IT IS A DARK AND STORMY NIGHT...(nature can be relied on to produce a dark and stormy night once a month for the purposes of eldritch rites, picking rare herbs and of course the dancing without yer drawers on. On this night you can hardly move for young women wearing (or then again not wearing...hurhur) lacy dresses, floppy black hats, three inches of white make up and black nail varnish. )

On this night, in a tiny wash shed outside a cottage in Lancre, Three Witches are gathered around a copper basin doing some eldritch rite. They are not your usual witches (see description above) and they very definitely are wearing their cloths (hurhur). One looks like a current, one looks like a prune and one looks like a Magrat. The currant is chanting...

"In the poison'd entrails throw - look is this really necessary? Only our Jason's gel is cooking dinner and I got to supervise. Sometimes she tries that cwiseenystuff"

"Nanny ,please? Its traditional-you have to do it"

"Oh all right but I don't want this entrails stuff"

"Granny?"

"I don't hold with entrails."

"I guess it is rather violent- Nanny is there anything else we can use?"

"Knotted stockings"

"Knotted stockings?"

"This is a wash shed"

"Ok, I guess we can try it-In the knotted stockings throw Toad, that under cold stone,"

"Where? I got a stick here, ill kill it."

"I can't be havin with toads"

"I do have a rubber duck..."

"This is getting stranger by the minuterubber duck that in lukewarm bath"

"Dunt rhyme."

"I can't make it Rhyme! It won't go"

"Just carry on love"

"Ok; Days and nights has thirty-one; Swelter'd venom"

"Do rubber ducks have venom?"

"Sleeping got, Boil thou first I' the charmed pot!"

"Boil? We aren't eating the rubber duck are we? Mind you might taste better than oat cwiseeny.

"Horse food? What would you want to eat horse food for Gytha Ogg?"

"I'm sure our Jason's gel could tell you" "Double, double toil and trouble...you're supposed to chant it with me!!"

"I Dont hold with chanting"

"Nanny? Please?"

"Orright then gel, one two three... Double, double toil and trouble; Fire burn, and caldron bubble. "

"Ok what's next?"

"Fillet of a fenny snake"

"We got a wooden snake"

"oh, well maybe it will work... body of a wooden snake In the caldron boil and bake; Eye of newt, and toe of frog, Wool of bat, and tongue of dog, Adder's fork, and blind-worm's sting,"

"Ok we got marbles, chicken feet, a woolly scarf, tomorrow nights pork chop, a pewter fork and a dead caterpillar"

"Not very...eldritch perhaps."

"Who's going to know?"

"Well have at least got...

Lizard's leg and owlet's wing,— for a charm of powerful trouble, Like a hell-broth boil and bubble?"

"No"

"Ah...come on nanny Double, double toil and trouble; Fire burn, and caldron bubble. "

" Scale of dragon(shiny glass); tooth of wolf(sheep's really ); Witches' mummy"

"What would I want to cook my mother for? That's a mistake."

"It's what it says in the book granny"

"Meant to be witches...funny. Yes someone tell a joke"

"Well there was a man a picture frame and a pair of curtains"

"NOT YOU GYTHA"

"Ok ah...why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side"

"Awful joke. Get on with it Magrat."

"Ah ok yes... maw and gulf of the ravin'd salt-sea shark..."

Sometimes Magrat thinks it might just be easier to throw her caution and clothing (hurhur) to the wind. Might be easier than trying to get these two9 bats to do anything...