Pre-Author's Note: Yes, the note is long, but you need to read it first. It's very important.
Author's Note: I always wondered about Alice, but I could never find any stories about how her vampiric life began. So I decided to write one. It may seem kind of ... Un-Alice right now (slightly depressed, not all that super-happy), but that's because she wasn't just BORN super hyper - think about it. She's a VAMPIRE, for God's sake. And she's ALONE. She needs time to develope her Alice-like tendencies, and they will come quickly. :)
Disclaimer: The marvelous world of Twilight belongs, not to me, - sigh – but to the equally marvelous Stephenie Meyer.
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Moonlit Hopes, Never Fade
The Alice Cullen Story
Destined To Die
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1920, Biloxi, Mississippi
I opened my eyes, and saw light. It was so incredibly bright and glorious that I was temporarily blinded, my eyes waiting to adjust. When they did, I saw the most beautiful scene, of blues and greens and yellows, of rainbows and wildflowers, everything that I could name, but felt as if I had never seen them before. It was like being born again. But when was I first born? I didn't know. I didn't know where I was, or what I was. And suddenly, I felt very alone.
There was one thing playing over and over in my mind: Alice, Alice, Alice. It must be my name, I thought. I stared around myself – I was in a very small clearing, as if it had been cleared perfectly and specifically for me to lie there; it was jut slightly longer than I was each way. I had been lying on the leaves and twigs and bracken in the dull light of the forest. I gazed at my surroundings, marveling in the beauty and clarity of it all, suddenly overcome with excitement and joy, bouncing on my heels. Everything was so gorgeous! If only I had someone to share it with.
All at once, my vision became obscured at the edges – it was as if I had double vision. I was seeing the forest less and less; the picture was murkier and murkier, replaced by something else. I was seeing a family, or people that fit together like one. They were all about the same age – I could tell there was less than ten years difference between the oldest and the youngest – and there were five of them. They were all beaming and smiling, racing each other through the woods, occasionally tackling one another.
Then, I saw the forest again.
Something stirred in my memory – as sleeping fragment, which had almost woken, but not quite. I had almost remembered something, but then it had vanished. Odd. I wondered what I was doing alone in the forest, and with a sharp pang of loneliness I realized that I wanted a family like that, too. They had so many people to look after them, talk with them, laugh with them, share with them. I had no one. But I wanted someone, a family – and somehow, I would get one.
Suddenly, my vision was fading again, something new was coming back – it was the same five people, but this time there was two more – a tall, muscular honey blond-haired boy, and a very small, black haired girl. I knew at once that this girl was me, though I had never seen myself. I was with the family! And we were happy! There had to be a way to get to them, then … And I would find it.
Turning to survey my surroundings once again, I found no trails or broken branches or fallen trees that would suggest that someone had been through here. It was as if I had always been here, but had only just realized it, as if I had been carved from stone, and was just now alive. I wondered if that's what I was – if I had been only a marble statue. I had no idea what was happening. But if I was going to find the family, I had to start looking.
I knew from my vision that the family was in a forest very unlike this one. Theirs wasn't shadowy and sinister, but open and bright. I didn't know which way their forest would be, and I didn't know what I would find beyond the forest, but I made a split-second decision to run, and peeled off in a random direction, hoping to find something.
I was amazed by the soothing sensation of running – the wind whipping through my hair, not quite fast enough to get to the rest of me, the trees, grass, and forest life zooming fast so quickly that I barely had time to register it all. The feeling was so freeing. It was the closest thing to flying, I decided. I felt alone when I was running – but not the sad kind of alone I felt before, a happy, peaceful, still kind of alone, as if I was completely safe if I just kept running.
It took me less than thirty seconds to be rid of the forest. That surprised even me, as I wasn't sure what to expect outside of the clearing, and I thought I had been further in the woods than that. Now, I was suddenly standing on the edge of a strange settlement – a town, I realized, not knowing how I knew – there were people bustling around, weaving in and out of each other's way, and in and out of peculiar structures. I watched for a moment, mesmerized by their simplicity, and then, it hit me.
The awful burning – searing – as if a flame with claws was making its way up my throat – ripping at the muscle and tissue, burning unquenchably, making my throat painfully dry. No amount of gulping or tearing at my skin would do anything. But, even stronger than the disgusting feeling of thirst, was the powerful thing that came at me full-speed now.
The smell. It was the most glorious scent I would ever smell, I knew that right away. It was delicious, beckoning, teasing me for not being able to taste it. I could hear a loud thumping, a dull beat, getting louder and louder, closer and closer, everything overwhelming me. I felt savage – like some kind of wild animal. My throat was burning, and gulping was not ridding me of the sensation, but making it worse. I'm dying. I thought sadly, and I had only just begun to live.
Then, all at once, the thumping, and the delicious smell, the breathy voice, humming softly – they were right behind me. Moving quickly, unable to slow myself down, I turned and lunged at whatever it was. My teeth sunk themselves into flesh, deeper and deeper, liquid, warm, yet cool, was flooding my mouth. It was exquisite, and it put out the fire. I was unbelievably relieved, and savored every short second of the pouring deliciousness. All too soon, the thudding stopped underneath me, and the warmth slowly began to drain from the creature I had lunged on. I could feel it becoming cold underneath me, slowly, very slowly, and it made me desperately sad to think that the drink was gone. It had been so irresistible – so unbelievably perfect.
Standing back, I realized that the prey I had just attacked and killed was remarkably reminiscent of the family I had been watching. I had killed a person. A person who had, just minutes ago, been smiling and humming, wandering about in the forest behind me, his whole life ahead of him. The longing for his blood subsided into a feeling of desperate confusion. Was I supposed to have killed someone like me? Was that what I was made for – to kill them all? I was confused, and hurt. He had tasted so good …
Was it really only minutes ago that I had opened my eyes to the light, that I had breathed my first breath, felt the unstoppable joy and ecstasy that came from experiencing such a glorious world? It didn't feel like that any more. Maybe the family wouldn't accept me now. I couldn't condemn them to having me. I needed to get away – that was why I was alone. Because I was dangerous, a killer. Maybe I had seen the family because I was supposed to get them next. I couldn't do it. I wouldn't.
I turned on my heel and flung my tiny body back into the trees, barely hearing the screams behind me, as the people from the settlement at last happened across the bodies of the hikers.
I didn't know why I had become alive; if I was a vicious creature, but I needed to separate myself from the ones that I could hurt … I could already feel the thirst, the fire, coming back full force.
Author's Note: Okay ... Let me know if it's stupid. All I like about it is the first two paragraphs, and it's frustrating me right now to think of it. I reeally hope I can do Alice justice later. I feel like her emotions are always so extreme. She's always extremely bright and happy, but that when she IS sad, she's extremely sad. So, yeah. I'm not in a rush to finish this one, so I hope that will make it better. There's not a lot about Alice's past in the books, so it's going to be a bit of a challenge. :)