This thing has been sitting on my hard drive since before 1.10 aired. I'm glad to have finally finished it!
Disclaimer: I don't own Merlin.
Indecent Attire
Morgana was angry. Gwen could tell.
She stormed into her room, with Gwen following her.
"Are you all right, my lady?" Gwen asked, meekly.
"No," Morgana said. "I can't believe that Uther won't do anything! Those people are going to starve to death because of him."
"There was nothing he could do," said Gwen. "He said so."
"I don't believe everything Uther says, and you shouldn't, either." Morgana seemed not quite human when she was angry – there was something wilder about her, something more feral. Gwen had always noticed it. It scared her, but at the same time she couldn't look away. "Poor Merlin."
"Yes," Gwen said. Merlin was her friend, and she knew how much his mother meant to him. Gwen knew the devotion of an only child to their only parent. She'd do anything for her father. "What if..."
"What?" Morgana's voice was softer, the edge gone, her eyes quieter. Gwen was amazed at how quickly she could change emotions, from the fury of hell to quiet compassion.
"Well," said Gwen, with a small gulp, "Merlin's going to go back to Ealdor to help them. Maybe we could... go with him."
"What?" she said again.
"I know how to make weapons, and I trust you haven't forgotten your sparring matches with Arthur?"
That was how Gwen had first seen Morgana. Gwen had been twelve and Morgana thirteen. She'd been scrawny, with long, coltish legs and dark hair about her ears, dressed as a boy. She'd fought with Arthur, using wooden swords. And she'd often won. If Morgana still knew how to fight...
"Of course not," Morgana said, with a smile. "That's a splendid idea, Gwen. If we can help, even a little, we might be able to save them."
"Good. But what are we going to tell Uther?"
"Oh, I'll just send him a note telling him that we're visiting Lady Cornelia," Morgana said, with a smile. Uther hated Lady Cornelia, and thus wouldn't contact her, even to check on his beloved Morgana.
"Brilliant. Should I go and fetch us some boys' clothes?"
"No need. I have some." Morgana went over to her chest of drawers and rifled through her underwear. She pulled out two pairs of trousers, two tunics, and a vest.
"You keep them around?"
"Never know when you'll need them," Morgana said, with a wicked grin that Gwen couldn't help but share.
Morgana turned around, lifted her hair from her back. Gwen hurried over to unlace the back of her dress. Her brown fingers brushed against Morgana's pale skin as she did so. Gwen bit her lip.
"Thank you, Gwen," Morgana said. And then Morgana dropped her dress to the floor.
Gwen turned away as Morgana started to take off her shift. One thing she would never understand about her lady was how casually she could strip in front of other people. Granted, there was nothing Morgana had that Gwen didn't have as well, but she always felt embarrassed when forced to change in the company of others.
In fact, Morgana had never seen Gwen naked.
Gwen couldn't help to peer over her shoulder – just to make sure that Morgana was facing the other way. Morgana was completely naked, and was beginning to pull on her breeches. The black fabric worked its way past her knees, up her white thighs, and eventually passed over her backside. Gwen turned away, blushing slightly.
"Aren't you getting changed, Gwen?"
"L-later," Gwen said. "I have to go and meet Merlin, and give him a sword." She paused for a moment. "Can I turn around?"
Morgana laughed. "Yes, Gwen."
Gwen faced her mistress. Morgana's long hair was still around her shoulders. The trousers... they clung to her skin, leaving no detail to the imagination. Gwen had just seen Morgana's bare legs, but still... They seemed more appealing now, like a wrapped present, just waiting to be...
"Gwen?"
Gwen shook her head, as if trying to shake the sinful thoughts from her head, the thoughts that Gwen hadn't realized, or hadn't remembered, were there. They all came flooding back, every single thought of Morgana as a woman. "I'll be on my way." She turned and walked towards the door.
"What do you think?"
Gwen slowly turned back to face her mistress.
The tunic was baggy, hiding her shape, and her throat was bare.
She had never seen her more beautiful.
"You look amazing, my lady."
"Do you really think?" Morgana smiled that wicked smirk of hers. "You don't think I look like a boy?"
"Not at all!" Gwen knew that when she put on her breeches, she'd look like a boy. But somehow the masculine attire made her lady look more... feminine. More rare.
She'd looked like all of the other women of the court in her rouge and finery. But, dressed as a boy, her natural beauty could shine. And it was that beauty that made Gwen's heart jump. Her thoughts, thoughts of things that one generally reserved for boys. Gwen knew that there were women that enjoyed the company of other ladies, but she'd never...
It occurred to her that, as good as Morgana looked now, she could look even better.
"Of course," Gwen said, "I'd make some adjustments. For security's sake."
Morgana raised an eyebrow. "Really?"
Gwen smiled. "Yes. First, you need a belt for your tunic."
"Why?"
"Because..." To show off her waist. "Because you wouldn't want someone to grab your tunic. If you can keep it closer to your skin, that will be harder."
"I see," Morgana said. For one horrible moment, Gwen realized that Morgana was in on the joke. "And what else?"
Gwen went over to Morgana's wardrobe and picked out a suitable belt. "I'd also tie your hair back." To show off your face, and your neck. "To keep it from getting in your face."
"That's true." Gwen heard Morgana shuffle over to her dresser. Gwen turned to see Morgana tying her hair back with a bit of leather. She held out the belt for her. Morgana finished tying her hair back and took the belt, cinching it around her waist. Gwen wanted to help her, to hold her waist, to...
This was madness! She'd had feelings like this before, but only the smallest urges, the kind that could be buried deep within the mind. Gwen had never felt the real heat of desire, the ache for someone, for Morgana.
But now she did. And she knew she couldn't deny it. She wasn't even sure that she wanted to.
"Anything else?" Morgana asked. Gwen looked her up and down. She was stunning, much more beautiful than Gwen could ever hope to be. There's no chance that she might feel the same way, Gwen reasoned to herself. So what's the harm in looking?
"One more thing," Gwen said. Just to add that final touch of femininity. "A necklace, I think."
"A necklace? How is that supposed to protect me?"
Gwen went over to the dresser and dug around for a particular necklace that would go well with the tunic. Blue, to bring out the blue in Morgana's normally green eyes. Gwen found it, took it out, and fastened it around Morgana's neck.
"To protect your throat." And your heart.
"I see," Morgana said.
Gwen fastened the clasp, but couldn't seem to let go of Morgana's neck. She was so close, so alluring. Gwen's palms flattened against the nape of Morgana's shoulders.
"Gwen?" Morgana whispered.
"Yes, my lady?"
"Do you... do you think I look nice, like this?"
"You always look nice, my lady," Gwen said. "But especially like this."
Morgana's lips were very near. Gwen would only have to lean in the tiniest bit to reach them.
"Do you think that we can make a difference? By going to Ealdor?"
"Honestly, I think that you can do anything you put your mind to."
Morgana laughed at that. And then hands on Gwen's neck.
This couldn't be happening.
"You're very dear to me," Morgana said. "You know that, yes?"
Gwen nodded. She hardly dared to breathe. This couldn't be happening. It had to be a dream.
But then the soft press of pink lips against hers, and Gwen knew this couldn't be a dream. She couldn't have imagined this. She couldn't have made up the gentle yet insistent pressure against her mouth, and how she dared to kiss back. Gwen couldn't have thought up Morgana's tongue, and how her lips automatically knew to open just the right amount. How could a kiss be both completely unlike she had imagined and exactly what she had always hoped it would be?
She'd been longing for it for a lot longer than she'd realized.
Gwen's hands had drifted down to Morgana's waist, her fingers gliding over the smooth leather. When they pulled apart, they continued to touch, neither of them wanting to break contact.
"We'd better..." Gwen said. "Merlin's expecting me."
"Yes," said Morgana, looking down. "I'm sure he does."
Thin locks of hair framed Morgana's face. She looked disappointed. Gwen softly touched her cheek, two fingers against soft flesh. It wasn't much of a gesture, but it was enough.
Enough to reassure Morgana. Enough to confirm that this was real to Gwen.
"You look beautiful," Gwen said. Normally she would've felt overly bold, but what was propriety after what had happened?
"Thank you."
Gwen let go, but not without brushing her hand up Morgana's side, just to feel her skin under the cloth. They'd discuss this, later.
But, for now? Gwen was happy with what they had.
