Losing Hope

By: Shailene Tisdale

It was Christmas Eve. Clark had just returned home from another long day at the Planet, when he found a mysterious package waiting for him on his doorstep. There was no return address or anything on it so Clark was naturally curious yet cautious at the same time. Upon opening the package, he noticed a CD inside with two simple words written on it in what was quite possibly the single most familiar writing to him. "Play Me". Instantly recognizing the handwriting as that of Lex Luthor, Clark placed the disc into his stereo and pressed play. A soft melody began to play as Lex began singing in a surprisingly beautiful manner.

"The day a door is closed

The echoes fill your soul

They won't say which way to go

Just trust your heart

To find what you're here for

Open another door

But, I'm not sure anymore

It's just so hard"

Clark couldn't believe what he was hearing. He could feel time and effort and emotion and heart Lex was pouring into the song. He couldn't help feeling sorry for Lex. Even though Lex would loathe the pity. Clark mused as he continued listening as the music took a sudden and drastic turn and Lex's voice followed soon after with a drastically angrier and more frustrated tone.

"Voices in my head

Tell me they know best

Got me on the edge

They're pushin pushin-they're pushin'

I know they've got a plan

But, the ball's in my hands

This time it's man to man

I'm fightin, drivin, inside

A world that's upside down

And spinnin' faster"

Clark was beginning to sense that the song he was listening to had been written about him. He could feel Lex singing about they're broken friendship. And, it seemed to be hurting him more than Clark had realized. But, then Clark began to realize that it wasn't a friendship Lex wanted back.

"What do I do now-without you

I don't know where to go

What's the right team

I want my own thing

So bad I'm gonna scream

I can't choose so confused

What's it all mean

I want my own dream

So bad I'm gonna scream"

As the song progressed, Clark was beginning to realize that Lex was in love with him. This discovery shocked Clark to the core. Sure, he had fallen for the man years ago when they had first met. But, he never would have dreamed that Lex would feel the same way about Clark. Afterall, that was exactly Clark's reason for never telling Lex how he really felt over the years. He always assumed that Lex would just think he was a freak and would never want anything else to do with him. The thought of losing his friend over it all terrified Clark and convinced him to remain silent. But, as the song progressed, he knew he couldn't stay silent any longer.

"Yeah, the clock's running down

Hear the crowd getting loud

Is it him, is it love?

Can the music ever be enough?

Gotta work it out, you can work it out

You can do it you can do it"

The more Clark heard, the more he knew what he had to do. By the end of the song, Clark had flown out the door on his way to the Luthor mansion. However, he could never have been prepared for the sight that welcomed him when he arrived. Upon arrival, Clark had been let inand went up to Lex's infamous study. He knew something was wrong right away when the door was locked. Breaking through the lock, Clark felt his heart racing faster and faster as he began picturing all the different possible scenarios of what he might find. All of them terrified him, but, none more so than the reality of what he found in front of him.