Beacon by Falafal

Authors notes: I started to write this songfic a short time ago when I was having some difficulties with my life but never finished it. When I found it recently I decided it needed completing. Check it out. What do you think?

"Speech" 'Thoughts' ~ Lyrics ~

WIth Amity Dry's "The Lighthouse"

~ The worst thing is the silence ringing in my ears And waking up from a dream to remember you're not here ~

Gohan awoke with erratic breathing, glistening sweat upon his forehead. The regular nightmares had his mind twisting, heavy, sorrowed. Yet he wished with the entirety of his soul to return to his sleeping dream no matter how torturous moments seemed to become. Because he was there. Right beside him. His smiling face, warm eyes, so close the half-saiyan believed he was truly there. Moments later paired fingers would touch his forehead, disappearing.

Each morning would begin the same, sitting on the side of his bed, resting his head in his hands as he removed the tears, which formed. Allowing no one to see this side of him.

"Gohan, are you up?"

And for a flash he would think the being had returned, before realisation set in,

'He's gone, father is gone'

~ And some days I'm so lonely I can barely even breathe ~

It was the sun that burned his skin, the familiar river water touching his skin, the twinkle of silver scales beneath the surface that would remind him of his isolation. Memories of those father-son fishing trips, those trips which would see Chi-chi's face redden, steam visibly rise from her ears. Alone he would reenact this activity over and over again. As the fish tower grew Gohan's energy diminished until he collapsed breathless upon the soft bank.

~ But then something will remind me that you're still here with me. ~

Upon touching down on his return, the front door would sweep open, shaking the aging hinges. The miniature version of his mentor floating warmly into an embrace. Laughing, smiling, reminding.

"You're home!"

His younger brother pushed back and looked up into Gohan's eyes, a hereditary spark rising to the surface.

"Can we go training?"

Yes, he was still here. Still watching, waiting. He had departed yet remained. Placing a gentle hand on the young boy's dark hair, Gohan whispered his thoughts,

"He's right here"

~ And you're the lighthouse leading me home Guiding me through every storm You're the sun that shines on my face The warming embrace, the light of my days You're the lighthouse ~

"Oh no you don't!"

Chi-chi appeared suddenly in the doorway, hands on her hips although a warm smile lit her face,

"You're late Gohan, come in and help with lunch"

Swinging Goten onto his back, the eldest son willingly let those around him take him in, warm his inside. He belonged.

"We better go in kiddo.Before mother discovers she has a pair of rather disobedient children"

Goten giggled at his brother's tone, gripping him tightly about his shoulders. Forgetting about his morning grieves, his family kept him standing, sane. They held his mind, he held theirs. Together they allowed each other's days to past.

~ I long to hear your laughter, to look into your eyes And I miss the way we used to talk until the sun would rise ~

'That was his chair'

Food hesitating by his mouth, Gohan stared at the empty chair across the wooden table. The spot remained empty, a silent dedication. A smile slipped across his face at remembrance of past midnight conversations. Conversations, which would braid its way through the events of their lives. Past battles, laughs, friends. The sun would hint at the horizon yet their laughter would continue, up until his mother's voice would echo into the room.

"Gohan?"

The innocent voice of his brother brought him out of thought to find small eyes watching him. Gohan but smiled in return and continued his lunch as if nothing had occurred.

~ And some days I'm so angry you were taken far too soon ~

Gohan tightened his fist as he glared upon the photo. His mother and the grinning face of his father. So many nights he had heard the hidden weeping coming from his supposed sleeping, mother.

'He could have returned. Why didn't he?'

Before he new what happened the frame, which held the picture was flying, soaring.

~ But I know you're right beside me, And you're carrying me through ~

Staring at the fallen frame he was surprised to find it totally intact, excepting a hairline fracture streaking vertically down his father's form. Running his finger down the break, a shiver ran down his spine.

*Gohan.*

The silent voice rung through his mind, causing him to spin his head about the room. But no one was there. The mid day sun lit up the room, creating no corners, no shadows.

~ And you're the lighthouse leading me home Guiding me through every storm You're the sun that shines on my face The warming embrace, the light of my days You're the lighthouse ~

"Gohan?"

The saiyan descendant started, jumping up from his kneeling position. A soft voice radiated from the doorway, newly familiar.

"Did I scare you?"

"You could never scare me, Videl"

Placing the injured picture back upon the shelf he turned to embrace the famous yet calming young woman. Her breath prickled his neck as she spoke,

"Are you ok?"

"Hmm"

"I know you Gohan. Perhaps not as long as others yet I know you"

"I was just thinking Videl, that's all"

Bringing her head back she placed a gently sincere kiss on his cheek, then softly upon his lips. Leaning into his chest quite tears began to touched her eyes,

"Please don't leave me"

Wiping her tears with his index finger he whispered into her hair,

"I'll never leave you, never"

~ And I swear that I can feel you Your breathe upon my skin And whenever I need you I can hear you whispering ~

Below the wind swept sea caressed the jagged cliffs. His memories impressed itself permanently on this site, their site. He would be the only one to visit it's height, the bare grass, dancing breeze, damping mist. Falling to his knees he placed a graceful rose, the memorial upon the cliff edge. As the wind waltzed with its red petals, Gohan swore a hand touched his shoulder, a warm breath on his cheek. Yet with knowledge of his isolation the teen did not turn, his eyes didn't leave the ground before him.

"Why did you leave?"

//I did not leave. My soul will always watch over you//

A contented smile slowly formed upon his face, the rose was picked up dancing through the air, floating over the sea below.

Alone Gohan watched the sun begin to sink from its peak, the memorial flower disappeared beneath the waves.

~ And you're the lighthouse leading me home ~

A strong presence silently made itself known behind him. Turning his head, his close and supportive friend, no family bowed his head in support.

"Come, they're waiting for you"

"I know Piccilo" standing up "just something I needed to do"

"I'll always be here when you need me, Gohan"

"Thankyou"

~ Guiding me through every storm ~

"Hey! Gohan, Piccilo!"

On arrival at the large building, which was the Capsule Corp home, a small silver headed boy leapt from the opening doors, waved furiously, Goten on his heals. The high held figure of his father's once foe walked out after them, arms crossed sternly over his chest. The aging saiyan watched them land without word.

"Where have you been?"

Scruffing Trunks hair not too gently Gohan replied,

"Just been about squirt"

~ You're the sun that shines on my face ~

Inside the laughs bounced off the walls, stories touched his ears. All heads turned as they entered the hall, a particular figure approached them.

"Cheer up Vegeta!"

The bald headed Krillin, lifetime friend, punched the proud saiyan impishly. A scowl came across the prince's face, yet made no move.

"It's been a time. What've you been up to?"

Krillin's smile lit up those around him as he spoke to Gohan,

"High School, Krillin"

"It's good for you" the short man took hold of Gohan's elbow and lead the small group towards the others.

~ The warming embrace, the light of my days ~

Videl's welcoming embrace touched him once more that day, making him feel he was indeed needed. His mother and Bulma giggled as the champagne swirled in their crystal glasses. Dende waved, Mr. Popo nodded his head. Tian and Yamcha standing over the burning steaks, grilling onion, and 'kiss the cook' aprons caused Gohan to laugh aloud.

The first true laugh in many days. He let them him in, sit him down, cradle his thoughts.

~ You're the lighthouse ~

'I know you've left my life but you knew they'd embrace the loss I feel'

One long table, each member of his life filled a chair, even the world martial arts champion, Hercule, for the respect he held. Then there was silence, the chime of spoon against crystal holding back speech. Standing Gohan raised his glass,

"I'd like to make a toast."

At his words every glass full, midway, drizzle was lifted into the air.

".to belonging, family, friends. I'd like to toast the entire group for you are my lighthouse, my beacon"