My name is Imelda van Helisig and I am starting a school in a town called Forks Washington. I'm from Transylvania originally. My dad is the world's greatest vapmire hunter. His name is Achilles and he's killed so far exactly 997 vampires all over the world. We travel the world together searching for vampires hiding among poor and oblivious humans.
My dad got messages from his secret Hunting Society called The Society of Night about vampires distributing terrors in Washington in the USA.
He stepped into my bedroom and announced intensely, "It's time you practiced hunting vampires on your own."
I was in training to be a vampire hunter too. I said, "What must I do?"
"You must go undercover as a student in this school where vampires are allegedly doing terribly monstrous things. I plan to DESTROY them so that nothing remains but their black satanic ashes."
"Ok! I can't wait!" It was an excellent opportunity to finally prove that I could be just as deadily efficient as my dad. We got ready to travel to the USA. We left our comely Transylvanian mansion early in the morning. I said goodbye to my pet cats, Fluffy, Fifi, Winky, Foofy, and Shinji. I was going to miss them so much because they always slept with me at night and listened to me reading out loud the textbooks on vampire hunting techniqes.
Scene TWO:
Forks was an ugly place and it smelled like dead fish, like from the ocean. It was very different from our home, Transylvania, which was beautiful and mountainous with fresh forest air and there were chilly, ivy-covered mideval castles and fortresses and monsteries on narrow cliffsides. We'd cleaned the area of vampires years ago so now the peasants were all safe and they could hunt for warthogs in the forests happily. We were oreos in our native land. They called us the Vanquishers of Evil!
Anyway. We had to be undercover here so I had to try to be American as possibl and so I pulled on blue jeans and a shirt that said "Ambercrumby" and I put my long wavy black hair in a pony tale.
My dad and me moved into the incest room of a local hotel and my dad told me: "Imelda, tomorrow you are going to school. Be careful of the vampires. I have packed a pack for you. Here is holy weater in a Barbie thermos. I put it in a thermos as a disguise. You have to throw the water on the vampires and they will be seriously maimed. Here also is a wooden stake, a hammer, an amulet of protection, and a handful of silver crosses. Do you remember the magical encantation?"
Yes, I said. It's 'az ördög vigye el a gonosz lelkedet'. It's an ancient spell my dad taught me that would keep vampires away from you.
"Very good." My dad said. And then we went to bed.