What He Really Meant to Say

By Felicia

Author's Note: I know that given Gina's pregnancy last night's interlude between Nate and Sophie was well nigh next to impossible to write any other way. However, in my perfect little Leverage universe, this is how I would have had it play out.

Disclaimer: If I was at all associated with Leverage, Dean Devlin, Tim Hutton or Gina Bellman the above author's note would not need to be written.

1/1

The knock at her door surprised her, but the identity of the visitor shook her to the very core. He had said they wouldn't call her again so a personal visit could only mean…

She panicked throwing open the door certain of the worst. "Who's dead? Which one!" She grabbed his forearms her fingernails biting his skin through his overcoat and sweater and jerked him into her apartment.

Stunned by her supposition, Nate caught his breath. The pain undergirding her demands and shining in her glassy eyes rended his heart. Of course she would jump to death being the reason for his visit. He silently cursed himself for how badly he had handled their last phone call. Maybe today he would make amends. He pulled her quickly to him pressing a kiss to her temple and whispered, "Shhh, love, no one's dead. They're all fine."

She sagged against him in relief letting him take the slight weight of her lithe body for a moment. As the panic eased, anger stole its place in a heady transition. She flung herself away pacing to the windows only to swing back seconds later to fully look at him. "Dammit, Nate!" she cried, her words muted by the tears she barely held in check. She dragged her fingers through her hair smoothing the kiss he had so reprehensibly placed. Her skin still tingled at the memory of his lips. "Don't do that to me again!"

His eyes trailed her fingers as they soothed the place his lips had so recently touched and prayed that her edict referred not to the kiss but to the potential bad news. If it were the former, then he was already too late. Nate stepped more fully into her apartment and closed the door. His eyes bore the apology before his words shocked her again. "I didn't come because of them."

She stood silent, rapt by the tone of his words and the haunting in his eyes. Her hands clenched her kimono. Once again she marshaled her defenses against the familiar pain of their dance even as she willed this conversation to be different from all the others.

Concerned by her lack of response, Nate cleared his throat and rushed onward. "We need you as a team. ..and…and…they need you as their friend…their mentor. But, um," he paused, took a fortifying breath, "But I'm not here for them."

She still didn't respond. In truth, Nate couldn't really blame her. They had been down this road so many times before only to hit the same dead end. He closed his eyes and then began to take the first step onto unpaved territory: "I came here for me. Because of what I need."

A sharp intake of breath was her only response but it emboldened him to at least open his eyes. "It's true that the team isn't the same without you, but the greater truth is…I'm not the same without you." Hearing himself finally speak the words he had felt for years, indecision threatened to overwhelm him. He couldn't look at her but neither could he continue to simply stand there.

She watched pinned between hope and disappointment as he turned and surveyed her living room. Barely allowing herself to breathe for fear of shattering the moment, she stood still as he took in the eclectic mixture of accessories and furniture before settling his gaze on the gorgeous view outside her window.

A handful of moments later, he spoke. "I-I order your drink at client meetings. I look for you every time I open a door. I even slept with your favorite dress because it still smelled of your perfume. .." He turned and found her standing much as she had been at the wedding two years ago tears streaming down her cheeks. "You're the first thing I think about when I wake up and the last person I want to talk to before I fall asleep. You've seen me at my worst and there's no one on this earth that I care more about. Come back to me. I need you, Soph—"

Before he could finish, she laid two fingers over his lips and corrected with a stunning smile and a Cockney accent, "Annie. It's Annie."

Joy soared through him as he kissed her fingertips and whispered, "Annie."

Sophie now Annie closed her eyes as the sound washed over her. After all the lies, the identities, the miscommunications, finally nothing but truth stood between them. But instead of dividing them, it was a glue that would bind them together. As his lips found hers she knew that now there was only one truth left to voice and she breathed it against his lips sealing it between them: "I love you, Nate."

(end)

*I selected the Cockney accent as Sophie's real accent due to a blog entry from John Rogers on the subject of the Beantown Bailout Job. The name I came up with on my own. Please let me know your thoughts!