I have written this story as a token of my admiration for Jiraiya. I never really got over losing the pervy sage let alone never truly being able to see him get to love Tsunade after all those years. I've worked endlessly on this story writing it out on note book paper playing with a lot of different ways to bring this story into light. I wanted to keep it as much like the original story line as possible while creating a love story in the back ground. This story starts while Naruto and the 8 other genin rookie teams are starting the preliminary rounds in the first chunin exams. Right before Jiraiya returns to the leaf village. This is my master piece yet I own nothing and that's probably for the best. Enjoy!

He rested his head on his arms on the edge of the hot spring. Tension practically swam out of his body as the heat soaked his tired muscles. Nothing could beat a good soak in a hot spring, he thought closing his opal eyes. Two long red lines ran from under each of his eyes down to the bottom of his jaw line. Across his back where several scars from battle over the years. Some so deep still you could feel the grooves they had left behind if you touched them. Jiraiya, 48, was one of the finest ninja of all time. Yet, for the past 13 years no one really "knew" Jiraiya. The man had left his village to be a hermit, to travel the world, sleep with beautiful woman and write his books. He loved it. Actually he preferred it. The less people the less troubles he had. Jiraiya had come to that conclusion 13 years ago when he briefly spent some time in the village hidden in the leaf. He had raised his students served in a war and now it was his time to do as he pleased and that was that.

The bath house doors behind him slid open and he decided to stay to himself. He had picked a gender friendly hot spring in the hopes of meeting a beautiful woman for the night but his body was sore from his three day walk from the land of water. He heard two woman talking just behind him to the right as the steam in the air moved over the water. Unintentionally he began to listen to their conversation.

"I can't believe you at all. Pulling a trick like that," The first woman who spoke had a soft voice, despite her scolding tone.

"It's not a trick. Calm down. Just enjoy it. It's not like you won't help me spend it." The second woman had a sweet voice like honey.

"It's going to catch up with you eventually."

"Eventually, I'm going to win big. I won't have to worry about anything after that. That's the plan."

"Lady Tsunade. I don't think that's a good plan at all," Jiraiya's eyes shot open as his whole body went ridged with fear.

"Shizune, please, just relax. Literally, you giving me a head ache,"

I'm going to die today, Jiraiya thought, trying not to move. He knew he recognized the voice. Why he didn't realize it was her was beside him. He considered how this could go, what he could do. She hadn't seen him, or so he hoped she hadn't. It wasn't like he was peaking. He wasn't being a perv, and there was no way he could have known she was going to be there. Actually he had been there first he reminded himself trying to calm his nerves. He wondered if he pulled himself out of the water and leave without her noticing him. If he stayed she might realize it was him as if his long white hair wasn't a dead giveaway already, the scars on his back would give him away as well considering it was by her hand most of them where healed, some she even left herself.

His stomach turned. He knew turning around to see her would bring out a conversation no one wanted. Even though he craved doing so. He feared this woman above all others but he also loved her than any other living soul. She was the reason he had left the village. She broke his heart. Yet, he couldn't blame her for the things that had happened. He was to blame for not going home after the war. He couldn't simply neglect his responsibilities to help other though and potentially fulfill his prophesy. She blamed him for all of it and he knew it.

Jiraiya took a deep steadying breath and made a decision. Slowly, he pulled himself up on the edge of hot spring placing his foot down and standing. His back facing the woman. Grabbing his towel he wrapped it around his bare waist tightly and turned trying to walk and not run to the male changing rooms. He kept his eyes on his feet and willed all the gods to let him make it out of this hot spring alive. Disappearing behind the door he let out a breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding. He rubbed his face with his hands as he sat down in front of his clothing locker. It was too late in the evening to hop town even though that what he wanted to do. He had to meet with his publisher first thing in the morning. After that he would disappear. Jiraiya dressed quickly, sliding on his red sash over his green kimono, then his pack, scroll and wooden shoes. As he stood and walked towards the exit he knew one thing for sure. That was that he had gotten away unharmed by the other shinobi.

Sliding open the door before him he realized he began celebrating his victory a moment too soon. A finely manicured hand flew out and smacked him across the face. Searing pain blinded his view for a second as he stumbled backwards, "Son of a bitch," he said breathlessly. His eyes screwing shit as he grabbed his cheek. He didn't want to open his eyes. He could see the anger on that beautiful face in his head. He didn't want to see it, didn't want to hear her angry words. Reluctantly his eyes opened for he had no choice but to face her if he ever wanted to get away. Maybe he could run. He was considering any possible way to escape as his eyes fell on the much shorter woman before him.

He stood a good foot over her and yet here he was plagued with fear. There was that face. Just as he remembered it. Her eyebrows pulled together in an angry way and her full pink lips where a hard line. She stood there, arms crossed under her large breasts in a white bathrobe. "Tsunade! What a surprise!" he exclaimed reaching up a hand to rub the back of his neck nervously. "Not a good one really, but…" His eyes ran down her body, "You look good! I love the new look but I'm sure we can both agree that you'd look much better without that bath robe." His body tensed with anticipation to be hit. He couldn't he always had to poke the bear, had to see where he stood. With that his reflexes acted on their own when she was around. He knew better then to let his guard down after all the years of blows he had taken from her due to his side comments.

"Cut the crap Jiraiya. You're 48 years old for crying out loud. Do you really think I didn't see you walk out of the hot spring?"

"I prayed that much," he replied in a disappointed tone. His eyes met hers and he saw a world of pain and questions in those soft brown orbs. Jiraiya sighed. He hadn't expected to see that much pain on display there before him. There would be no getting out of this. He was defeated.

"What the hell is wrong with you?"

"I man do you really want to do this right now? I was leaving! What did you want me to do? Come over and say HI and possibly die? HA! Yeah right!"

"Jiraiya! It's been 12 years!" his name fell out of her mouth with such agony and heart ache he felt his heart clench in pain. He wanted to crumble away to nothing.

He raised his hand, "Wrong. It's been 11 years." He clapped his hands together and smiled hopefully, "Let's forget this happened and aim for 30 years yeah?" with a failed attempt, he tried to step past her. But she blocked him giving him a hard glare. "Oh come on! Leave me alone Tsunade!" Jiraiya loved her. So much that he drowned himself in solitude and only entertained the same woman once. He wanted her in a way she would never let be. So why try anymore? Why stand here and try to talk about the past?

She studied his face for a moment before looking at the ground, "I'll be at the casino in town tonight. If you care to get a drink with me later I'd like that… I think you owe me that much at least." She stepped aside slowly letting him pass. She watched as he quickly took several long strides away before stopping. His back facing her.

"I'm meeting my publisher tomorrow. I need to sleep. I can't be out all night reminiscing about the past." His eyes fixed on the ground, "I might come find you though." His hands grasped the straps of his bag on his shoulders and he forced himself to continue to walk away from her. He had escaped with a heavy heart. This Jiraiya, is why you are a hermit. He thought going to find an inn.

After the war, Tsunade had returned home and Jiraiya had stayed in the land of rain to become the sensei to three war orphans. Before meeting them, be knew he would return home and start his life with his best friend, Tsunade. Three years passed though and he couldn't blame her for finding a man that loved her. Dan. He remembered the day he first saw her in his arms. The heart he had intended to give her shattered in his chest. He avoided her for the first week he had been back. What could he say to her? Nothing. She was happy. He could never in a million years come in the way of her happiness. She would never know or understand why he chose to stay away. She only felt her own anger, never once considering his pain.

He remembered her anger though, her pain. When she had yelled at him in a local bar for avoiding her. All he could do was fight fire with fire back then. Arguing in the back all, "You left Jiraiya. Those kids may have needed you but so did I!"

"So it's all my fault? You could have stayed with me, with them!"

"We had just finished a war Jiraiya! We hadn't been home in almost two years!" she screamed at him as he towered menacingly over her.

"So what! It's not like you had anything to come home to Tsunade. If I was so important to you I was right there. I'm not the only one who walked away you know. Hell, you got real comfortable here in the village without me,"

"Your where gone for three years!" tears rolled down her face as she pushed him forcefully her anger consuming her.

"Well, forget about me then!" he grabbed her by her arms, "I TOOK CARE OF CHILDREN. You where fucking some- some guy! You were all talk. I'm a joke to you Tsunade. I always have been!" he looked her dead on as she pounded his chest with little fists.

"I don't know how to fix it!" Jiraiya stepped away from her as her emotions over took her.

He spoke low, "You can't. I can't. What's done is done. I'm tired of living in the past Tsunade. Just forget the past will you? Now leave me alone." He had left her there. Crying in that ally.

The two never spoke much after that. Only as comrades in passing. He published his first book shortly after Minato Namikaze was appointed the 4th Hokage. Dan died in battle, Jiraiya had heard but kept his distance. No more than a month later, Jiraiya was asked to be the god father of Minato and Kushina's son to be. Naruto, named after the hero in his book.

8 months later was the attack of the nine tailed fox on the lea village. Returning home he met his god son. Unable to take the boy with him, the Kubi inside him. He left the boy telling him he would be back one day to train him to be the best ninja in the world. Orochimaru went rogue. Jiraiya left to find him. As he left town he sat on a roof across from Tsunade's apartment. He watched the woman at her desk for a good hour as she pored over books and paper work. Then he left.

Jiraiya fell on the bed in the room he rented playing the line of events over and over again in his head. People caused pain. His way in seeing it, he was doing the right thing living his life the way he was. And yet, there she was, making him say maybe. Maybe it was time it was time for a change. Maybe she had something to say that would change everything. He closed his eyes and sighed. Maybe he would take a nap before he went to find her. Walking for three days had made him sore and the hot spring had done its job. He was ready for sleep. He grabbed the clock on the side table and set the alarm for 9:30pm. It was just past 5 and he was going to need the sleep if he had to deal with Tsunade tonight.

Thank you for your continued interest in the story! A few changes have been made. Not many. Keep following! Thank you!