UNEXPECTEDLY PERFECT BAIT

Characters:

ACP Pradyuman, DCP Chitrole, Abhijeet, Daya, Rajat, Sachin, Nikhil, Vineet, Freddy, Pankaj, Dr. Salunkhe, Tarika, Shreya, Purvi, Kajal and…. Tanishka from TMD.

The Story:

It was just another day at the bureau. But since no case had been reported, Daya was getting bored. File work always bored him. He thought of chatting a bit with his buddy, but his workaholic friend was busy romancing with his files. Daya sighed, as the atmosphere was hot and the AC was not working causing them to use the fan, which was irritating him more. But suddenly an evil idea popped in his mind. He smirked looking at Abhijeet.

Daya: "Yaar Abhi, kitni garmi hai aaj. Yeh kambakht AC ko bhi aaj hi band padna tha."

Abhijeet: (not looking up from his file) "Daya…. tum chahe jo bahana bana lo, mai aaj tumhari ek nahi sunane wala. Tumhari files tumhe khud hi complete karni hogi. Aaj mujhe bohot kaam hai."

Everyone present in the bureau giggled.

Daya: (irritatedly) "Yaar, kamaal karte ho tum bhi! Mai yaha garmi ki baat kar raha hu aur tum files ki. Khair…. bhai mai toh chala juice peena. Tum me se koi peena chahega?"

Pankaj: (excitedly) "Sir, ek kaam karte hai. Aap aur mai niche se juice lekar aate hai sab ke liye aur ek saath pite hai. Sab ko thoda break bhi mil jayega aur garmi se chhutkara bhi."

Rajat: (naughtily) "Are waah, Pankaj! Kabhi kabhi kaafi samajhdari wali baate kar lete ho tum bhi."

Everyone laughed at it.

Daya: "Chalo Pankaj, jaldi se juice leke aate hai. Warna tumhare Abhijeet sir kahi Raavan se shikayat na kar de ki hum yaha sirf time pass karte hai."

Abhijeet: (angrily) "Dayaaa…"

But Daya had already rushed out of the door. Others laughed at his antics. Abhijeet too smiled after sometime. Pankaj and Daya reached the canteen. Pankaj ordered the juices while Daya excused himself and went out. He returned to find Pankaj holding one tray of juices and Raju holding another and both were coming out. He took the tray from Raju's hands and sent him back. He removed a packet from his pocket and mixed its contents into one of the glass.

Pankaj: "Sir, yeh aap kya mila rahe hai?"

Daya: (smiling evilly) "Bhaang."

Pankaj: (shouting) "Kyaaa?"

Daya: (giving him an angry look) "Pankaj dheere… Bureau me jaakar apne muh par tala lagake rakhna. Yeh glass mai apne haatho se Abhijeet ko dunga. Aaj toh bada mazaa aane wala hai. Hahahaha….."

Pankaj was looking at him worriedly. Daya shot him a look and told him to keep his mouth shut. Both went upstairs. They entered to find Tanishka present there.

Tanishka: "Hi Chachu."

Daya: "Hi Sweety! Papa se milne?"

Tanishka: "Of course. Juice laye aap? Sab ke liye?"

Daya: "Haa, par ek glass kum hai. Mujhe nahi pata tha na ki tum aa rahi ho, warna tumhare liye bhi lata."

Tanishka: "Koi nahi. Aap dedo sab ko juice."

Daya: "Haa, haa. Abhi de deta hu."

Daya kept the juice glass of Abhijeet on his table. He had purposely removed the labels of all other glasses except Abhijeet's so that he may not get confused. He turned to go when –

Abhijeet: "Are Daya, ek minute. Tanishka, juice tum de do sabko. Daya, tum mere saath record room chalo. Mujhe ek file chahiye thi. Par mil nahi rahi. Last time tumne li thi toh tumhe pata hoga ki woh kaha hai. Batao jara. Tanishka, tum Daya ka juice bhi yahi rakh do."

Tanishka nodded and kept another glass on the table and went to distribute the other glasses. Daya and Abhijeet sorted out the file and came out. Daya instantly picked up the juice glass and checked whether it had the label or not. No, it hadn't. He took it and was moving towards his desk, when suddenly the bureau door opened and ACP sir, Dr. Salunkhe, Tarika and DCP sir entered. ACP sir was looking damn irritated at something, while DCP sir seemed to be in a jolly mood today.

DCP: "Good morning, everyone!"

All: (in confused tone) "Good morning, sir."

DCP: "Juice party ho rahi hai yaha?"

Abhijeet: "Nahi sir, woh AC kharaab hai toh jara garmi lag rahi thi, toh hum logon ne socha ke juice pee lenge to achha lagega."

DCP: (forwarding his hand to Abhijeet) "Toh mai aur ACP toh bahar se aaye hai. Hume juice nahi pilaoge?"

Abhijeet: "Are sir, mera juice jhoota hai. Daya, tum apna juice de do na sir ko, please?"

Daya: (who was first scared but then was relieved, so happily) "Jarur sir, yeh lijiye."

Daya gave his juice to DCP sir. He took one sip and felt something. Then he drank the entire glass in one go. Things started revolving around him. He shook his head once.

DCP: (in a bit lost tone) "Sab 5 minute ke ander mujhe conference room me chahiye. Tanishka, tum bhi andar aa jana."

He went into the conference room shaking his head.

ACP: "Inhe kya ho gaya? Yeh aise kyu gaye andar?"

Dr. Salunkhe: "Unhe chhodo tum, apni sunao. Itne ukhade huye kyu ho?"

ACP: (in irritated tone) "Kuch nahi. Jaante ho unhone conference room me kyu bulaya hai? Apni veer – gatha sunane. Chalo, andar."

Everyone finished their juices and went inside. Daya and Pankaj was constantly looking at Abhijeet to see if the bhaang was working. But he seemed quite normal.

Pankaj: (murmuring to Daya) "Sir, bechari bhaang bhi Abhijeet sir se dar rahi hai. Dekhiye na, koi asar hi nahi hai."

Daya: (hissing) "Ssshh.. Pankaj, Tanu saamne hi hai humare. Sun liya toh gadbad ho jayegi."

All occupied their seats in the room. DCP sir was standing with his back towards them.

ACP: "Haa, sir. Shuru kijiye. Sab aa gaye."

DCP: (in cute, childish way) "Nai, mujhe shalam aa lahi hai."

Dr. Salunkhe who was drinking water spit it abruptly on the table in front of him. Everyone was completely shocked at DCP sir's behaviour and tone. He turned and everyone started blowing their noses to control their laughter. He was shyly looking at everyone and was…. BLUSHING.

ACP: (controlling his laugh somehow) "Sir… ahem… aap thik toh hai na, sir?"

DCP: "Pradyuman, tum na sach me bade unromantic type ke aadmi ho. (ACP sir was appalled and fumed at his statement. DCP sir added dreamily) Tum jaise log kya jaane pyaar kya hota hai. Dosto, aaj mai…. mai aaj… aaj mai tumlogon ko… apne….. apne pyaar ki mitthi dastan sunane wala hu."

Everyone was having a hard time controlling their laughter. DCP sir was continuously blabbering his love story.

DCP: "Is kahani me pyaar hai, romance hai, drama hai, dard hai. Romeo – Juliet, Laila – Majnu, Heer – Ranjha in sab ki love story se bhi jyada popular hogi…. Shamsher Chitrole aur Sunaina ki love story (Remember Sunaina from CID Episode "DCP Chitrole ki shaadi")"

Suddenly he stood up on the chair present there and took the bottle from Rajat's hand. He drank water from it and started swaying.

DCP: "Gaaonwalo, tumhe pata hai mai aur meri Su… hum dono ek dusre se kitna pyaar karte the… itna pyaar karte the, itna pyaar karte the… ki… ki mai bata nahi sakta kitna pyaar karte the… Us Su ke saath meri shaadi hone wali thi. Shaadi ke cards bhi bat chuke the. Par…. par yeh buddha ACP…. ise mera pyaar raas nahi aaya. Laga diya apne in Daya aur Abhijeet ko meri Su ke pichhe…. Kaha ke woh gunehgaar hai…. (making a cry baby face) Meri Su…. meri pyaari Su…. meri bholi Su…. Use gunehgaar thehrane chale the yeh log. Maine kitni koshish ki…. kitna samjhaya inhe…. par yeh pyaar ke dushman…. inhone meri ek nahi suni…. (cryingly) Chhin liya mujhse meri Su ko….. Chhin liya…. ahaa…. aha..aha..ahaa…."

He sat down and started crying loudly. Almost everyone was rolling on the floor with laughter while ACP sir was just starring at DCP sir with wide eyes and open mouth. After sometime –

ACP: (shouting in loud voice) "Chhuuuuppp…."

Everyone stopped laughing but couldn't help blowing their noses. They stood up at their places. DCP sir too stopped crying.

DCP: "Dekho… dekho kaise abhi bhi yeh Raavan mujhe aankhe dikha raha hai…"

This earned him another blast of laughter from the team. ACP sir shot an angry glance towards everyone which made them shut their mouths.

ACP: (in chewing tone) "Juice kaun leke aaya tha?"

Abhijeet: (instantly and innocently) "Sir, Daya aur Pankaj gaye the juice lane. Idea bhi unhi ka tha."

Daya shot a pleading glance towards his buddy.

ACP: (in angry tone) "Daya, kya milaya tha juice me? (Daya tried to say something when ACP sir raised his hand to stop him) Mujhe sirf sach sunna hai. Koi bahane baazi nahi chalegi."

Daya: (in low tone) "Bhaang milayi thi, sir. Thodi si…"

ACP: (patting his forehead) "Daya…. Shaadi ho chuki hai tumhari. Ek 8 saal ka beta hai tumhe. Kab sudhroge tum? Kab jayega tumhara yeh bachpana?"

Abhijeet: (jumping in between) "Jaane dijiye na sir, baccha hai. Ho gayi galti. Maaf kar dijiye na. Waise bhi sirf thodisi bhaang hi thi na. Thik ho jayenge DCP sir, don't worry."

ACP: (dramatically) "Haa, haa. Mai bhi sochu ki Abhijeet babu chup kaise hai? Apni dost ki rakshaa karne maidaan me kaise nahi utare? Hunh…"

He grabbed DCP sir who had again started crying profusely and dragged him out of the room and bureau. As soon as they left, everyone again broke out into laughter. After some time, they calmed down and came out of the room.

Purvi: (suddenly striken) "Are Daya sir, ek baat samajh me nahi aayi. Aapne apne hi juice me bhaang kyu milayi thi?"

Daya: "Are nahi, maine toh Abhijeet ke juice me – "

He stopped abruptly. Means the glass which he was having contained bhaang. But when did the glass get exchanged? He himself had separated Abhijeet's out. He looked towards Abhijeet and found the father – daughter duo wearing naughty smiles and winking towards Daya. All others saw that and felt amazed at the Sharp Shine and his daughter's intelligence.

Pankaj: (amused) "Par sir, aapko pata kaise chala?"

Tanishka: "Maine aap dono ko canteen ke bahar woh karnaama karte dekh liya tha. Maine upar aakar papa ko sab bata diya."

Abhijeet: (continuing) "Aur phir jab mai tumhe andar record room me le gaya, tab Tanishka ne glass ka label exchange kar diya. Par phir DCP sahab aa gaye. Aur maine socha kyu na target change kar le. Aur tumhara bhaang wala glass unke paas chala gaya."

All others: (bowing in front of him) "Jahapanaah, tussi great ho."

And broke out again into laughter imagining what a hard time ACP sir must be having handling DCP sir who had turned into UNEXPECTEDLY PERFECT BAIT.

Hope you guys find it humorous. Just a random thought. Please R and R.

Thankyou!