Hey everybody, glad you're back! As we all know, I don't own the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. If you haven't read my first fic about Leo and Karai, that's fine, because this is completely unrelated. I started writing it after Same as it Never Was. At that point in the show Leo and Karai's relationship (last seen together in Hun on the Run with Karai in Leo's lap and actually thanking him) was completely open to go any direction. Yes, I realize that after Exodus and especially Bad Day Karai proved herself to not feel this way, making my take completely wrong. But I'd already started writing and liked the idea, so I'm posting and continuing it anyway. So, this is what might have been…

Define Loyalty

Ch 1

Daydreams and Nightmares

Hmmm, Karai. The teenager called Leo thought as he lay back on his bed, crossing his arms behind his head. She is such a mystery. But would I, could I leave Splinter if he did something evil? Yes. I could never go along with someone who intended to harm innocents, even my own father. So why does she? I know she's not evil, and I even believe she is honorable, so why does she follow the Shredder? There must be something else, something I don't know. I do think I'm starting to get to her, though. Every time we meet she seems less loyal to him. And she even said "thank you" last time. Leo couldn't help smiling at the memory, glad his brothers couldn't read his thoughts. That just shows how much he knew.

In the main room of the lair his brothers were on the very same issue. Leo hadn't hidden his feelings quite as well as he thought. After their last encounter with Karai, Leo was in such a happy stupor the entire way home that every once in a while one of his brothers caught a dopey grin on his face.

"That boy's got a crush," Don stated bluntly.

"And bad," Mikey agreed, but couldn't let Don get away without some teasing. "Although, I don't think certain turtles should talk."

"Excuse me, and what's that suppose to mean?" Don sputtered, blushing and glad it didn't show on his olive green skin.

"Oh nothing—cough—April!—cough. Just that he's not the only one," Mikey smirked.

"Yeah," Raph couldn't help smirking at Don as well, but continued. "But he is the only one who likes our enemy number one's little pet."

"Whew, imagine having to ask her father for permission," Mikey cracked.

"Not funny Mikey. You're losing your touch," Don said dryly.

"Never had much to begin with," Raph teased.

"But we're getting off topic," Don rolled his eyes. "Leo needs to get his head out of the clouds before he gets it chopped off. Karai can't be trusted." That got questioning looks from the other two.

"Since when do you have a problem with Karai? She's saved our butts lottsa times. Not to mention Beijing," Mikey pointed out.

"Yeah, I'm the one who won't let up on that issue, but even I know she's proven herself an ally," Raph admitted. "What's your problem with her?"

"Character insight," Don stated shortly.

"Uh huh. And what the shell's that suppose to mean?" Raph demanded, rolling his eyes. Mikey noticed a haunted look pass over Don's face. It scared him. What happened to Donny?

"Yo dude, what's up?" Mikey asked. "You look like someone died." Don flinched slightly, quite disturbing his brothers. Mikey put his hand on Don's shoulder. "Donny, what happened in your dimension?" He asked quietly, amazing Donwith his understanding.

"It was thirty years from now. You guys were old and split up after a fight over—" Don couldn't finish.

"Over what Donny?" Raph asked, too curious to notice just how upset his brother was. Don took a deep breath and continued.

"Splinter's death. Casey was dead too. It was such a bleak future. So horrible..." Don trailed off. Mikey and Raph just stared at him for a minute. Then, before Don continued Raph held up his hand.

"Wait. Leo needs to hear this," Raph said quietly, and then louder, "Leo!"

Leo snapped out of his reverie, always attentive to his brothers' needs, his response was automatic.

"Yeah?" he called back, slightly annoyed at Raph's tone.

"Don's telling us about where Ultimate Draco sent him and you outta hear it," Raph called back. Leo jumped up, gratified. Every once in a while Raph could be considerate and use his head at the same time.

"Thanks for waking me up; I do need to hear it," Leo acknowledged Raph before turning to Don and Mikey, who sat on the couch. Raph was on the floor so Leo gracefully lowered himself into a cross-legged position beside him. Don repeated what he had already told the others, earning a stunned look from Leo, and continued his story.

"I convinced you guys to go up against the Shredder again, but he had more of those Karai bots, and Karai herself," Don paused to let that sink in, glancing at Leo, whose face was unreadable.

"The bots separated us and surrounded Mikey. They, they killed him." The last part was said in barely a whisper. All eyes focused on Mikey, who looked decidedly uncomfortable, shifting restlessly.

"Dead huh, as in dead? Wow, um, that hadtta be, like, really hard for you," Mikey stuttered, rubbing the back of his neak and avoidingtheir eyes.

"You have no idea, but that isn't even all of it. The rest of us managed to down the rest of the bots, but Karai kept Leo busy," Leo gave him a sharp look that still held a trace of the horror that it had assumed after picturing Mikey's death. "She begged him to take us and go so she wouldn't have to do her "duty," but Leo told her to make a choice, and she did," Don stopped again.

"Which was?" Raph fairly exploded in his impatience. Alternate Mikey had already been written off; Raph needed to know what happened to his other brothers. Don frowned at him but continued.

"She stabbed Leo in the back, literally." All eyes darted from Don to Leo and back again faster that you could say "major angst."

"No... It wasn't Karai, Don. Not our Karai—" Leo began stubbornly, but Don interrupted him.

"You died Leo. She killed you, and when Raph saw and attacked her for it, she sliced him open as well. I had to watch him crawl to your body and die while calling out to you and trying to reach your hand," Don had tears in his eyes now. Leo winced and glanced towards Raph before his eyes flicked back to Don. "And that bitch had the audacity to look sad while she stood above your bodies. She may not want to hurt us, but she won't follow what she wants, only what he wants. There's no way we can trust her, ever, Leo." Don was near hysterics.

"Donny, calm down. It's ok; none of us are dead. That wasn't us you saw die. It wasn'tKarai who did it," Leo tried to reason with him, but Donny was showing some very un-Donny-esk stubborn behavior and wouldn't listen.

"No Leo, don't you get it! I don't even know what that was. Sure, it could've been an alternate dimension like Mikey went to, or it could've been a future that won't ever be. But it could also be a future that will be if events continue to unfold as they are!" As horrified by the idea of his brothers' deaths as he had been, Raph was still able to roll his eyes at Don's melodramatic outburst.

"Donny, you sound just like Doc in Back to the Future," Mikey said, earning a very annoyed look from Don. But Don realized that Mikey had provided him with a good example, one that his brothers would understand.

"Yes, exactly! In Part III either Marty or Doc was destined to die, depending on the choices they would make. If Marty had continued on the path he started, Tannon would've killed him. It was only after he chose a different approach that he succeeded and they got outta there," Don burst out in his excitement. Leo may have missed the beginning of this conversation, but he could tell what the real catalyst was.

"This isn't about your bad experience, is it Don? You aren't looking for reassurance orcomfort or whatever; this is about Karai. You're telling me to stay away from her cause she's not to be trusted," Leo said coolly. Don looked himstraight in the eye before answering.

"Yeah. Yeah Leo, that's precisely what I'm saying. That may not be what actually happens, but it shows her character. She's never going to leave the Shredder."

"You're wrong Don," Leo said quietly. Don shook his head, turned on his heal, disgusted, and retreated to his lab. Mikey opened his mouth to say something, saw the look on Leo's face, and thought better of it. He followed Don out. Raph wasn't so discreet. He watched them go with sagged shoulders before turning back to Leo.

"Ya know Leo, Donny's got a point," he began, but Leo interrupted.

"What point Raph? You've always thought she was a traitor, and she's never given us any reason to think it," Leo said quietly.

"Except she still works for Shred-Head. And you gotta admit this future Karai didn't exactly prove me wrong. I mean, God Leo, she stabbed you in the back! Don't you think there's a sign in there somewhere?" Raph asked. Leo could see that the image really bothered Raph, and in truth he was sure that this would show up in his nightmares. A small part of him wanted to hug Raph for how his alternate self acted and died, but his pride squashed that thought. He knew the others were just trying to protect him, but he wasn't use to having their roles switched. Leo sighed, clapping a hand on Raph's shoulder, suddenly tired.

"I don't know Raph. I just don't know."

---

Leo was a born leader, so he couldn't just ignore the opinions of his brothers, but he really didn't want to consider them. His thoughts switched from one side to the other.

How could she stab me in the back and then kill Raph too?

No. It wasn't really her. Just like the Splinter in Mikey's dimension wasn't our Sensei. I notice no one mentioned him. I should've brought that up.

But Donny's got a point. It could've been a possible future Karai, meaning that could be how she feels.

Well then, I've just got to give her a reason to feel otherwise. Obviously I didn't do the right thing in that timeline. I've got to get her away from the Shredder.

But I can't put my bros in danger.

Yeah, but if I don't get Karai on our side then it might actually happen.

Man I'm going crazy; I'm arguing with myself.

No you're not.

Uh, yeah I am.

Ha ha, very funny Leo.

Oookay, this is getting weird.

Yeah, enough said, or thought, or, whatever. Man, I've got to retire. How the shell can I have a life when all I care about is keeping them safe? And why do we keep attacking the Foot?

So Splinter can have revenge for Master Yoshi, duh. This whole thing is about revenge. There's no honor in that. I'm just leading my bros into danger so that dear old dad can feel vindicated.

What's up with me today? I sound like Raph... Shell, he died trying to hold my hand? And at Karai's hand? What the shell am I going to do about all of this!

It took a whole lot of meditation before Leo managed to quiet his racing mind and get to sleep. Once he did, however, his sleep was disturbed with images of thousand of Karais killing his brothers. Again and again he watched them die, tossing and turning in his bed. He whimpered pitifully and called out for them in his sleep. But no one heard to wake and rescue him from the nightmares.

Don didn't even want to sleep for fear he would dream about the future...again. And of course, once his eyelids became too heavy and he surrendered, he slipped right back into that universe. Raph and Mikey were graced with nightmares of the same kind. Ah, the life of a teenage ninja...

---

They all stumbled into the kitchen with bloodshot eyes late the next morning. No one needed to say that they were all plagued with nightmares, and Mikey even gave them all a small hug before retreating to his seat. He just sat there, seemingly mesmerized by something in his cereal bowl. Splinter came in a few minutes later, looking shocked at how late they all slept in.

"Why aren't you practicing? Leonardo, what is this?" Splinter asked with obvious disapproval. Leo looked up from his bowl and narrowed his eyes.

"We aren't practicing because we just woke up after getting maybe four hours of bad sleep, and 'this' is breakfast," Leo said coldly, in a tone he never used with Splinter. It was a very hard night, and he was not in the mood to be the bearer of Splinter's weight.

"Well, hurry and finish. You need to perfect those katas we were working on earlier," Splinter said, not missing Leo's tone.

"Why? Is your revenge not complete? Pshhh, do it yourself. I'm tired of bearing all the weight cause you have a grudge," Leo said flatly while wondering how many back flips Splinter was going to give him.

What the shell am I saying?

The whole lair was dead silent, all eyes on Leo and Splinter. Mikey's spoon, halted halfway to his mouth, dripped milk unnoticed onto the table, while Don and Raph's lay forgotten. They had never, ever heard Leo talk to Splinter like that. But more than that, they had never thought of their training in that light. The sparkle of rebellion had already gone into Raph's eye as he processed what Leo was saying.

Leo's right! We're only ninjas to do his dirty work. Shredder never did anything to bother us. Splinter's master just happened to be a guardian. Raph thought.

"But my son, Shredder is evil. He threatens the entire planet and therefore must be stopped," Splinter sputtered. Leo opened his mouth to say something, closed it, and sighed instead. The chair scrapped noisily against the floor as he pushed it out, stood, and shoved it back in.

"Come on guys, let's practice." He seemed deflated. No one could meet either his or Splinters' eyes as they filed out.

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Note: I'd really appreciate it if you left a review letting me know how you liked it and any suggestions you have for further chapters or corrections to this one. Thanks!