A Log Forgotten
Disclaimer: I do not own any series of Star Trek or any of its characters.
"My dearest Data, I write this in hope that one day you will truly understand this. I know that you say you have no emotion, but I think you deceive yourself. One day maybe you will truly understand what I felt for you. I hope that day will come soon and I hope that I will still be around when it happens, but if not this will be given to you when Captain Picard determines you are ready for this. There is so much that I want to say to you. First I would like to say that if I have already passed on when you get this, then do not grieve for me. I hope at this point you are close to your goal of truly being human. And I hope that at this point you will understand just how human you truly were when I wrote this, your comprehension of our ethics and your love for life and discovery made you more human than any of us were at times. One thing I want to clear up is that when I said "it never happened" I was a little harsh. I came to you that day acting on feelings that already existed. Listen to me rambling on, there is so much more I would like to say, but I can not collect all my thoughts. I hope this will be the first of many more entries I will write to you as time goes on." Computer save and store to pad.
Tasha picked up the pad and headed out into the corridor. Along the way she acknowledged the shipmates who passed. She got into the turbo lift and said "Bridge".
As she waited she thought about what she had just written and felt good that she had finally worked up the courage to say these things, even if she didn't actually have the courage to say it to his face. Eventually she would and this was just the first step. The doors opened onto the bridge, and seeing that Riker was sitting in the command chair, she headed towards the ready room. She pressed the panel, which would alert the captain that someone wished to see him. "Enter" he said in his usual reply.
"Ah, Tasha is there something on your mind?"
"Well I wanted you to do something for me, Sir."
"Yes, well tell me and I'll see what I can do."
"Well, Sir, I wanted you to hold on to something for me."
"I'd be happy to, but what is it." he said reaching for the pad she had held out.
"It's a message"
"Well I'm not sure I'm the one suited to deliver this."
"It would mean a lot to me, Sir, if you would."
"Okay, but who is it to and when do I deliver this message."
"Well it's to Data, sir, when you determine that he is emotionally ready for it."
"But Data has no emotion."
"I know sir that's why I said when he was emotionally ready for it. I want you to give it to him when you think that he can understand the emotional aspects of it."
"I understand, but wouldn't it be better if someone closer to Data gave it to him?"
"No, Sir, it would mean more to me if you gave it to him."
"I will handle it" he said in a solemn tone.
"Thank you, Sir." she said as she left the ready room. She decided that she would take her shift early today.
"Captain I am receiving an emergency transmission from shuttlecraft 13."
"On main viewer." says the captain in his customary style.
"I can't sir, we're receiving audio only."
"Open a frequency."
"Ay sir."
"Sir, I have an onboard systems failure, you'll have to tell me where I am."
"I read your coordinates at 370.236 confirm"
"I can't confirm my systems are haywire."
"Lieutenant is the councilor alright?" the captain asked in a concerned tone.
"I'm losing more power, flight control's fried."
"Main engineering how long before we can return to warp power."
"Captain I'm in the middle of realigning the dilithium crystal , it'll be twenty minutes maybe more."
"You don't have that long." the captain responds.
"I'll align it by hand."
"Whatever it takes."
"Ay Sir."
"Ben, you're dangerously close to a planet."
"I can see it, but I can't avoid it, we're going down."
This thing won't let us pass. What kind of right does it have to deny us the passage so we can help our people. The commander tried diplomacy, but it didn't work. I don't care what it says I'm going to help our people. Tasha thought as the commander talked to armus.
"We are not going without our shuttle crew." she says
"I warn you…" the creature starts.
"Enough, we have people who need attention, we won't hurt you, but we must help them." she said as she started toward the shuttle craft and was hurled away. Doctor Crusher rushed towards her as the commander and Data fired on it with their phasers.
"She's dead!" the doctor reported
"Beam them up!" the captain said. "Go to yellow alert Mr. Worf, I'll be in sickbay."
"Status doctor." the captain asked as he walked into sickbay.
"Unchanged, we'll try to bring her back."
"The doctor tried to bring you back, she kept increasing the charge and she didn't want to give up, but she had to call the time. Your program you prepared for us was a pleasant way for us to say goodbye. But we all still miss you." The captain reminisced as he held the pad she had given him so long ago. "I did not forget, I will give this to Data now that he is finally ready." he said as he left his ruined ready room. AN: This is just after the Enterprise: D crashed on Star Trek: Generations.
"Excelsior, one to beam up" he said, and then the beam started to envelope him.
"Everything ok sir." Riker said as the captain stepped off the transporter pad.
"It is now number one, I just forgot something." he said reassuring his first officer.
They began walking out of the transporter room, but then the captain paused at the entrance.
"All you all right sir?" Riker asked with a concerned look on his face.
"I just realized we will never see her again will, we will never visit alien races, or negotiate treaties in her again." the captain said with a little emotion showing in his voice.
"I know it seems weird doesn't it sir, It seems like the only ship I've known and would ever want to know has been stripped from us."
"Oh there will be another one, but it will never be the same. No use in morning over it anymore at least most of the crew survived."
"I guess you're right sir, that is one thing we have to be thankful for."
"Do you know where Commander Data's quarters are?"
"I believe its on deck three along with most of the senior staff. Why do you ask?"
"I need to give this to him." he said holding up the pad. Riker gave him a questioning glance.
"Just a promise number one, just a promise." he said anticipating the coming question.
"Come in" the android said
"Mr. Data, I see you found your cat."
"Yes sir, I am glad that I did, it was a quite intriguing emotional experience." he said in a matter of fact way.
"Is your emotion chip functioning correctly now?"
"Yes Geordi and I corrected the problem. Why do you ask sir?"
"Well, I was concerned that you weren't experiencing emotions properly."
"Are you evaluating my ability to perform my duties."
"No, no nothing like that I just needed to know. I was instructed to give you this by a friend when you were emotionally ready for it." he said handing him the pad.
"Who gave it to you sir."
"It was given to me by Tasha, shortly before she died. It was very important to her that I give this to you when you had emotions if she didn't survive long enough to see that day herself."
"What did she put in it sir."
"I don't know. I never looked at it, even after she was gone. I didn't want to invade her privacy or yours."
"I understand."
"Data, this is something you should explore alone, so I will leave you, but I would suggest that you talk to Councilor Troi, within the next couple of days."
"Yes, I think I will do that sir." with that the captain exited from Data's quarters.
At first the flood of emotions and questions were almost to much for even an android to handle. The thought of turning off the emotion chip crossed his mind but he decided that Tasha had wanted him to be emotionally ready for what she had said. He felt what he could only describe as a mix of anxiousness and sadness. And so strengthening his resolve he turned the pad on and began to read.
By the time Data had gotten to the end of the message he was in tears. This was only the second time since he had his emotion chip that he had cried, and this time it wasn't for a happy reason. He felt as if he had been crying for hours, while his internal chronometer told him it had only been ten minutes. The emotions that he never could experience when Tasha had died had all come to him one fading into another, only to be replaced by yet another. Finally he could understand what love really was, why he kept a holographic picture of her, for every personal emotional aspect he finally had an answer, but what he still didn't understand was what Tasha had felt for him. He finally understood that he had had basal emotions all along, but he would have to struggle for a long time to understand why Tasha had initially had emotions for him even though at the time he could only have rudimentary emotions. Data realized that this was the kind of question that could take a lifetime to answer and that he would have a hard time getting used to the emotions that came with questions of this nature. But he mustn't spend to much time dealing with these questions, because life was going to go on and he would be even more busy if they decided to build another Enterprise.
AN: Well I hope you liked it. The end of it was kind of rushed, because I didn't really know what to write once Data got the pad, but overall I'm pleased with the way it came out. Please Review.
