The Olympians were sitting in their customary positions in their Council of the Winter Solstice. Of course, with all twelve Olympians in one room…there was bound to be some altercations between all of the family members. It was no surprise that all of the gods had some sort of beef with others of differing tastes and views. As such, it was only customary, for Poseidon and Athena, to engage in avid conversation. (Read: bickering, insults, and the exchange of criticisms based on their two favorite children.)
"Your son could not have survived many of his quests without my daughter!" Athena yelled. Her grey eyes, gifted to her from her father, were blazing and stormy. One could almost say that there were lightning strikes and thunderstorms building up in her irises. If she weren't the goddess of wisdom, she probably would have been one for creating thunderstorms and other such phenomena. "How do you expect him to survive past his teenage years!"
Poseidon, the god of seas and earthquakes, just rolled his eyes in a condescending manner toward his niece. Although he was clearly older and clearly more mature than this war goddess (as mature as one can be when one is thousands of years old and used to getting their way) he did the right thing anyone would do that in that situation.
He fought back with gusto.
"Then I suppose it was wise of your daughter to start moving in on my son." A pause could be heard as the gentleman surveyed the look Athena was pleasantly giving him. The stare could almost be described as positively menacing. He arched an eyebrow in a coy, yet subtle manner. "Don't give me that look, you're looking like one of my fish, it's disgraceful."
"What do you mean, my daughter was the cause—"
"If you were paying attention, like I have," he enunciated properly to show condescension, "then you would have seen that Annatheth Chase was the one to initiate contact. She was the one to ask him out first, she was the one to kiss him first, she was the one—"
"Hold up, hold up!" Athena yelled contrary to her usually conservative behavior. There was no denying that the sea god was really pushing her towards her limit and she would defend her honor no matter what the cause. "The only reason she was the catalyst towards their present relationship was because your son is a total pushover! Like I said, he wouldn't know how to finish a quest if it weren't for the genius that my daughter is!"
If the council wasn't located in the heavens, the ground beneath their feet would have trembled in apocalyptic fury. Poseidon was barely curtailing his anger so that both sides of the US wouldn't get submerged in water.
"My son is not a pushover! He is, above all else, a gentleman. The fact that it took him some time to ask Annabeth out was because he was obviously disgusted by her snooty attitude. It was only out of pity that he decided to date that useless blonde." The sea god also mentally added that Annabeth was by all rights a cougar…but that would have been taking things out of proportion!
"You must be joking, Uncle," Athena practically seethed. Her hands were balled into tight fists and the wise, cool demeanor that she was prided for was gone because of this stupid conversation. "If anyone's useless, than it's obviously—"
"Silence, you two!" Zeus scolded. His eyes, mirror images of Athena's, were the pits of utter destruction and chaos. There was something akin to stress and slight irritation in his features. Beside the King of the Gods, Hera was fanning herself with a fan made of peacock feathers. There was a look of utter disgust settling on her gorgeous face as she watched the warring gods settle down like scolded children. It was quite obvious to everyone that Hera was the one to convince Zeus to interfere, no matter how scary Athena and Poseidon were while fighting.
Poseidon, while he was older than Zeus, slouched back into his throne. On the other hand, Athena looked like she was going to argue the matter further, but one look from her parent was enough to put her back into her place. After all, now was not the time to cross the King of Olympus this early on in the meeting.
The King of all the deities in the room sighed for a second before he turned his handsomely chiseled face towards the rest of the gods in the room.
"Now, what shall we talk about for this Winter Solstice?"
Hades raised his hand, a dark leer on his face.
Another sigh, this time filled with sarcasm and loathing towards his eldest brother.
"Let me rephrase, what can we talk about that doesn't involve me stepping down and giving someone else the reigns for once."
Hades let his hand waver in the air for a second before putting it back down. The pure darkness of his robes became almost pitch dark as Tartarus; one can almost hear the screams of tortured souls whenever Hades shifted in his seat. Shuddering slightly, Zeus turned away from his eldest brother and turned towards his fellow Olympians.
"I think we should talk about how awesome I am!" Apollo cried aloud. There was a stack of paper on his lap, all filled with scribbles of his haikus. Everyone visibly flinched when Apollo took one of the papers inside the stack and brought it towards his face. Clearing his throat so that his voice wouldn't sound too shrill or nothing short of awesome, he began. "First, the sun rises—"
"Shut up! Your haikus are so bad, even your children can't stand them!" Artemis crowed. Notching an arrow into her bow, she casually let her dangerous fly right into her twin's general vicinity. However, because of godly magic, Apollo was able to avoid getting himself stabbed a la older-sister-itis. Despite him not getting the hit, his papers were now freefalling onto the ground; the array of chicken scratch and grammatical atrocities were now coating the floor.
"How dare you!" Fake, obnoxious tears fell readily out of Apollo's eyes, almost as if he was preparing for this confrontation like he would for one of Dionysus' plays. Puffing out his chest proudly, he proclaimed, "All of my children love—"
Just when Apollo was going to preach off to his sister with another haiku, a certain goddess of love decided to intervene.
"Did someone mention love? No worries, all of your relationships will soon be interfered with shortly!" All of the males visibly brightened at her voice, all eyes on her…voluptuous figure that pleased almost everyone in attendance. (Hera had had half a mind to throw her fan at the love goddess in order to get the meeting in order. But, she also wanted to find out what Aphrodite was going on about.)
The queen of the gods, however, decided to add her two cents.
"Shut it, you hussy! No one wants to have more demigods running around!"
"But demigods are fun to mess with! The way they fight over the simplest of things! It's like a war down there!"
"That's because capturing the flag is like a war down there," Athena emphasized in a patronizing manner. Daintily, she crossed her arms in front of her chest in a show of superiority. She had already lost a fight to Poseidon—not like she was going to admit that—and she didn't want to let Ares get away with that comment without some retribution.
"No one dies," Ares fought back with a sneer. The masochistic side of him thought that if he goaded her long enough, then others would take notice and take part in the argument as well. Fortunately for Ares, Poseidon decided to participate in the recent turn of events.
"I have to agree with that," Poseidon said. The war god gave his uncle a grateful smile—or sneer—and gave him a fist bump, fully ignoring Athena's petulant form. Grinning, Poseidon gave his archenemy a look that spoke volumes of his hatred for her.
Athena paused for a second before letting her anger guide her next few words.
"Is your brain filled with water or are you seriously talking to me again after I clearly won our earlier argument?"
"Excuse me? It appears that your time hanging around books has dulled your senses when clearly—"
"Hahaha! You know, you look a lot like your children! They were so witty in their bickering, so alive with passion…" Aphrodite swooned as she let her imagination take over. Seeing how the two opposing deities were actively ignoring her, Aphrodite decided to speak again. This time, a mischievous glint had entered her eyes when she said, "You know, Percy dreams of getting married to Annabeth!"
It was at that moment that every Olympian decided it was time to shut up and watch as the two rivals stared at the goddess of love in a mixture of incredulity and horror. It was like a switch that was just turned on for that precise moment in time. For those who still retained their sanity, they all cowered in fear at what was going to happen next. For those who absolutely loved it when their meetings went awry, they hurriedly conjured up buttered popcorn and various other refreshments to fully enjoy the free show.
"What!? That little, insipid—" A large trident was summoned in one of his fists, the waves down below on earth were beating against the coastlines, all of which were steadily gaining momentum and becoming large waves.
"And Annabeth," Athena did not want to hear what Aphrodite was going to say, but something told her that she wanted to know, "is already making up names for their three imaginary children!"
"Preposterous! That will never—"
Hera straightened in her chair and let out a groan before massaging her temples.
"Must we always talk about the illegitimates? All they ever do is run around and get themselves in trouble."
Everyone collectively glared at the queen.
"They're also great with romances: love triangles, one-sided, unrequited…" Aphrodite swooned again as Hephaestus built an impromptu fan to cool her off. The scent of ambrosia, girly things, and other aromas spread across the room.
"Aren't one-sided and unrequited romances the same thing?" Hermes reasoned.
"That's not the point." A girlish pout could be seen on her flawless complexion as she tried her best to explain true love to her companions. "The point is that I have found favor in one particular demigod so that he may always be the center of attention from anyone he meets!"
"And who would that be?" Artemis muttered out of disinterest.
"Who do you think?" Aphrodite looked around the room only to be met with faces that were bored, disinterested, or confused. "You can't be serious! Who is the demigod who broke at least four hearts in the course of four years, one right after the other?"
"Yeah, not getting it."
"Duh, Percy Jackson." How could they not have gotten that, Aphrodite speculated mentally. The goddess of love rolled her eyes as everyone besides Poseidon decided to glare at her.
"Well, it appears my good looks are in good hands." Poseidon said in wonder.
"What do you mean good looks? I'm better looking than you! In fact, your son is nothing compared to Jason!" Ah, looks like Zeus wanted to join in on the argument.
"Haha, he's too perfect to be considered a heartbreaker. No, the real handsome, bad boy is my son, Percy!"
"Both of you are wrong, Nico is perfectly capable of being a heartbreaker." There was a bright smile of pure creepiness as the eldest brother of the Big Three tried his best to intimidate his brothers. Looking so smug, one might have thought that he would have won that argument and that he might have a chance of getting full control of the meeting. Regrettably, all he got was a beat of silence from his siblings before getting a verbal answer.
"Hades," both of his younger brothers deadpanned. "Nico doesn't count."
The Lord of the Dead let that one sink in for a minute before turning towards his brothers, righteous fury emanating from his figure.
"That's demigod discrimination!"
Poseidon slyly shook his head slowly as he stared down the dark god.
"It doesn't matter; Nico is infatuated with my son. Therefore, it only goes to show how attractive my son is."
Zeus and Hades looked at each other, baffled at how ridiculous Poseidon sounded. Just because Nico was…Maybe…Okay, so maybe Poseidon was right about that one point, but he's still and idiot and so was his son. A silent conversation took place between two of the three gods (Read again: the sentence prior to this one) before a conclusion was made.
"…Your son is a pimp."
"You got that right," Poseidon huffed in satisfaction. Suddenly, it dawned on him. "That wasn't sarcasm, was it?"
"Enough about how likable the demigod is when paired with other mortals. I think the major achievement for the son of the Sea God is if any of us decides that he's attractive. Which he is not!" Athena contradicted. This was going on far too long! The meeting had to go back on schedule!
"I think all of us would agree that he's not that attractive," Aphrodite murmured, the look of contemplation on her pale complexion. That expression was so out of place on her face that most of the other Olympians were taken aback at her seriousness. "But he has the ability to be downright sexy."
"You think my son's sexy!"
"I think the real test for the boy is if he was found to be attractive by one of the virgin goddesses."
"Haha, that won't be necessary!" Athena crowed. "Everyone knows that I won't choose him and Artemis won't either!"
Heads began to nod as most of the gods began to look apologetically at the sea god. There was no good thinking that any of the virgin goddesses would ever go after Percy Jackson. Despite the negativity in the room, only one god of mischief decided to speak up for the poor demigod boy and his father. Besides, there was only one another virgin goddess in the room and believe it or not, she was actually listening.
"What about Hestia?"
"Fine," Athena made it sound like she knew what the eldest god in existence was about to say, "Hestia, would you date Percy Jackson just because of his good looks?"
The little girl near the hearth gave Poseidon a sad look before looking towards her niece.
"No."
"See what—"
"I would marry him."
Money was exchanged and an angry Athena had to be placated.