Why did she have to do it? She knew what would happen if they both got trashed. Hermione was her best friend and she risked it all. All for a stupid one night stand that she thought might be more.
It had started out as just some fun and while they were drunkenly fondeling eachother words had been whispered and moaned. Promises of leaving their stupid boyfriends and being with eachother, not caring what everybody else had thought of them and what they had, but they were just drunk remember.
Of course Ginny's personality had been more self destructive lately. Maybe it was the death of her father, the distance that she had put between herself and her brothers. Ron saw everything at school and wouldn't really do anything. He would just say things like "how much did you smoke today" or "hope your hangover's not too bad tomorrow." Everybody knew that she did things, got drunk and partied, but nobody stopped her.
Harry had been there saw everything, but he was doing it too and didn't think that they had problems. Of course he loved her and had never once cheated on her. That's what broke her heart when she finally told him about the three people that she had been with while they were together. She made up the names and didn't want to hurt them. He said that he forgave her and didn't care he just wanted to be with her. She didn't deserve him. He was too good. He needed to find somebody who would treat him right. So she let him go.
Of course the other two didn't matter, they were just friends being a little more than friends, and she didn't care about those much. But she didn't think things would get so bad. That her best friend would hate her.
They would joke around about it in front of the boys. It was a nice little secret to have between them, but it wasn't between them. Hermione had told her other best friend back home right? The next day they got up she was on the phone and said to Ginny that she told her everything. That had implied that she was told of the amazing drunken sex that they had had. That was wrong, she should have asked what exactly was said, but didn't. So she thought it only fair that she told her best friend right. Of course she made her swear on her life that she wouldn't tell anybody just in case it got around to Ron. She shouldn't have trusted anybody.
On nights that she would get blazed or take some drinks she would tell Hermione how much she loved her and that she wanted to be with her, but Hermione would only say that that's not fair and that they had both agreed that it was because they were both drunk and loved each other, but not like that. Ginny never agreed to that, it wasn't just because she was drunk.
Then somebody found out. Ginny's friend just couldn't keep her mouth shut. She just couldn't not tell anybody. Ginny had a pissed Hermione walk into her room that night, the night that brought her to hell. She said that Lavender knew and that she thought it was a secret between them and only them.
"You're the one who told your other best friend so why couldn't I?" Ginny already felt like she was dying.
"I didn't tell her."
"You tell her everything that's not true." She was going to lose it real soon.
"I only told her that we got drunk together not about what we did" Ginny didn't believe that.
"I've never betrayed you like this Ginny. I love you and couldn't do that. I've given you everything."
"No you haven't. Not what I wanted. It's okay. I'm sorry. How can I fix this?" Ginny was seriously going downhill fast.
"There's nothing you can do. I have a boyfriend that I love and now everybody will know because the biggest gossip knows." That one stung like hell.
"I'll kill them, everybody who knows. You don't understand how I can't lose you Hermione. You are my everything and I'll do anything that I can to keep you."
"I just have to fix this. I need to talk to Lavender in person tell her not to tell anybody." Hermione walked out of the room. Leaving Ginny like the world had just ripped her insides out and she was hollow.
So she cried. She cried until she threw up and passed out. She woke up on the floor of her room, alone. Why was she alone? Oh yeah she lost all of her friends. The night was hard, but the morning was harder. She couldn't face anybody. They would all know and hate her. So she took the razor that was by her bed for days like this and bled it out. It was nice like she could control this it was good. As she started to cut deeper and deeper it was like her arm went numb, inviting more lacerations. She felt as though she knew for once what she should do. She was making everybody's life too difficult she was doing them a favor really. She felt full now. She was going to be okay. She was glad the last person she saw was Harry walking through the door, the only one who really loved her.
