A 911 call were made around 4 am. A murder had taken place in an office building, and the cops were on their way. David Lock had been shot to death by Tom Williams, so he would stop trying to sleep with his fiancè, Greta Mastriani. The 911 call were made by Charlie Coleman, who started out as a suspect, since he was a professional rival of the victim. Detectives Beckett, Ryan and Esposito arrived at the crime scene with ME Perlmutter. Castle arrived at the precinct when they brought the suspects in.
The Case was over. A man shot in a parking garage by his romantic rival, witnessed by his professional. Open and shut, case closed. A case so easy it wasn't even affected by the emotional turmoil faced by the lead detective.
A vast distance had appeared since the bombing, and with that distance a growing sense of despair had gathered around detective Kate Beckett.
She had tried, really tried to mend bridges with him, after she got over the hurt that came with Jacinda, that brainless stewardess. First she tried to make him come after her, tried to make him jealous by spending time with Colin Hunt, but it just pushed him farther away. Then she got his back throughout the whole Slaughter debacle, only to be met with only a little surprise when he found out that she sat her job in jeopardy to hold him safe.
That surprise were what she held onto until he told her it would be his case.
Now they were in the bullpen, done with the case, and apparently done with Castle too.
She didn't comprehend.
Didn't comprehend that he would leave.
Didn't comprehend that he wouldn't be there. Not for her. Not anymore.
She didn't even know why.
Didn't he love her?
Then would he leave her now?
Why would he suddenly turn from warm and funny and kind and helpful...
Turn to cold, distant, uncaring and... not Castle?
Her musings were interrupted as Castle made his farewell with Esposito and Ryan, making a joke that Gates should have been there, as it would be one of the greatest moments of her life.
He turns and starts to walk towards the elevators, stopping at your barely voiced "Castle".
He spins slowly, looks at you with sad eyes. "Goodbye, Beckett", the sad farewell you did not want to hear. He turns around again, starts walking.
Starts walking away from you.
Your despair almost darkens the room, crushes your shoulders down, filling your lungs with ash and squeezes your heart. "no" you her yourself say, a strangled voice you don't recognize, tears welling in your eyes, running down your cheeks.
"No" you say again louder this time, Esposito and Ryan looks at you, but you don't see them, you see only Castle, walking towards the elevators.
"No" you cry out, collapsing on your knees as the tears and the pain take over, hurting over a future lost, as the man you love above everything else is walking away from you.
You can't see anymore.
The whole bullpen is in shock, but you don't register it.
Finally, the impervious Beckett has shattered. Everyone caught by surprise.
Including a man hurting because he thinks you don't love him, a man that has been with you through everything, a man who loves you.
A man who turned away from the elevators.
Your last case. Done
No more precinct. No more cases. No more Ryan or Esposito.
No more Kate.
No more banter, no more theorizing, no more love.
He can't face it anymore.
No one except his family love him.
No one except his family will ever love him.
He has been proven that time and again.
You cannot make someone family, they will not learn to love you.
The only love you can receive is from family, but it isn't enough.
It isn't enough that only people related to you can love you. The rest either hates you or are infatuated with you, for your lesser qualities. Money that isn't worth anything real, Humor that you adopted as a defense mechanism for all the hurt in the world. No one likes the loving father, no one loves the imaginative boy. People either hate or like the facade. The you that isn't you, that doesn't really exist.
You believed in Beckett, that she cared, maybe even loved you. But no, she just needs you for her self esteem, a best selling author at her beck and call, teasing humor to make him ignore the leash.
You tried to aspire to the ideals set by your Kate, to bring justice to the world, to the victims, make the guilty pay. It isn't enough. Not enough to be able to work with her. Not enough that police work isn't a too strong reminder of her.
So you make use of your last alternative. You leave. Leave this world behind. This world of implied, but unfulfilled promises. You say goodbye to the boys. It's harder than it should be, so you armor yourself with humor.
You walk towards the elevators as you hear Beckett say "Castle"
You think you imagine its despair covering her voice, she's just sad that her puppy is leaving.
You look at her, can't keep the sadness away. "Goodbye, Beckett" you are disappointed that you can't keep the sadness away from your voice.
You turn around and walk away, hoping the hurt will lessen.
You hear a muffled sound, but continue to walk.
You hear a "No" from Beckett, thinking bitterly that she could have treated you better, not led you on like a lovesick teenager.
Then you hear one thing you have never heard before, a "No" coming from a crying Beckett. You turn around, and as you see her kneeling on the floor, crying, you know you can't walk away from her, even if it hurts, it will hurt more if she is hurting too.
A/N
This is my first Fanfic, so criticism is welcomed. I plan for one or two more chapters, but I may be open to ideas if you have some. Thank you for reading