A/N: Normal disclaimers apply: I don't own the characters or show. Just borrowing to help feed the plot bunnies in my head. This is a quick one-shot because it wanted to be written. All mistakes are mine because I'm trash at editing and wanted to post it before I chickened out.
I hope you enjoy.
"Where is she?" Liz begged Dembe as he led her down the long hallway.
"She is safe with Raymond...here." He replied grasping the door handle and opening it for her.
The door opened slowly, revealing a small darkened bedroom. The only source of light was a small candle on the end table sitting beside a currently occupied rocking chair. The sight before her hitting her in the chest harder than a bullet.
"I will be out here." Dembe replied, closing the door behind her as she took cautious steps forward, attempting not to disturb the image before her.
There slept Raymond Reddington, peacefully sleeping with her daughter cuddled on his shoulder - her tiny fingers wrapped around the little wisps of chest hair visible at the v of his t-shirt. Her tiny frame covered with a crocheted blanket Liz had never seen before and his long legs resting on the ottoman.
She couldn't move. Tears burned her eyes as she watched the scene playing out- it was everything she'd ever wanted in her life captured in a single moment. Liz was so engrossed in her own thoughts that she startled when Red's deep voice broke the silence.
"I begged you, pleaded with you not to go." He spoke softly, so as not to wake her daughter but the pain in his voice was unmistakeable, "I mourned you...Nearly died at the thought of living without you."
"You were gone." He didn't open his eyes but she felt his words burning into her, "The only thing that saved me- gave me purpose- was this little girl."
She moved to sit at the edge of the bed beside him, there was nothing she could say. She'd done this to him. She had purposely put him through this hell and knew what it would do to him.
"The only other driving force besides protecting her was to find those responsible and destroy them - for what they did to you… To her!" This time he did open his eyes, his powerful gaze settling directly on her.
"Stop!" She hissed, trying to keep her voice low, "I did it for her."
"You took her from me!" He hissed, then sucked in a deep breath as he gently removed his chest hair from Agnes clenched fingers as she shifted in her sleep, effectively yanking at the small hairs.
Liz couldn't hold his gaze anymore, the weight of her actions and his trauma at what she'd done was more than she could bear. "We were going to get away- away from you! To protect her. Her life is in danger because you are part of her life."
Red's hand absently rubbed Agnes back as he started rocking her again, "I was the only thing keeping her and you safe."
"Tom-" she started to protest.
"Tom what?"
"He would protect us."
Red just glared at her, "Until you told him the truth…"
Liz sat stunned, she had no reply. She knew exactly what he was talking about, the lie; Her lie.
"Until you told him about us- our night together and the true timeline of your pregnancy." Red turned his head brushed his lips across Agnes forehead, "Will he figure out what I realized all those months ago?"
"It..it was a mistake."
"Is that going to be your excuse?" Red asked incredulously. "Turning the narrative to 'bastard taking advantage of the damsel' in her time of distress?"
Liz stuttered, "I… I needed comfort and human contact- we'd been through so much."
"So did I but I'll never call it a mistake," he growled, "her name is Agnes and she's proof that for a least one night you didn't deny what I mean to you."
The silence hung heavy in the air between them.
After a long moment Red continued "You came to my bed."
"You didn't turn me away." Liz spat back, struggling to keep her voice down.
"Why-" Red stopped as the influx in his voice jolted Agnes slightly, causing her to squirm a bit before being hushed back to restful sleep as Red rocked the chair gently again. "Why would I turn you away? I'm a man, not a saint. I've never denied myself anything that I've ever wanted."
Liz struggled to turn the entire event back on him, with very little luck. "I had just killed someone in cold blood- my faculties weren't exactly fully functional."
"Oh come on." Red snorted, "I didn't seduce you. I didn't beg you. I saved your life- I didn't see you jumping Ressler during his fleeting moments of heroics or sweet Aram when he saved you from the Director."
Liz just starred teary eyed at him- the clenching in her stomach making her feel sick. She didn't have anything to fight back with- he was right and they both knew it.
"You're a grown woman capable of making decisions- you just can't handle the consequences because then you have to admit that which you've been trying to hide for so long." Red turned away from her as silent tears slipped down her cheeks.
Liz knew what was coming. It was a horrible truth- something she didn't want to give a name to, let alone speak aloud.
"You love me." His gruff voice was heavy with emotion but he refused to look at her. "You did exactly what you wanted because for once, there was no one there to shake their head or wag their finger at you. YOU made a choice about what YOU wanted."
Liz couldn't hear anymore tonight- she had to change the narrative, "Her life is in danger because of you. She's only weeks old and look what her life has been! Tom and I can give her a wonderful life away from this- a normal life! You will never be able to give her me or her that."
Red couldn't fight his fury anymore at the mention of Tom's name, "She is MY DAUGHTER! I would sacrifice everything to protect the both of you!"
Liz's retort slid off her tongue before she had a chance to think, "Like you protected Jennifer and Naomi!"
Red reared back like he's been slapped. The shock on Liz's face at her own statement was proof she hadn't meant to say it. "Red I-"
"Get out." Was the only words he could find. They sounded painful in his throat and he found himself rocking Agnes once again- gently rubbing her back to take his mind off the hurt and betrayal of her words.
Liz stood slowly, still shocked by her own harsh words. After a long pause she moved silently towards Red, reaching out for Agnes.
Red's hand grabbed Liz's, stopping her movement with only light pressure. "She is fine where she is- I've already fed and changed her for bed."
She didn't try to push. As her hand began to retreat he released it immediately, returning back to its previous action.
The only sound in the room was the creak of the rocking chair and the sound of soft snoring coming from Agnes. It was deafening to Liz.
Not another word was spoken. Liz turned slowly towards the door to retreat to the solitude of her own room, pausing only briefly to take in the sight before her one last time.
I hope you've enjoyed this quick one-shot. It's the first I've written in over a year. As always leave love or hate- I appreciate all feedback.
Always,
Lady