When I was younger, my father always told me stories about he and my mother and when they fell in love. He would reminisce on memories of her every chance he got and it excited me for the future. He would talk about their first date and suddenly it didn't seem like she was gone anymore. He would speak of her as if she were still here just to keep her alive to him somehow. Sometimes I could see the pain in his eyes when he would look at me because the older I got, the more I looked like her.
He'd be lying if he said everything between them was perfect, but after she died, he forgot all of the bad things. The good always outweighed the arguments and sleepless nights. At some point, he stopped being bitter and decided to be happy instead. Growing up, I couldn't wait to have a love like theirs filled with laughs, children, and an unbreakable love that shook me to the core despite little things such as said arguments and sleepless nights. He never found anyone else to take her place, but maybe that's what eternal love does to someone. Maybe that's what it did to me.
Edward Morgan Blake was nothing if not revolting. He managed to make an enemy out of everyone he'd ever met, but at least he was consistent. He had landed more women than anyone else I'd ever known, and he wasn't afraid to let everyone know it. He was cocky, reckless, and if you rubbed him the wrong way, you were apt to leave the premises in a body bag. He had a way of inflicting fear on even the bravest of people.
Despite all of that, Eddie was also endearing when he wanted to be, contrary to what you might want to believe. He was charming and witty and everything a girl shouldn't fall for, but it was never a choice. You didn't choose to love a man who was despised by most of the world. You didn't choose to love a man who had you wrapped around his finger and used it to his advantage. You don't choose to love people, it just happens. It wasn't an option, it was a feeling deep in the pit of my stomach that I couldn't shake, but maybe I never truly wanted to.
The thing about Eddie was that he made life exciting. When I was with him, I lived life on the edge and the adrenaline alone was what kept me alive. When my daily routine began to bore me, when my schedule was the same everyday, when I knew exactly what I was going to do from the time I woke up to the time I fell asleep at night, Eddie popped into my life and gave me a run for my money. He showed me a side of life that I didn't even know existed.
I'd be lying if I said Eddie was the man my father would be proud of me loving. I'd be lying if I said Eddie was compassionate and sensitive. I'd be lying if I said he never lost his temper. But I would also be lying if I said he didn't care about me, and for him, caring about someone took so much. He lived a life that nobody else could duplicate. He was brave, he was adventurous, and he cared about justice. Eddie saw the world in color while we all saw it in black in white. He saw everything for what it really was when we were too scared to. Eddie never sugar coated anything. What you saw was what you got. Now tell me, is that so bad?
We had bad days, we had really bad days, but we also had some great days that I wouldn't change for the world. When you're young and dumb, anyone you fall for feels like your forever, and I thought Eddie was mine. Hell, he might've been, but I'll never know now.
If you're looking for a love story, this isn't it. If you're looking for a happy ending, look elsewhere. And if you're looking for a comedy, well you're too late.
The Comedian is dead.