Scars
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Chapter 1
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BPOV(Bella)
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Rose-24, Emmett-25, Bella-26, Edward-30, Alice-28, Jasper-24, Carlisle-49, Esme-39, Andrew-15
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Tuesday, December 31st, 2014.
I had heard about Edward Cullen.
My friends had warned me to avoid him, I agreed easily; I had given up on men long ago. Not that anything would actually happen between the two of us; especially not today.
''Be careful Bella.'' Rose stressed, slipping on her-or rather, my- cobalt blue high heels. ''If I wasn't marrying his brother, he would have hit on me.''
''Why are you warning me? What about Alice?'' My hand was already up to my face, I never actually bit my nails off, just bit them. It let me hide behind something; and to hide the shaking of my hand I could only control if I concentrated hard enough.
Rose looked stunning, she always did, but today; she was virtually glowing. Her wedding dress hugged her bust, controlled her waist and accentuated her hips by poofing out at the hem; a strip of electric blue lace ran up the side, narrowing at the waist where it got thicker again, back up to her bust-her something blue. The dress was new and the veil that landed on her golden hair was her mothers, her something old. She had borrowed my shoes- which surprised me, I wasn't what you would call fashionable, but she fell in love with the dark blue denim high heels.
I thought she would want all white-almost like a fairytale-but she wanted the splash of blue on this one; I was there when she tried it on and it was the best one they had, it fit her. Rose had originally wanted one with some red, but my cousin Alice and I flat out refused.
Alice piped up then, adjusting her boobs in her bridesmaid dress, it was the same electric blue as the lace lining on Rose's dress and had a white ribbon around the waist; mine was identical. ''No offence B, but I've known him for years; he's my partner on the force. He's not as bad as Rose say's, maybe you should go for it.'' Alice winked at me, flicking her cropped raven hair from her face; I stared at her red nails, perfectly unchipped, and wondered how she had such perfect fingernails, then realized that it was too much of a first world problem.
''Do you really think that lowly of me? I'd just go off with some guy? I probably won't even run into him.'' I tried to sound serious; to keep a straight face, but my features failed me, allowing me to giggle freely.
''Yes you will.'' Rose said, before grinning wickedly. ''You're maid of honour, he's best man; he's walking you down the aisle honey.''
Fuck my life.
''He can't be that charming, can he?'' I asked, too nervous to even sip my latte; it was awkward too, trying not to leave a lipstick stain around the rim of my cup.
''I heard he's slept with all the females in on the force, and the office workers.'' Alice shared eagerly; she was always the gossiper out of us, though she didn't go looking for it, and didn't say it casually, only when it came up in conversation.
''Yeah?'' I retorted. ''They were probably just lonely, horny people who weren't getting any.'' I dismissed her comment.
Alice snorted. ''But half of them are married!'' A look of pure terror crossed her face as she and Rose looked at me, their hair whipping, smiles fading.
I looked away from the pricing eyes, avoiding the subject of married people cheating. ''I stick to my original statement.'' I declared firmly, avoiding eye contact. ''They were probably just lonely, horny people who weren't getting any.''
Alice's hazelnut eyes turned mocking. ''Honey, you're a lonely, horny person who isn't getting any.'' She noted calmly, Rose snickered, fidgeting with her silver bangles.
''There's a difference.'' I argued; a smile creeping onto my face.
''Which is?'' Rose asked, touching up her mascara and lipstick; though she didn't need to.
I pointed both of my thumbs at myself. ''I'm not a slut.'' Of course I didn't mean it literally; or that if I did sleep with some guy that I would be.
Alice and Rose both turned to look at each other, unable to hold it in anymore, they burst into laughter; I chuckled uneasily, I had succeeded in lightening the mood.
''Hey.'' I shouted. ''Ugh, come on Rose, let's do this, its one o'clock- time to get you hitched!'' I cheered, a large grin illuminated her face; making her more striking then she already was.
''I'm getting married.'' She murmured in awe, she blinked back tears and I tried not to cry with her, Rose was not one for showing emotion.
''That is, of course, if Emmett goes through with it.'' I joked lightly, trying to duck out of the way as Rose punched me, but she clipped my arm.
That brought me to the thought of Emmett, who was almost twenty-six whilst Rose was twenty four, almost twenty-five. Emmett popped the question when she was twenty-two, they had planned to get married when Rose graduated college- with her engineering degree- but she miscarried on their first child and they postponed it for a year.
''I'm joking.'' I laughed.
''Besides.'' Alice said, reaching for her pink bouquet. ''I'll arrest him if he misses this wedding.''
''Arrest him for what?'' I wondered, grabbing my bouquet too, if not only to fiddle with it.
''Being a dick.'' She said, rolling her eyes; as if it were obvious.
''If you arrested every man who has ever been a dick there'd be no men left.'' I pointed out, messing with the hem of the ribbon on my dress.
''True.'' She mused; Rose clapped her hands sharply to grab our attention, I didn't look up but imagined her blue eyes sparkling and afraid; while every other feature was marked on looking pissed at us.
''Great now that you two just had the most random fucking conversation ever. I'm late, and not fashionably.'' She snipped; though I glanced at my phone and we still had a while.
''Oh god fine, let's go!'' Alice urged. We had been getting ready at my house. Rose was avoiding her ex, (Royce) who had recently made surprise appearance, trying to get her back, so her house was out for fear of the stalking ex.
So was Alice's, her roommate was home and a real pain, honestly, I don't know how Alice put up with Lauren. The woman might crack her face if she smiled, but then again, I wouldn't kid myself into thinking she could smile.
So that singled out my house.
In true Rose fashion, we were going to travel in a sleek, black limo, a big white bow draped around it. Before we climbed in, Rose ripped the bow off, I stared at her-"Tacky." she explained, I agreed telepathically; only she could be right today.
The journey there was filled with champagne and talk about Rose's mystery honeymoon, Emmett hadn't told her where they were going, it was a surprise; but it's always been her dream to travel Europe. While they chattered, my mind wandered to Edward Cullen. Alice knew him first, being two years older than us (also my first cousin and best friend). Alice was on the police force for a year when she got a new partner; Edward Cullen.
She raved and ranted about him, there was an office Christmas party on three years ago, Edward brought Emmett, his brother and Alice brought Rose (I was sick and insisted that they go without me) that was where Rose and Em met, it took him two weeks to ask her out and a year to propose. I met Em a month after the party, but I had yet to meet Edward.
But I had seen the pictures.
His untidy hair, in permanent 'I-just-had-amazing-wild-sex' style; it was bronze, an unusual colour, it reminded me of Alice's mother's color. His eyes were a piercing green that took the bones from my legs and a smirk that I didn't forget
''. . .and I haven't seen him in for years!'' Rose exclaimed, I assumed she was talking about her twin brother, Jasper, who had just finished a tour in Iraq. Ordered home with PTSD, no one knew exactly what happened out there, and I don't think I could handle it. He was glad to be back in New York for the wedding; having been worried he would have to miss it. I knew how much it meant to Rose and Emmett; who already thought Jasper to be a brother.
Though him coming home with PTSD scared me some, what might trigger it? Loud sudden noises? Fireworks, explosions, or simple scars? ''Do you know what sets him off?'' I wondered, my voice barely a whisper, I had a lot of bad luck; I was like a black cloud of destruction.
They both turned to look at me, Alice scooted down the seats and wrapped her arms around me. ''Your fringe is so secure in place, and it's covered, you barely notice it, honestly.''
I sniffled, placing my hands on Alice's arm, looked up at Rose and blinked back tears. ''I'm sorry.'' I muttered. ''I didn't mean to. . .'' I wasn't sure how to continue, ruin this day by turning it into a Bella sob fest? She cut me off anyway.
''Bella, I think you are perfect, you know that, right? And, I really wouldn't suggest this if I didn't have to, but you're hurting, honey, let me pay for. . .''
''No.'' My voice was cold, uncaring; even if I knew she suggested this for me and maybe I would have been more grateful if I hadn't contemplated it a million times over, now even the mention of it just got to me.
''I don't think you need it, but I want you to feel confident, comfortable.'' She assured me. ''You two are the nicest, well maybe not nice really, but if you were nice you wouldn't be my bridesmaids. You're decent people, funny and you recognize when enough is enough. I don't think you need it, but I think you think you do; you just won't admit it to yourself.''
''Maybe.'' I allowed, or maybe I've already admitted it to myself but don't want to speak of it. It would have been easier to just have laser surgery for the scar; but I think I want to keep it as a reminder.
She nodded, understanding. The limo came to a stop, but my mind reminded me of all those horror stories of surgery going wrong and I'd rather stay like this, it was only a small scar after all.
Alice got out first, followed by me and then Rose, Alice grumbled, 'it goes from least important to most'. There were some people gathered around, gasping and gawking when they saw the dress, the guests made their way back inside, someone informed everyone the bride had arrived and the music began.
We entered the church and I found it hard to concentrate when my eyes zoned in on Edward, Rose put me beside him and Alice beside Jasper, after she hugged the air out of him. ''So, Bella, have you met Jasper before?'' Edward's voice was a low hum in my ear, I tried not to think about anything apart from cursing the silk dress to hell, the design meant I couldn't wear a bra.
But it was cold, very cold, good enough excuse, though nothing was a good excuse for his staring. ''Yes, once, he came home for Christmas and surprised Roseā¦'' I trailed off, he wasn't listening anyway. Only staring, but he must have been paying attention to his surroundings because he looped his arm with mine and pulled me along when it was our cue to leave. I ignored the warmth that spread through me when we touched and I ignored the way my arm fit with his, and I definitely ignored the way he smirked down at me.
Stupid arrogant ass.
The ceremony flew by; Alice had entered the church after me and Edward, Jasper on her arm, followed by Rose. Jasper looked so different from the last time I had seen him. His blond hair was cropped short; though Rose had told me how his hair had been shoulder length for most of his life. He had Rose's bright blue eyes too; you could tell they were twins. Their father had disowned them both when Rose ended her relationship with Royce after he became too crazy to handle and Jasper took her side. She asked Emmett and Edward's father to walk her down the aisle; which I found sweet, I had met Carlisle on multiple occasions.
The church was cold and smelt like freesias and lilacs; the smell overpowered me.
That's all I remember.
At the reception in the hotel, my speech was short and sweet, like Alice told me.
''I have known Rose since we shared an apartment in college together, she and Alice have been there for me at my worst, as have I at her's. You are my sister. I haven't known Emmett as long, but when I saw his giant childlike face I knew he was perfect for Rose. You guys have had your up's and down's, but in the end you love each other and I love you both.''
Alice wrote it for me, Rose didn't need to know that.
I saw Emmett talking to who I presumed was his nephew; did I mention that Edward was a thirty-year-old with a fifteen-year-old son? No? well, everything has some baggage, though I wouldn't exactly call a child baggage.
I excused myself then to go to the bathroom. Feeling nervous for some reason, my stomach dropped and a thick lump formed in my throat, making it hard to swallow.
After a five minute walk I arrived, but not before I took ten wrong turns, this hotel was massive, but I suppose it had to be to fit all of Rose and Emmett's guests. I did my business quickly, walking out of the stall I caught someone just leaving, halfway through the door. That's when I understood why I had the sinking feeling.
''Leah?'' I asked. ''What are you doing here?'' She was dressed as a waiter, like the ones who had delivered our food, her hair was cropped short up to her ears, it is pure black, and used to be long and shiny, like her mother's.
She shrugged, an evil glint in her dark brown eyes. ''Were you invited?'' I asked wearily, knowing she hadn't been, I actually remember Rose saying there was 'no way in hell that bitch would be near my wedding.'
''Yes.'' She said easily. ''Me and Emmett are on very good terms.'' Leah was Emmett's ex, she was still hopelessly in love with him, and wouldn't give up, I had to get her out of there, I was torn between washing my hands or following her.
By this time, however, I had drunk two glasses of wine and was slightly tipsy.
I don't usually drink much, but I would regret it in the morning.
Especially since Leah slipped out of the room then. I wet my hands lightly, that would have to do. I ran after her, speeding down the hall of the hotel the reception had been held in. My shoes were starting to annoy me, so I took them off and hiked up my dress slightly.
I really hated alcohol, it fogged up my brain and memory. Rose and Emmett were talking about getting a restraining order put on Leah, I supported them, though they understood why I wouldn't, her being my kind of ex-step sister and all. Her mother Sue had married my dad, Charlie, and I had barely spoken to Leah since our parents both died when I was seventeen.
My foot caught my other one when I was almost back at reception, of course. I sucked in a breath and threw my shoes to one side, preparing to kiss the ground gracefully when strong arms wrapped around my waist, halting my fall and groping my boob.
''Hey.'' I hit the hand away, outraged. His hand moved to my arm quickly.
Edward held up his hands, smiling slightly. My heart fluttered. ''Sorry, accident.''
''Ugh, I don't care, seriously, Leah's here.'' His hand flexed on my arm, his eyes grew wary instead of mocking and he frowned.
''Shit.'' He hissed, clamping his eyes shut before reopening them. ''Which way did she go?''
''I don't know, got a bit distracted with the boob groping, which was not appreciated by the way.'' I raised an eyebrow. I think he sensed my lie, strangely, I liked the groping.
He smirked. ''Common.'' He sighed, picking up my shoes. ''We have a wedding to save.''
:::
EPOV(Edward)
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I sighed, staring into the sexy eyes of this goddess. ''Come on.'' I ordered. Deciding to save her the trouble, I picked up her shoes. They were death traps. ''We have a wedding to save.''
She rolled her brown eyes. ''Let's do this.'' She said. ''You can let go of my arm now.''
''No thank you.'' I replied. ''I'm not missing the chance to walk into a room with a beautiful girl on my arm.''
''How many other girls have you called beautiful?'' She glared at me, trying to break her arm free, this time I let her.
There it is; my past come's back to haunt me again.
Groping her didn't help either.
''Not many.'' I defended quietly. ''Not recently.''
She looked at me quizzically, not understanding. I shrugged, sparing her the gory details of my messed up life. We made it back to reception in silence, she seemed to be concentrating hard on something.
It took us a few minutes to get there, I opened the door for her and that's when I spotted Leah, her hair was cropped and it was hard to pick her out from the crowd, but I did, she was wearing a waiter's outfit, carrying four glasses of wine, heading straight for Rose, her white dress shone like a beacon.
Leah was only a few feet away from Rose when Bella suddenly dashed away from my side and hurtled towards Leah. She got there just in time, Leah was just about ready to throw the wine when Bella crashed into her, red spilled over her and Leah as the glasses shattered close to Bella's face.
''Bella!.'' Rose gasped, going over to her; but I got there first, picking her up, security came over and escorted Leah away. Thankfully it was my day off.
''Oh thank you!'' Rose exclaimed. ''Best MOH ever!''
I looked at Emmett, he stared back. ''MOH?'' he mouthed, I shrugged, pretending not to know. I wish I didn't, but thanks to a certain pixie I knew. Maid of honour.
Emmett came over to me, passing me another beer, my brain was foggy enough but I accepted it anyway. The girls chatted about what a bitch Leah was and after more speeches; cake and dancing, Emmett and Rose left the reception.
''We're touring Europe! Starting with Ireland.''
Emmett was giddy; he had always wanted to visit Ireland.
Rose turned to Alice and Bella. ''I'll bring you back a leprechaun.'' She squealed.
''Good luck with that.'' Bella said, laughing slightly.
Her laugh engrossed me, I couldn't understand it, I hadn't been with any woman for almost a year, I had been on dates, lots of dates, shared kisses and touches-but it never led anywhere, it could have gone on to something more, well, with most of them, but something was different, something wasn't right, I wasn't right.
But ever since she had linked her arms with me in the church I couldn't help myself when I was around her.
Damn. I needed to get laid.
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BPOV(Bella)
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I had drunk too much.
I made it back to the hotel room, it just wasn't my hotel room. The door clicked shut behind us and then I was pressed against the wall, his lips found mine, needy and passionate.
Edward groaned, pressing himself to me.
I had definitely drunk too much.
I would regret this in the morning, but right now I was getting lost in a kiss as we somehow found the bed in our haze.
That's all I remember.
I woke up the next day, head banging, completely naked, legs tangled with Edward's. Edward, who was also naked, had wrapped his arms around me, I was curled into his side.
''Shit.'' I groaned, trying to pull away.
His grip tightened around my waist, I frantically broke my hand free to flatten down my hair, it was still in place, I don't know how Alice did it. She should have been a fashion designer, not a police officer.
Slowly, last night began to filter back to me.
Oh god.
I slept with someone I barely knew.
Alice and Rose would never let me live this down.
''Bella.'' Edward moaned, pulling my chest flush with his.
I managed to wiggle free, then started to hunt down my clothes.
''Come back to bed.'' He grumbled, I had scooped up my dress and handbag, clutching them to me, trying to cover myself.
''No thanks.'' I dismissed, though I felt a strong pull to get back under the covers.
''Look, the shit you hear about me might be true. . .but then again it might be as fake as the woman who told you it.''
He got up and stretched out, standing at the foot of the bed.
''What's that supposed to mean?'' I questioned, feeling the grip I had on my things loosen slightly.
He shrugged, smirking. I felt my heartbeat increase. ''It means whatever you want it to.''
''Fine.'' I sighed, dropping my things completely, feeling the pull take over. He raised his eyebrows.
I walked over to him, pushing him down on the bed, straddling his waist. ''This means nothing, got it?'' I asked, he nodded, smiling widely. ''Time for round four.'' My eyes gleamed.
''Oh Bella, how drunk were you?'' He placed his hands on my hips, one hand stayed there, rubbing circles, moving dangerously lower. His other hand traveled up my spine, stopping in-between my shoulder blades. He pushed me down to whisper in my ear. ''This is round five.''
He flipped us suddenly so I was on my back, I made sure my hair was still in place, covering my face.
I had never done this before.
And I would never do it again.
I would walk away from him.
In an hour.
If any of you find this fanfiction familiar do not worry. This story used to be called 'Internal Love' and was posted by me under the name 'DipdyeGirl93' up until chapter ten. Now I have the fanfiction mostly done and it's completely different and Edited. If you do not believe me go check out the story on my other account and see I have posted saying the story's here. I will update every Monday and Thursday, so next update is on Thursday. Please review if you liked it, or even if you didn't. Also thank you to my beta tweetyviolet. Thank you ;)xxx
-BATTM
