A/N: I luve Buffy, so I finally worked up the courage to try a short story. Hope I do it some justice, and that you get a laugh out of it.
Disclaimer: Whendon is a God! I grovel at his feet. Oh, and I don't own Buffy or even of the show's genious.
First chapter character: Spike
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He'd been gone from the Summers home for a while, but opening the door and passing the living room, Spike heard it again; that horrid noise, echoing just as clearly as the day he'd left. It sent shivers up his spine every time. If he had his way, he'd go the rest of his life without hearing it again. But it was impossible, now there was no escaping it. Spike froze in place; he was being haunted, punished!
It took a light prod from Buffy to remind him where he was going, and that this time, he would be safe. He gripped the plastic grocery bag in his hands; he had some insurance this time around. He was definitely planning on keeping his sanity securely in tacked.
It had all started when the very first potential had shown up, and had only gotten worse since.
Those girls, those creepy, wide eyed (and highly hormonal he might add) teens, he just wasn't used to the look they gave him. And the collective sigh or squee every time he left the room; it was like they thought he couldn't hear them!
Not that his awareness would bother some of the more aggressive ones….. he could see it in their eyes. He let off an involuntary shiver. The little blonde girl was the worst. The night she had come to the basement was still with him. That night two weeks ago….
Spike'd been ling there, minding his own business, and dozed off. It was unheard of for anyone to come down to the basement without him noticing, so he'd let his defenses slip. The next thing he saw when he opened his eyes was her, right in his face, she'd been sitting there, staring for who knew how long! Blooy! It'd scared him senseless. She looked up at him with big doe eyes.
"Take me," was all she said, throwing her arms around him, it'd been enough to send him straight off the deep end. Up the stairs in record time, he had promptly headed for the door and gone missing.
All these little fan girls, it was just wrong! Maybe the old Spike'd get a kick out of that but with the heavy dose of William in his system it set him off his rocker.
When Buffy had finally tracked him down Spike had refused to return without a solid promise of privacy, three strong locks, and some sturdy ear plugs. All of which were in the plastic bag he currently held onto for dear life. Back to the lion's, or rather lioness's den Spike thought dully.
Just then a group of girls came out of the living room and into the hall twords them. It was the potentials, big smiles on their faces. The blond girl was in the front, heading directly twowards him. This is so degrading, Spike though, bristling.
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A/N: Let me know if you want more. Just push the little button on your way out! You know you want to.
Ta!