Okay, okay-- you natives seem to be getting restless,
But you know.. um.. all you have to do is think of it this way
You've just been, you know.. sleeping, yeah, that's right! Sleeping!
And this has all been some crazy acid dream
And yeah, okay, so the plot sucked
and no one believes in fairies anymore..
But it's just a dream, one crazy little acid dream

You don't really want to boo at us like that, do you? nooo, you're nice people, right?
And you'll let us fix this mistake of a play, won't you?
Since I'm so fair and honest and righteous and adorably cute
And if we're lucky enough not to get tomatoes chucked at our heads
We promise tomorrow night's play will go off without a hitch
And if not, well, I guess I'm a liar then.. oh well.

Please send all applause and money and contributions
To the Puck Needs to Find a Date Fund this way
And I promise I'll make everything right again, suuuuuure I do.

Puck sighed as he ran from the New York City Theater audience, "This used to work so well in the dark ages, and at least then when they caught you all you had to worry about was the occasional beheading."