"Let me get this straight, Ryuuzaki." Light's right eyebrow twitched in annoyance. He felt his vein at his forehead throb. He opened his eyes revealing pure irritation written all over (the Kira suspect's) Kira's face. L only blinked. He seemed perfectly unaware of the drama Light was having. "Yes?"

"We're here to discuss all about Death Note with the rest of the cast at our break time?" Light snarled,

"That is correct, Light-kun." L smiled as he licked his fork that had white icing all over from digging it down to his beloved cake.

"What would Tsugumi-san say about this… this preposterous things? We still need to rehearse the scene where Higuchi will get arrested and not to mention the meeting we'll have to talk about about the part where Mello and Near comes in with Obata-san." Light pointed at his PDA.

"Nah, Tsugumi already agreed to this thing anyway, Kira!" Mello bit the tip of his chocolate bar. Matt looked up from his Nintendo DS, "You know, this Death Note game's a pretty good one. Anyway, we just need to put the disclaimer for the author."

"That's right. You don't need to worry about our tight schedule." L looked at Light, "Now for the disclaimer."

Light sighed. He might as well get over it.

DISCLAIMER: The author does not own Death Note but Tsugumi Ohba and Takeshi Obata do. If she did, she would make filler episodes but not as much as Naruto. That's another thing.

"Da-Da-Da-Dum!!! Misa-Misa's here to introduce the Death Note cast!!!" Her voice was dripping with glee. Light, on the other hand was right beside her. He couldn't help but cover his right ear to prevent his eardrums to shatter. Light looked at her, "Most of the viewers already know us." Misa's eyes started to swell up, "Light-kun doesn't want Misa to help??"

Light could feel a glare burning through his skin. His head turned slowly to reveal a glimpse of a horrifying angered shinigami named Rem. 'Oh crap. This is definitely turning to a disaster. The only way to stop Rem from creating fantasies of me being tortured/dead is to be nice to Misa. Damn, why are Rem and Misa here anyway?!' He gave one of his sweetest smiles that made any girl melt, "I want you to help. Now cheer up. I don't want you looking all sad like that,"

Is it just Light or did he saw hearts in Misa's eyes for a second?

"Oh, Light-kun!!! Misa will be happy for you!!" Misa exclaimed while cuddling Light. Light just turned his exasperated face away to the audience. 'Yeah, all this girl does is hug...'

Light jumped a bit as he saw L popped out of nowhere in front of him, "E-Eh?" L smiled while Light sighed, "Don't do that again, Ryuuzaki."

"You still call me that name. You can call me L," He said,

"I'm fine with Ryuuzaki. Now, what do we do?" Light tried to shake Misa off like she was a parasite attempting to bite his arm.

"We have to wait for Mello, Near and Matt." L declared. Light just scratched his head with his cuffed hand--- wait. Cuffed? He glowered at L, "Why is this in my arm?!!"

"Because I am supposed to observe you closely and see anything suspicious about you that might increase the chances of you being Kira." L's voice turned serious. Light just slapped his own face without thinking, "This is a stage prop—meaning Death Note's a show. Don't you get it?? I AM KIRA." L's eyes just widened for a moment then followed by a brief silence.

"So you admit you are Kira and your death penalty?"

Light's anger began to raise, "What?!—Death penalty—Kira--- Ryuuzaki!! Haven't you heard my last statement?"

"Yes, you said you are Kira." L pointed out like it was obvious.

'No—the other statement!!!"

"You mean, "Don't you get it?"—Is that what you're saying?" L smiled,

"You--- FUCK!!" Light exploded,

L gave a small chuckle, "I was kidding, Light-kun. You said Death Note was a show. I'm smart enough to know that understandable sentence." Light sighed--- L was joking. That's a small surprise for him. Well, it doesn't affect Light right now. "So you'll take out the handcuffs?"

"No."

"Ryuuzaki!!"

"Hey everyone! What's with all the noise?" Matsuda waved to them. Right beside him was Ryuk with a basket full of apples given by his fans.

"Ah, Matsuda-san." Light looked at Matsuda then rolled his eyes, "Ryuk…"

Ryuk swallowed a whole apple, "Nice to see you again too…" He chuckled while walking towards Light. "Where'd you get that basket?" Light asked while checking his watch. Matsuda raised his hand enthusiastically, "Oh!! I'll say what happened!" Light furrowed his eyebrows while L just popped a sugar cube at his mouth. "Right…"

"You see, I just got a break with Aizawa-san and we went to the bathroom. Then Ryuk saw me in there and asked where Light-kun is because he wanted apple. I volunteered to buy some for him so we walked out of the studio to get some apples." Light seemed to know what happened next. L, on the other hand, seemed interested. "We can't go outside the studio without permission." Matsuda nodded in agreement, "We didn't have bodyguards so the result is awful!! Fans surrounded us so we ran—with a basket full of apples that Ryuk got from a Light fan. Then, we saw Mello with his gang! You know what happened next??"

"Let me guess, Mello used his violent behavior but got treaded by Mello fan girls." Light said in a passive tone.

"Then the guards came to take care of the chaos in the gates but some of them passed the security and they are still here." L added,

Matsuda blinked as Ryuk chuckled, "C-Correct." He grinned, "As expected from the two geniuses!!! Awesome!"

"No it's not, damnit!!" Mello growled,

"Ah, Mello!" L smiled.

Mello looked horrible. His clothes were slightly ripped apart, he didn't have any chocolate bars, and his hair was a mess. He had slight bruises at his arms from being tackled by the rabid fan girls. Light shivered at the thought of rabid fan girls. They're worse than Misa—which is bad.

"You don't look too good." Light said while raising his eyebrow,

"Isn't it obvious??" Mello shot back,

"Now, Mello. I perfectly understand that you detest Kira but don't point your finger on Light that much. It is just a show." L said patting Mello's head, "You don't look so good."

"It's those annoying fan girls…" Mello glared at the floor,

'How come he didn't snapped at L but only to me?!!'

Damn, when he becomes god of the new world, L and his little successors will be on top of his list to execute.

"Mello, where's Near and Matt?" L blinked,

"Huh?--- Shit, I forgot about them. I think I saw them with their fans." Mello said,

Matsuda squinted his eyes; "Maybe that's them with that small brown cloud at their tail?" Everyone's attention headed towards the unknown dust that seems to be growing larger. Light seemed to be the first one to notice along with L and Mello, "Damn…" Light cursed under his breath. The image of the cloud grew clearer revealing a running Matt, who was, by the way playing with his Nintendo DS and Near, who was riding in a toy car he had just got. Both of their faces didn't seem to be scared but they were running rather fast.

"OH MY GOD, IT'S LIGHT-KUN!!!!" Screams were heard after one woman shouted that sentence,

"LOOK WHO'S BESIDE HIM!!!! IT'S L!!!! KYAA!!!!!" It was like a pack of wolves running towards them. Light couldn't feel his feet. His eyes were just directed to the huge crowd. This is just some. 'Damnit, move. Move your feet!' Light felt his whole body tense up as he saw their faces--- crap. They're rabid fan girls.

"Well, I guess we have to postpone the discussion. We'll do it somewhere at lunch tomorrow." L said,

It seemed that L's words were the magic spell to make Light move. It was a good thing he's athletic or else he'll be dead—and the cause of death won't be from Kira, that's for sure. Ryuk followed Light's shoulder by flying, "Ne, Light?? I finished all the apples. Get me another one!"

Light gave a glare, "Can't you see I'm busy trying to save my own life?? Just wait until this whole thing is finished.."

Matsuda gave a silly grin, "Actually, I have some apples in my bag! I have ten of them!!"

Light watched Matsuda throw some apples at the shinigami's mouth. No way!!--- How could Matsuda have all those apples inside his bag? Why would he even have apples in his bag? No time to analyze the stupid situation at his right but to focus on guarding his life. He can't rule the world when he's a ghost!

Meanwhile, Matt ran towards Mello and dragged Near with him. "You're late, Matt!!" Mello accused,

"I have extra weight. You try to drag him and his cart." Matt gave the handle to Mello. Near looked at Mello, who nearly stumbled. Near glared, "I am not that heavy."

Mello growled, "Arrgh, forget it!! I'll carry you!! The wagon's annoying!"

"It's the RB-X423 vehicle."

"Whatever, a toy car!!"

Near felt arms lift his body then the next thing he knew, he was at Mello's shoulder like a sack of rice. Matt seemed amused for a while. "Hn, I didn't know you could do that to someone you despise." Matt said as Mello gave an angry look. "Look this is only for now!" Matt just stared.

Mello's vein throbbed, "Would you quit it?? I'm having a bad day and you're giving me more trouble!"

"You've always been the cause of trouble." Near pointed out,

"Just shut up!" Mello retorted. Meanwhile, Light's speed tried to go higher than his usual rate. This is a matter of life and death!---- No. Kira knows no such words as "running away"!! He looked back at the crowd with a fierce glare. Like Light said before:

'You can't ever win if you're always on the defensive. To win, you have to attack!'

He felt a hand grip his shoulder tightly. Light's eyes automatically stared at the person. "Are you crazy?? You're going to get killed by fans!!--- And the killing's supposed to be my job!" Mello rolled his eyes and pushed Light's body towards L. "Here, you take him." Light felt L's grasp at his wrist while they dashed.

"Light-kun." L started, "I know that this is pure nonsense that we are running away from fans and that we can outsmart them but we should just get as far as we could so we can formulate a plan that can take them out quickly. Oh, and your chances of being Kira is 59 percent now." Light felt that he would create those animated falls that are from graphic novels like that anime, Bleach but it seemed so stupid to do it while running. "I thought you already know I'm Kira??"

"Would you like me to increase it so that you can have your awaiting death penalty?"

"Damnit, let's just run!"

"As you wish, Light-kun."

12 minutes later:

Matt's head popped out from a corner looking for signs of life. So far, there was no sign of the rabid fan girls. He looked at Mello, "No one's here." Mello looked up, "Good!" He felt some weight at his left shoulder and stared at it. It was a white lump of a breathing thing. The thing looked at him and Mello's memory flashed in a second. "Shit!" Near seemed to be thrown to the ground but he successfully– and not to mention gracefully—landed.

"Right, we don't have much time. We'll have to create a plan in less than thirty minutes." L estimated. His eyes turned serious. Everyone seemed to agree except for Mello.

"But L--! We'll be working with Kira. He's a murderer…" Mello pointed at Light.

Light's vein pounded, "New god not murderer."

"We need to focus on our situation right now and Yagami later. We either run forever or prepare a perfectly successful plan that can get rid of those fans for a while." Near said while digging his hand to his pocket. He took out pieces of dice and started building a tower. "Right now, our lives are at stake."

"Hm, I'll agree on that for now…" Mello said. His attention went towards L, "We need to make this as soon as possible."

'They sound like they're going to get killed by Kira and they need to get out of the situation…' Light thought,

Matsuda's face looked straight at the floor. He's probably the only person in the group who's not intellectual. Light could feel an aura of sorrow in his side. He felt like sweatdropping at the sight of seeing Matsuda with his stream of tears. "Ryuk-kun." L called,

"Ha?" Ryuk looked up from his basket, "What??"

"You can go outside and see if someone might be there or maybe watching." L requested,

"I'm not in your side or the fan girls if you want to know." Ryuk's grin seemed menacing. L only blinked. Near looked up from his stack of dices and joined in the conversation, "We can get you a truck load of apples in exchange." Ryuk's ear twitched, "How come Light doesn't give me that?" Light only gave a defiant stare. "A-Ah, I'll go now…" And with that, Ryuk went through the wall. Mello took one of his spare chocolate. He began to think and so did L and Near.

Light rested his chin at his hand while watching at them. They have brilliant minds, Kira admitted. Maybe he should help too. He knew all of them have different ways of thinking just like how they try to catch Kira. The thing to do is to gather up all their plans and try to form it into one good plan. Muffled noises were heard outside. No way, it's just been three seconds after Ryuk left and the fans are already here? L looked up, "I'm guessing everyone already has a plan but--" He was cut off by the sounds of deathly breathing at his back.

"L!!!!!" A roundhouse kick was used to knock the huge rabid fan girl to the ground. "There's no other exit…"

"Fuck, then let's just make one!" Mello suggested,

Matsuda's spine was about to break--- did he have explosive under his clothes?!!!

"Let's go here…" Near pointed at an air vent.

"We better fit in there…" Light said.

Matsuda felt useless as he bowed down his head. His deduction of Mello blowing up the wall with a bomb is wrong. He went down to his knees with the others as they crawled through the air vent quietly. Mello gave an angry look to Mello, "Quit smoking, it's hard to breathe in this narrow area!" Mello grabbed the cigarette from Mello's mouth and grinded it into pieces. Matt was about to talk but got hit by Near's back. "Why did you stop?" Light looked in confusion,

"…" It took a few moments to hear Near's answer. "… We're lost."

If Near had a camera, he would have gotten a great picture. Their faces were priceless--- well, Matsuda's, Light's and Mello's that is while L's eyes just widened. Light's mind started to mechanically work to understand those words. He's trapped at the middle of an air ventilation with these people! Suddenly, almost everyone seemed to be moving continuously making the air vent move. "Wait, everyone. Don't move—the air vent will collapse due to our weight…" L's voice trailed off.

His words came true—Light felt his body dropped down, feeling the hard ground floor that awaited him.

"Light-kun!! Are you okay??!" Matsuda shouted down from the air vent. That was a bad move.

"H-Huh? Matsuda-san?"

He opened his eyes, only seeing what he feared. The fan girls seemed quiet for a while then followed by powerful screams that can cause anyone to have a disorder. Light felt uneasy from all their stares. Damn, if only he had the death note and Misa's shinigami eyes! He stared up at the five people who were stsill in the air vent. They could at least help!! Mello pointed forward as they left. Matsuda hesitated for a while then got dragged by Matt. L was the only one left watching.

"L, aren't you coming…?" Near said,

"Yeah, they'll soon find out about us if they look up--- L!!" Mello shouted as he saw L jumped down the air vent.

L waved to them as a signal to go ahead. It took a few seconds but soon they left the two geniuses alone with the fans.

"Ryuuzaki?" Light's voice was in pure disbelief.

"I can't have my first ever friend die in front of me…" L said crouching down to level his position with Light.

Light stared at L for a while. He thought that L made those previous words up to test Light if he was Kira. Maybe he misjudged the insomniac. L gave a smile to Light—an innocent one. Light didn't have a smile like that ever since the Death Note came to him. They would have been friends if it weren't for the Kira case. "Besides Light-kun, I will be the one to give you the death penalty if you are Kira." L's smile grew wider. Light gave an angry look, "What do you mean by that?!"

Light's vein throbbed horribly from all of that anger. He's thinking too much that he absolutely forgot who he was talking about.

"KYAA!!! LIGHT-KUN'S SO CUTE!!"

"L, YOU ARE SO HOT!!!"

This caused the two to visibly flinch from the loud noises. Light looked at L, "What do we do?" L stared back, "My plan is not perfectly full-proof so I suggest we attack." L disappeared from Light's vision and automatically appeared in front of a girl. He kicked her stomach causing her to fall while uttering her last words, "Oh my god!!—L kicked… me…" She fainted at the floor while L scratched his head. "I apologize, I'll call Watari to bring you to a near hospital."

L stared at Light, "What's the matter, Light-kun??" L paused to dodge a girl's embrace. "You don't hit girls?"

"Unlike me I do not have that much money to cover up the hospital fees." Light glared,

"Then what do you did you do to your monthly payment…" L's voice trailed off. Light had used it to buy that new PDA.

"LIGHT!!!"

An incoming rabid fan started running towards Light. He felt his life flash before his eyes… 'So this is how it feels like in those ridiculous cartoons. Hn.'

Before he closed his eyes, he heard a sound of explosion from his right, only to see two angry Kira-followers and one shinigami.

"What an entrance." Rem muttered,

"Another set of people comes to join the party." L said while chewing his thumbnail,

"I always wondered what would happen if they meet." Light said as he felt a bead of sweat fall down at his forehead, 'Those two are really strange.'

"I'll write you down at my death note!!"Misa pointed her finger at the woman with accusation while Mikami nodded in agreement, " So don't touch my Light-kun!!!"

Piku.

Mikami's head slowly turned to Misa with a vein throbbing, "That's my line…"

Light looked up to see a full view of Mikami. Is he gay?!

"That's a surprise, isn't it?" L said, who sat down yet again with Light,

"What?" Light blinked,

"That Yagami-kun's a homosexual and he's having a secret relationship with Mikami Teru-san. Iit's rather strange for me not to notice." L said as he looked up at the ceiling,

Light wanted to strangle him so badly.

Rem pointed at the mad crowd, "Misa."

Misa blinked, "Oh, yeah. We should stop quarreling for a while and take them down first!"

Mikami straightened his tie while he nodded once, "Yes, I suppose we should. No one gets near him…"

Light felt uneasy, 'This is really getting weird.'

"There's no need. We'll handle it from here." Light looked at his back to see a group of bodyguards and a laughing Ryuk beside them. A voice from the crowd of fans shrieked, "Retreat team!!" after watching the retreating crowd run out while the guards follow them, Ryuk went back to Light's side.

"Ryuk, I was wondering where you have gone to." Light stood up, now that he could feel his legs. "What have you been doing?"

"I sent him to go and get the bodyguards." L said, returning his sloppy standing position.

"You mean this is part of the plan?" Light's eyes widen, "Then where are Mello, Matsuda-san and the others?"

"Probably still in the ventilation."

Somewhere up at the ceiling:

Matsuda sneezed loudly as he wiped his nose with his sleeve. "Someone's talking about me."

"You seriously believe in that stuff? Those are only invented by stupid people for them to make others believe it." Mello said then glared at Matt, "Stop playing with that thing, dammit!!" Matt just looked up, "I'm trying to kill L." Mello dropped his chocolate, "The fuck--?!! Why are you even playing that thing?! Are you in Kira's side now?"

"It's only a game. I already finished the part with L."

"But still!!"

"You should go there!" Matsuda pointed to the screen,

"Hmm, I should try to get close to L so I can get his name." Matt's eyes narrowed as the words "TOTAL CONCENTRATION" suddenly popped out at his background,

"Matt--!!!"

"You should keep quiet, Mello. I am trying to find a way to get out of this air vent instead of breaking something the wall to make a hole." Near said while twirling his hair,

"You shut up!!"

L sipped his cup of tea while looking at his script, "We should rehearse, Light-kun… Light-kun?" L blinked after looking at Light's troubled face,

"Right… Rehearse." Light smiled as he looked back at his script. 'I thought I heard Mello screaming.'

Could they still be in there? Light sighed. This is really ridiculous.

End

Uh, I just did this 'cause I was bored. I'm not sure if I'll make a chapter two! Sorry if there are, uh, grammatical errors. I was typing it fast! (Laughs)