Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural or it's characters.
Warnings: Completely AU, Sam and Dean aren't related and are close in age, abuse, character death, original male character (Bryan), slight slash, sad, it's not a happy fic at all.
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Bryan walked into the apartment he shared with his roommate, Sam having just gotten back from his girlfriend's. He called out that he was back but got no response, he went into the living room and found Sam laying on the couch staring at a picture that was on the small glass coffee table in front of him. He had been doing that a lot lately so Bryan knew just what picture it was. It was a picture of a teenage Sam standing next to another slightly smaller teen. They were holding on to each other and smiling.
"Hey, Sam." Bryan said looking down at the man before him. Sam merely looked up and said "Hey" in a sad voice barley above a whisper. "What's wrong?" Bryan asked and "nothing" was Sam's reply. It didn't surprise Bryan at all though, Sam always said that when it was about the picture or the boy in the picture. He sighed, "You know you can tell me Sam. Whatever it is you can tell me." Bryan waited for a reply but Sam remained silent.
Sighing Bryan turned about to leave the room when Sam sat up and began slowly talking, his voice full of emotion. "His name was Dean." Sam said pointing to the other teen in the picture. "He was my best friend, only I liked him... a lot... as more than just a friend. I was always too afraid to tell him though, so afraid he wouldn't feel the same." Bryan walked to the couch and sat down next to Sam.
"His dad used to beat him a lot. I always tried to get him to get help but he was scared and I didn't know what to do. I mean we were only 16, we were just kids. I wanted to say something, to get him help but he begged me not to, he was afraid of what his dad might do. I honestly wasn't sure if anyone would believe me anyway, his dad was always real good at making sure Dean's bruises would be easily hidden or could be played off as an accident." Sam paused for a moment and took a deep breath.
"This picture" Sam began again picking up the photo he had been looking at moments before. He stared at it for a few seconds, his fingers running over the frame gently. "We used to sit in this field whenever we could." he said pointing to the field behind their heads. "It was beautiful and secluded. We'd go out there for hours just siting and talking or on the bad days I would hold him when it all just got to be too much." Sam sighed deeply unshed tears burning his eyes.
"You know he used to tell me he wanted to be a firefighter, he said he wanted to save people. To make a difference, even if it was just to one person." Sam smiled a small sad smile at the memory. "No matter what his problems were he was always more worried about other people." A single tear ran down Sam's cheek then as he gently moved his thumb over the picture where Dean stood.
"His dad got a little too mad one night after work and as usual he took it out on Dean, only this time he didn't stop. It was bad, Bryan, really bad." A few more tears escaped Sam's eyes. "He called me from his cellphone and asked me to pick him up at the corner. He was so bruised and broken... it was horrible, I... I didn't know what to do so I drove him to the hospital as fast as I could. Thankfully the roads weren't busy so we got there in about 10 minutes."
"When we finally reached the hospital I had to practically drag him in, he was so bad. The nurses saw him and rushed immediately calling for a bed and a doctor. They asked me what happened but I just wanted to go with Dean, I didn't want to leave him." Sam paused again tears falling and he sniffled. Bryan began to rub soothing circles on Sam's back.
"They told me they had to know and that it was the only way I could help my friend right now. I told them what I knew and I guess they called the cops because they too showed up and I was questioned again. I told them everything I knew about what had happened and about all of his past beatings. They arrested his dad that night."
"When the doctor finally came out of the room he told me that Dean was awake but had severe internal trauma. They said they'd done all they could but there was only a small chance he'd make it. They told me I could go in if I wanted, so I did..." Sam began to tremble and his voice cracked but continued.
"When I got in the room he looked over at me, he always had the most beautiful green eyes and they were shiny from silent tears that were falling. He had machines attached to him everywhere... I was so scared but I didn't want to show it in front of him, so I hid it... for his sake."
"I asked him how he was feeling, he told me he hurt everywhere and he asked if he was dying. I tried to tell him no and that everything was gonna be fine, that he'd pull through it but he saw through me, saw my doubt. He always had a way of doing that. He told me he was sorry, whatever he'd done he was sorry. I shushed him and tried to tell him it wasn't his fault, none of it was. He didn't do anything wrong but he just apologized again and then stared at me silently before..."
Sam paused and he let out a sob. "He told me he loved me. Said he was just always too afraid to tell me, afraid I would hate him. A tear ran down his face as he said it and so I kissed him, just a small kiss and told him I felt the same. That I always had but was too afraid to tell him" - "He smiled at me and I could tell it hurt him but he just said what a couple of idiots we were. I laughed and agreed and right then I thought maybe just maybe everything was gonna be okay..."
"But he got really silent after that and closed his eyes. I held his hand and told him everything was gonna be okay... within a half hour he was gone. I watched him die, Bryan and I couldn't save him. I felt him leave but I couldn't do anything. I failed him." Sam was crying fully now.
"I was the only one in the hospital room with him when he passed too. Other than a nurse I mean. His mom was too busy defending her husband." Sam said it with great sadness and bitterness clear in his voice. "The doctors tried everything but he didn't respond, so they called it. I looked up at the nurse with tears running down my face and asked if he was really gone. She shook her head and said she was so sorry for my loss. I could see she too had unshed tears in her eyes." Sam paused for a few minutes still trembling.
"It was 3 days before his 17th birthday. He was excited. He said it was another year closer to finally getting away from his family." Sam's tears were still falling hard. "It's been 3 years today since he passed and I still miss him so much. I just don't know what to do anymore, Bryan. I want him back." Bryan held Sam in his arms comforting him the best he could while he sobbed hard. A few of his own tears falling too.
Sam eventually cried his way to sleep still clutching the picture of him and Dean tightly against his chest.
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Author's Note: This one kind of hit home for me and it hurts, it really does.
I don't even know what else to say except I don't think I truly captured all the emotion I wanted to in this piece. I did my best though.