Dangerous Waters

"What're you doing out here Kate."

"Just leave me alone."

"I came to find you." Kate was sitting on the sand, fully dressed, with a bottle of whiskey between her legs. In truth it was the only bottle she could find in Betty's room that actually had any liquid left in it.

"Yeah well… I didn't ask you too." Betty shrugged off the sadness that always comes from being talked to this way. Here Kate was, smoking the cigarettes that Betty had been looking for earlier. The ones she had wanted to bring out so that she could offer one to Teresa. Kate was obviously taking them freely. Two more butts sat beside her in the sand, smoked and discarded.

"There's my yellow jacket." Betty said. Kate looked down at herself. She was wearing Betty's jacket and adding insult to injury, she was also wearing her favorite pair of Betty's old pants. The ones that Betty would wear if she thought she'd be doing something messy like trying to fix something or running around town to look for someone, perhaps someone like Kate, right now. Kate knew that if Betty had a choice, she would be wearing her pants right now. If Betty had a choice, she would be smoking her cigarettes and drinking her whiskey. The jacket was a fluke. It was the last thing Kate thought Betty would miss; an afterthought.

"I was cold." Kate said, there was no remorse in her voice. She tucked the jacket a little further over her shoulders. It was shrouded over her like a cape. She had gotten dressed at the boarding house without thinking. Anger led her on. After her date with Ivan and hearing the laughter coming from Betty's room earlier, and seeing Teresa and Betty out just hours later, Kate was not feeling like having a conversation with anyone, let alone Betty of all people.

Feeling a bit of the hostility that was radiating off of Kate in what seemed like billowing clouds of disgust, Betty sat down gingerly hoping not to shake her.

"What are you doing with her?" Kate asked.

"What?"

"The bond agent. I heard you two earlier. I know she was in your room."

"A lot of people visit my room. What makes you think we were doing something." Betty felt uncomfortable. She had never really envisioned having this conversation. There was so little they actually talked about these days.

"I have my reasons." Kate said harshly. By now Betty knew that Kate had taken her clothes out of spite and possibly boredom but she couldn't help but find pleasure in Kate wearing them. There was a time when Betty imagined Kate in her clothes, but she always imagined that they would fit her to a tee. Their bodies were very different.

"I like your style." Betty said, changing the subject.

"Don't play cute with me McRae. I know what your game is. I thought we decided things together."

"Wa-What things?!" Betty asked, standing up. "You've decided everything for us Kate, E-VE-RY-THING!" Betty said, enunciating her syllables like she always did when she was angry. Kate stood up too. Instead of fighting, she turned from Betty and began to walk away from her to nowhere in particular. "I know this is what you want!" Betty yelled after her. Kate wiped a cold tear from her cheek. "You want me to be unhappy!" Betty was still trying to get to her, and it was working.

Kate turned angrily, the half empty bottle of liquor swinging carelessly in her right hand.

"I wanted for us to do things together! I wanted for us to stick to the plan!" Kate was swiftly approaching Betty. Betty hated to admit it but sometimes she was a little scared of Kate. Say now, for instance, Betty didn't know if perhaps Kate would smash that bottle of whiskey right ontp her head. A moment of rage could seize her, Betty could see herself being pushed off her feet in a moment of anger. Kate was as wild as Gladys, a trait she rarely saw in herself but often envied in others. Betty wished that she wasn't so controlled. Even after her latest bouts of anger with random strangers like Reggie and Kate's father, Betty still wished she could let herself get mad.

"I told you, Kate. I can't lie anymore, not to myself. Not to you." There was a long pause in which the two women seemed glued in their spots like statues. "We're safe now, Kate. There's no point in pretending to be someone else." The words stung. Kate backed away from her, holding her head. She began to walk away again but Betty grabbed at her left arm, trying to pull her back. "We HAVE to talk about this Kate. We NEED to talk." The desperation in Betty's voice was dire and Kate couldn't have it.

"I can't Betty…" Was all Kate could mutter, she pulled her arm away and took off walking down the shore as the sun began to set. Betty watched after her, her emotions like the waves. She wasn't going to look after her, not this way, not anymore. If it were two weeks ago she'd wait where she stood in hopes that maybe in time Kate would wander back and she could take her home. But right now, she couldn't do that. She had to let Kate live the life she wanted. She had to let herself lose her, for now, and maybe forever.

The light was disappearing quickly but Kate wasn't worried. She rarely thought of her own safety now. Nothing could hurt her as much as her father had and that was all over now. Kate drank from the bottle, dipping her bare feet in the cold water, not caring that she had left her shoes back with Betty, near the cigarette butts and the confusion.

What was so wrong about Betty finding a new friend? Kate was angry at herself for being so angry. She had Ivan now and Teresa could just be a friend. Perhaps she has it all wrong, perhaps Teresa really is just a friend, like Gladys. Kate's mind wandered off. Gladys…

She walked the coast until she ended up at Sandy Shores. She knew she'd end up there eventually. Marco had told a long story once about taking a girl out on a date and having to walk the whole length of the beach just to chase a crazy girl he barely knew. Kate laughed at the story now, now that it had some relevance to her. Perhaps she was Betty's crazy girl. She smirked at the thought but her smile quickly diminished once she realized where it had come from.

"No shoes." She said aloud. The raucous sounds from Sandy Shores could be heard long before she saw the sign. People were having fun in there and here she was, wallowing in her pain and drinking a full bottle of someone elses whiskey.

"You lost doll?"

"Not really." She smiled. "It's my shoes that are lost!" She called to the stranger. In the night haze he looked dashing among the shadows, a stunning form.

"Well that won't do!" The man called back. She smiled at him. Before she could get close enough to see his face he had run off somewhere and returned in almost seconds with a pair of men's shoes from God knows where.

"You didn't!" She almost screamed in her excitement.

"I know they're men's shoes, but they're all I could find on such short notice."

"My hero!" She smiled.

"Shall we go in?" The sailor asked. He was a sailor! Kate was so very excited. If not at the prospect of a dance, at the prospect of the temporary yet immediate happiness that a place like Sandy Shores could deliver.

"I would love that." She said, a smile taking over her.

PART 2

At home, Betty paced. It had been at least two hours and Kate still hadn't come back to the rooming house. An eagle couldn't do a better job keeping a lookout. Betty had shifted between walking the halls, pacing outside with the front of wanting to smoke in the cool air, and stressing in her room alone with her thoughts berating her.

"Get a grip McRae, she's a grown woman!" She was talking to herself through clenched teeth. Her body slumped down into her chair, she didn't know what to do now. It was so hard for her to let Kate make her own rules, mostly because she knew that Kate was a lot more innocent than her, a lot more trusting.

When the knock came at her door she felt foolish for acting so strangely all night. After having Teresa in her bed it seemed a waste to end the night in such a frenzy.

"Betty…" The voice called. Betty knew before her whole name was uttered that it wasn't Kate coming home.

"Gladys?" Betty said. She peeled open the door to find Gladys Witham hiccupping with sadness. She was crying.

"Oh … Oh Betts. He's gone." She uttered. Gladys fell into her arms and roared with sadness. Betty just held her in confusion. She thought for a moment that Gladys must be talking about James and then it all made perfect sense. James was off at war and the last letter she received was laced with terror.

"I'm sorry Gladys." Betty said, holding her friend in the doorway, not carrying about the girls in the rooming house butting in and asking questions. Despite it being late, the rooming house was still bustling with activity.

Far across town Kate was having the time of her life. Sandy Shores was so familiar that it hurt. The man who had found her, Ronnie, he was a true spirit.

"Not many girls can cut a rug like you!"

"Nice of you to say." Kate flirted. She was having such a swell time, she almost wanted to take him home with her but that just wouldn't do. He was very different from Ivan, he didn't coddle her, and she liked that. It was a different kind of honesty, one Kate very much prefered.

"Where are you staying?" She asked. "Will you be here long?"

"Staying close. Tomorrow's my last full day, honestly." Ronnie looked sad about it. Until tonight, his luck with the ladies had been nonexistent in Toronto. His friends all got girls on their very first night in town, so they'd been ignoring him while he wallowed away in unfamiliar territory all by his lonesome. For Ronnie, there was nothing worse than being alone. He had written so many letters in the past few days that he was starting to feel like a sap.

"You're not asking to come home with me, are you beautiful?" He asked, thinking that she was just making conversation. A good girl like Kate would never take him up on such an offer.

"Actually, that is what I'm asking." She stated. She stopped her dancing. She suddenly knew what could cheer her up and she wanted it straight away.

"You… you're not pulling my leg?"

"Can we?" She asked.

"Of course, red! Anything you want!" He shouted. He was so excited that it was infectious. The way to his room would be filled with small talk and laughter. They had both been drinking an obscene amount of liquor. If Ronnie could find his room at all it would be a miracle.

"Thanks for having me." Kate said, as Ronnie opened his door and held his arm out to let her in.

"Pleasure's mine." His room was so plain that Kate had a brief moment of panic.

"It's so empty." She gasped.

"Soldier's life." Ronnie took his hat off and unbuttoned his uniform to reveal his white undershirt. He was dashing. Much older than Ivan, she suddenly noticed.

"What do you want to do?" Kate asked, taking a gulp.

"Whatever you want's fine." He said, laying down on the bed. Surprising herself, Kate layed down right next to him. "Didn't take you for the bold type." Ronnie said.

"Let's just say, I've had one hell of a day." Sadness swept over her but she couldn't feel it all. Ronnie was inching ever closer to her face and her sadness disappeared in her excitement. He leaned in and kissed her and she pulled at his collar, pressing her body into is. She had completely forgotten that she wasn't wearing a dress but when Ronnie touched her waist she remembered instantly.

"Oh Ronnie…" She said, embarrassed. "You're such a gentleman, I completely forgot I was dressed like this. Dresses are all that I wear, you must believe me!" Kate said in a panic.

"You look great." He said. "How did you come to be wearing such a get up, anyway?!"

"I must look awful… Men's shoes, pants… a jacket like this… Truth is, I borrowed my friends clothes today and then well.. you know all about the shoes." Kate scolded herself instantly for accidentally implying that she would look awful in Betty's clothes. Betty never looked awful, it was always quite the opposite in her mind's eye.

"Doll, you couldn't look cuter in a dress if you tried." He was serious and she thought of herself saying the exact same words to Betty, and she smiled. He touched her waist and her mind fluttered back to him. When she was on the sand before he had been staring out at her, daydreaming about the kind of girl she must be. Her clothes were too loose and her hair was so beautiful. "When I saw you out there on the beach, I thought you were some kind of angel."

"No you didn't." Kate laughed. It was the most authentic laugh she had experienced in quite some time.

"I sure did." He smiled.

"You're sweet." Kate's heart hurt a little, thinking about how Ronnie would be out of the city by tomorrow. And about how adorable Betty always looked in her clothes, and about how it takes a stranger to get you to see things you've forgotten. "I just met you and I may never see you again." She said, out of the blue.

"Sad isn't it." He joked.

"It is." She said, pulling at his collar. Why was he so very sad, she wondered. "You're the nicest man I've met in a real long time. Most men around here aren't looking for a conversation."

"Would you write to me if I asked?"

"Maybe." Kate said, not knowing how she would feel in the morning when the booze wore off and her memory refreshed itself. She was in this man's arms because of the hurt that was caused by a woman. There was no telling how she'd feel by the light of day. "Can you just hold me?" She asked.

"That sounds like something I'd like, very much." Ronnie said, moving his arm under Kate's head and pulling her onto him so that he could lay on his back and perhaps fall asleep with her in his arms. Ronnie really wasn't looking for anything more than company. This night was ending in a wonderful way.

"I like this." Kate said.

"Me too." Ronnie breathed. Kate enjoyed the smell of him and his warm chest beneath hers. She wondered what would come of this wonderful man and hoped to God that he wouldn't be lost to the war

PART 3

Saturday morning was a shock to them all. Teresa rose alone in her room. She wondered if Betty would be interested in breakfast and then remembered that she had to be somewhere for work. Disappointment washed over her. Perhaps there would be time later in the day, she thought, but she knew realistically that the chances were slim.

Gladys and Betty both woke up at the sound of the door being opened. Kate had come home at last. Ronnie was already getting ready in a room across town, they were shelling out orders and he had to be present, so the morning flew by and Kate couldn't wait to be back home with Betty, she suddenly felt a strong urge to be near her and to feel the closeness that she knew would always be a part of her.

"Kate?" Gladys asked, her eyes filled with shadows. Kate walked over to the bed and sat at the end of it.

"Did you sleep together?" Kate asked.

"Yes. Well. I stayed the night, if that's what you mean." Betty avoided their looks. The sound of a match flaring up, filled the room. Betty lit her cigarette and took a long drag.

"Where were you?" Betty asked. "Not that it's any of my business."

"Of course it's our business." Gladys said righteously, scolding Betty for her nonchalant attitude. Of course they all cared about one another, that would always be the truth. Gladys got up and walked to Betty's mirror. Her face was streaked with the trails of her tears. She dipped her manicured fingers into the bowl of water on the vanity and splashed herself, using a discarded shirt of Betty's to wipe at her face.

"God, I look terrible." She muttered. Betty smirked, rising from the bed. As usual, Gladys was the perfect distraction from all that was going on with her and Kate.

"What do you expect?" Betty asked. She walked up behind Gladys and watched her face in the mirror. How it hung there drowsily, the expression of loss imprinted in so many ways. Kate watched confused as Betty tenderly pulled Gladys's hair back behind her shoulders and hugged her from behind. Through the mirror Betty and Gladys were sharing a look that was just about breaking Kate's heart.

Gladys turned around and hugged Betty properly, there would be no onesided hugs, not in this family of friends.

"Thanks Betts…" Gladys whispered, holding her close. "Don't know what I would've done last night if you hadn't of been home." Gladys was serious. Losing James was something she was sure would happen but she never expected it to happen so soon. All this time she had been trying to prepare herself. Her campaigns and distractions, her dates with Gene… It was all to distract herself from the sadness. The eventual sadness that was now hitting her like a ton of poorly-made bricks.

"We're in this together." Betty said, holding her tight. When Gladys opened her eyes she noticed Kate on the bed, just staring at her.

"I better go. My parent's must be worried." They were. Lorna had called them right after leaving the rooming house to let them in on the news. She had left Gladys after an hour or so of trying to console her. Assuring the Withams that their daughter was alright, was something that proved impossible. But Lorna knew that Gladys would no doubt want to be alone right now. If it were her, that's what she would want.

"Come back when you want. I'll be at the rooming house all day." Betty was expecting to be on Teresa watch anyway. But for Gladys she'd stay home, she'd make sure Teresa knew and she'd never leave, these were hard times. She thought to herself that Gladys shouldn't be alone right now.

"What's going on?" Kate asked.

"More than you'd like to know." Gladys said, taking Kate's face in her hands and staring deeply into her beautiful eyes. "I love you Kate." Gladys said. She took Kate into her arms and hugged her like she may never ever see her again. Kate hung in her arms like a frightened doll. She hated being in the dark. Betty and Gladys were always bonding and she was always on the outside, feeling helpless.

"See ya, love birds." Gladys called after them, shutting the door behind her. Kate jumped as it slammed.

The room was still and both women were afraid to move. Kate shot a look at Betty, she was angry and tired and sad and annoyed but she had come to see Betty, she had chosen to visit her friend.

"It's James." Betty said, she moved to the window and opened it so she could stare out of it. She wanted to be looking somewhere else, somewhere that Kate couldn't see. "He's gone."

"Gladys…" Kate whispered, her body falling down to sit on the bed.

The rest of the morning was wordless between them but Kate and Betty took to the common-room and putted around each other like the old friends that they were. Betty made tea and poured them both cups. Kate lit a cigarette, took a drag and then handed it to Betty. Women in the rooming house watched and walked around them. Their dance was effortless. They were like an old married couple. Words just weren't necessary.

The hours passed quickly. There was tea and cards, there was reading. Kate found crackers and made sandwiches. They were in mourning and it was what they both desperately needed, to be thinking about anything except for their own problems and how they affect one another in a way that was unexplainable.

Morning moved into afternoon and soon afternoon moved into night. The women at the rooming house were all coming and going but few disturbed them in the common room. Betty wanted to be there, for Gladys and for Teresa. And despite all her self loathing she did want to be there with Kate.

"Why are you being so nice to me." The tension had been building while Betty read a magazine. Kate was knitting and their eyes kept wandering up at one another. They kept exchanging soft smiles. Kate was elated by this day and the night that she had before. The whole weekend seemed a gift. Even traipsing around in Betty's clothing had felt therapeutic.

"When have I ever been mean to you?" Betty asked, pain spreading through her chest like a chain reaction. No words all morning and now this. "You haven't been thinking about that long, have you? Am I mean to you?"

"No…" Kate said, consternation taking over her face. "No… I didn't mean that.. I meant." She sat up in her chair. "I was mean to you… I'm sorry."

"No.. you're right. I was mean to you." Betty remembered. She looked so serious that Kate couldn't help but laugh.

"Now you're laughing?!" Betty remarked, standing up.

"You look so cute when you're angry, Betty.. I just.. I can't help it!" Betty paced, her eyes never leaving Kate.

"Should've left you when I had the chance." Betty joked, sitting back down with her magazine and exchanging another soft and gentle look between herself and Kate Andrews. The attraction was there and neither of them could turn it off, so for now they just accepted it. Kate smiled back at her.

"I'd like to see you try." Kate said, sweetly. She knew that Betty would never try to leave her. She'd have to be cast out. The thought comforted her greatly and she felt safe in it, if not a little guilty.

They heard noise from the other room. It was Teresa, she was looking for Betty. Betty looked to Kate in surprise but Kate retreated into herself, she wondered if she should go out looking for Ronnie. But she was rather curious about Betty's knew friend.

"Teresa! In here." Betty said, motioning for Teresa to join them. The room felt suddenly way too quiet to accommodate them. Instead of extending a hand or a word, Kate turned methodically away from Teresa and began to fiddle with the victrola. She thought that perhaps music would fix the problem.

"I hope you weren't waiting for me."

"We weren't." Kate said, coldly, returning to Betty's chair and picking up Betty's magazine. It would give her something to hide behind.

"No…" Betty said sadly. "I mean. I was hoping.."

"It's okay." Teresa smiled, laying a hand on Betty's shoulder. Kate's eyes darted away once Teresa noticed them.

"I'm not interrupting, am I." Kate shook her head. She didn't want to talk to Teresa. She didn't want to know Teresa.

"We had a good day." Betty smiled, looking over at Kate. Kate smiled back but she couldn't help but notice that hand that Betty had placed on Teresa's arm and she hated that she noticed.

"So are you two…" Kate mumbled, causing Betty's face to go red. Teresa looked to Betty and smirked.

"I don't know what to say." She said, honestly.

"What are you playing at, Kate?!" Betty was angry.

"Are you, a couple."

"Couple of what?!" Betty walked over to stand over Kate in a domineering sort of way that Kate very much enjoyed.

"Does she like you." Kate asked, laying the magazine on her lap and facing Betty in a way that was much too easy to achieve.

"I do." Teresa said, taking a seat at the table and drinking from a cup of tea that had been sitting for a little while.

"That's mine." Kate said, standing to push Betty away. "You just come into my house and start touching my things?!"

"I don't see why you're so angry." Teresa said, savoring the taste of the tea and smiling at Kate. Teresa knew she had the upper hand, she really hadn't done anything wrong. Her only crime was liking Betty and that surely felt natural to her.

"You don't see why I'm angry?!" Kate said, huffing. "That's my tea, that's my chair, this is my house, and you just busted in like you own the damn place! Who are you anyway, Rockefeller?!"

"KATE!" Betty yelled, her hands at her side in little balled up fists.

"Don't worry Betty, I've got a date anyway."

"With Ivan?" Betty asked, Kate had flown away from Teresa and back to her chair, her eyebrows relaxed into a more natural state at the mention of Buchinsky.

"No, Ronnie. I met him yesterday." Kate said, stealing Betty's magazine and snatching her tea-cup from Teresa's hands. She was out of the room before Betty could breath but then she turned the corner again just to make a point. "He's a sailor!" Kate gloated, raising her eyebrows as if to say, SO THERE!

Betty was suddenly furious but her anger was cut-off by Teresa's laughter.

"My my, she certainly is touchy!" Teresa laughed even more.

"Not the word I was thinking of." Betty said, sitting down.

"I like her," Teresa smiled, "Poor me some tea?" Teresa was wearing a dress and Betty loved to see her this way, she was actually very feminine, something that surprised Betty. "It's been a long day… A long day that didn't get interesting until about right now." She smiled softly.

"Sorry about her.." Betty said. She was sorry. It wasn't Teresa's fault that Betty invited her into her life of madness.

"Oh, don't be. I like it." Teresa said, patting a hand on Betty's leg playfully. Betty leaned over, to fill Teresa's cup.

"Yeah well… I don't." Betty said plainly, topping off her own cup to warm it up.

"She's trying to make you jealous. You know that right." Betty watched Teresa sip from her cup, her eyes so full and looking right at her. She felt flustered.

"What?!" Betty said. "No, it can't be. She's got her own life is all. She's proud of it." Betty stuck up for Kate.

"That's not why I'm here, is it?" Teresa asked lightly, setting her cup down on the table. "I mean, you didn't just want me to make Kate jealous. Did you?"

"No." Betty said, sadly. "Don't." She began. Teresa took hold of Betty's hands to try to calm her. The blonde was hiding her eyes now and she looked very sad.

"Hey. I was kidding." Teresa smiled. She pulled Betty's face up by the chin.

"Ha." Betty faked a laugh. "This is hard for me." Betty said. "You don't have to be part of it if you don't want to."

"I want to." Teresa said, reassuring her. "Dance with me?" The music that Kate had started was filling the room and the sun was setting causing the room to darken. Teresa took Betty in her arms and they danced. "You told me, you weren't looking for anything, remember." She whispered.

"Yes…" Betty said, sadly. The truth of the matter was that she was looking for something, but it was something that she knew she couldn't have.

"I know you're still in love with her Betty. I know it and that's alright. This isn't about making her jealous, I get that." She paused. Betty felt so good in her arms that she wanted for things to turn out in her favor. But she couldn't rush a sticky situation and if she had to deal with Kate to get to hold Betty, that would do for her. "You're trying to let go… and it's hard."

"How do you know so much?" Betty asked. She had been quiet in Teresa's arms and the smell of her was intoxicating. Betty's mind had wandered back to the night before last. Teresa had made her feel something so unimaginable. Betty had truly been happy that night. It made her realize how rarely she felt happy.

"I've been through a lot… Seen a lot of things."

"You make me happy…" Betty breathed sadly. She could feel the smile on Teresa's face. "No one does that." She finished.

From outside the door Kate had been hovering. She could barely make out the words but she knew what she had heard. Panic rushed over her and she ran to her room, knocking a painting off the wall and creating a loud banging noise. Betty stepped away from Teresa and they both stared at the door in knowing confusion.

Betty returned to Teresa's arms.

"Well… I guess if Kate heard that, you'll be hearing from her soon." Teresa joked playfully. She really wasn't angry about Kate. She had only just met Betty this week, expecting things to be easy and uncomplicated was just crazy.

"Don't make fun of this…" Betty said, nestling into her. "I don't want to lose you either." Betty sighed, a tear dropping from her eye.

They danced until the song ran out and then danced some more as night crept over the room. Before long it was completely dark and Gladys returned. The three women lit three candles in the dark and drank to James Dunn, crying quietly, falling asleep on top of each other in the common room, after singing for over an hour and weeping intermittently.

Kate came home late and made a place for herself beside them. When she woke, she was in Gladys's arms but she couldn't help staring at Betty. Betty woke in much the same way. Trapped beneath Teresa's arms, she stared at Kate in the silence and they both looked sad, like the distance was still too much for them to bare, but neither of them moved and neither of them looked away. At one point Betty extended her hand on the floor and Kate held it with her own and they nodded off together.