Eric Cartman. Eric sighed taking a deep breath of fresh mountain air. He was walking to go hang out with his best buddies...ever. Eric headed towards Stan's house, trotting up the steps and softly giving the door a gentle, yet friendly, tap. He patiently waited while it took forever to answer it. After quite some time the door slowly swung open and there stood Stan in all his emo, wrist slitting, pill popping, suicidal glory. He offered Eric a weak smile. "Hey Eric. How are you?" he whined as he toyed with his wrist bands.

"Ah...Stan. Are you okay? You look a little sad. Let me console you, friend." Eric smiled brightly pulling Stan against his flat chest. During the years, Eric had given up junk food and instead he greatly enjoyed exercise and had dropped any and all body fat that may have once existed on his persons for no apparent reason. Eric smiled after Stan gave him and incredibly morbid look of self loathing.

"Eric, please release me..." His blue eyes darting away from Eric's soft brown eyes.

"If you insist, friend." He smiled and set him down.

For no apparent reason, other then to go visit Kyle. Eric and Stan went to visit Kyle.

"This was a great idea." Eric smiled cheerily, sucking down a deep breath of fresh mountain air.

"Yeah...whatever." Stan sighed rubbing his eyes with his hand, his black nail polish glinting in the sunlight, his fingers smearing some eyeliner underneath his eye.

Eric trotted up the steps to Kyle's house and gave the door a gentle tap.

The door swung open wide, and Eric craned his neck to look upon the behemoth man-jew that was Kyle Broflovski.

"Good day Kyle! How are you doing? Stan and I wanted to know if perhaps you'd like to accompany us the park perhaps?"

Kyle grunted looking down his nose at Eric. He scratched his crotch for a good minute or so before he had decided to answer. "Only if we are going to play football."

"Sure, I love football and other athletics!" Eric smiled while Kyle turned around to go get his coat.

Stan looked smitten watching Kyle lumber around in all his testosterone sporting glory. His pale cheeks were slightly flushed, his blue eyes twinkling. He knew in his heart of hearts that his best friend was his soul mate despite their differences.

Kyle trudged outside unable to button his coat over his huge manly chest, a forest of red curly hair encompassing most of his body, it pushed over the edge of his shirt and just seemed to have Eric and Stan mesmerized.

Kyle grunted once again resorting to scratching some various part of his body as they trio of best buddies scampered off to the park(Kyle was lumbering. Manly lumbering). Kyle was the first one to grunt and notice what their financially challenged friend, Kenny, was up to on a park bench. It seems he'd found some new place to stick his dick, and managed to capture a squirrel.

"Oh my god." Eric and Stan chimed in unison. Kenny looked up at this but it didn't dissuade him to stop. He did release the squirrel though and just continued jacking it, but that wasn't at all out of the ordinary for their extraordinarily horny friend.

Stan had sidled over to Kyle, curling into his manly side and stroking his manly abdomen. Kyle mere ignored him and spat on the snow periodically. Kenny greeted them, zipping up his pants but he was constantly massaging his own bulge as they stood there rather awkwardly.

Eric took a deep breath and sighed. "Well friends. I think I'm quite exhausted and have had quite enough of this. Farewell guys, I am going home." He gestured over yonder towards his house and made his way through the snow. Kyle grunted and headed towards his house, Stan clinging to his side being dragged along beside him his feet hanging weakly his arms tightly braced around his masculine mid section. "Come on Stan. You can help me shave my back." He grunted.

Kenny wandered off on the continuing quest for something warm and wet.

And so the day ended in the wonderful land of South Park, a pleasant mountain town. And so the boys would resume their merry lives. The birds chirped as they settled in for the evening, the bright, lovely sun setting over the mountain ridges that cradled this safe haven that was the ideal world for all who should be on medication. A world with questions and zero answers. A world where everyone in just a few years would wind up killing themselves. What a wonderful world. The moon slowly took the sky and with that. Everyone slumbered.