Disclaimer: I don't own the characters herein. They belong to Marvel and all of their respective owners.
NATASHA and CLINT'S DAY OFF
So what do two of Earth's Mightiest Heroes do on their day off? Let's find out.
Natasha lounged on the couch at Avengers Tower reading a book on the latest curly hairstyles for women with type 3 locks. When Clint asked, she claimed that the knowledge would be useful for hunting down her next client. Clint Barton sat next to Natasha playing a video game. Both of them had been at this for a while.
Natasha got up to fix a plate of seasoned potatoes in the kitchen. She returned and set the plate down on the low table by the couch. Natasha realized that she wanted a drink to go with the food. So she went back to grab a glass of iced tea. When Natasha came back, a potato was missing. She glared at Clint. Clint kept playing, oblivious.
"Did you touch my food, Clint?" She said.
Clint instinctively wiped his cheek.
"No," he said.
Natasha took the plate and waved it under his nose. She saw traces of spice on his lip. Clint tried not to breathe in the delicious.
"Yes," he said lamely.
Natasha set the plate down with a CLACK. Clint flinched, but kept playing.
"Clint you can't just take people's food without asking!" She snapped.
"But I was hungry! You didn't ask me if I wanted any when you got up!" He whined.
Natasha's jaw dropped. He did NOT just pull a dick move. She stood in front of the TV. Clint dodged around her to see. She moved again. Clint moved. Natasha moved.
"Agh! Natasha I can't see what I'm doing!" Clint said.
"Oh I'm sorry, was that RUDE?" Natasha said.
Clint's character on screen died. He tossed the controller down, incredulous. Natasha sat back down next to him and crossed her legs. She took a bite of her potatoes.
"You know what? I didn't want to beat that level anyway. I'll just find something else to do," Clint replied.
He got up and walked to the far side of the room where he set his bow and arrows for the day. Clint picked them up and requested a target poster for practice from Jarvis the computer.
Natasha picked up her book and stretched her legs across the couch. She went for another bite of potato, when all of a sudden- PLUNCK!
The plate of potatoes that was in her hand now had a purple arrow in the middle of it. She slowly turned her stunned, furious gaze toward Clint. Clint had his bow up, fighting a smile.
"Heh heh," Clint giggled. That did it.
"You just messed up," Natasha seethed.
Natasha vaulted over the couch like a cheetah and pounced on Clint. Clint rolled around the floor with her, yelling and laughing. She kept punching him and Clint avoided as many hits as possible.
The door slid open. Tony Stark, Bruce Banner, Captain America, and Thor stepped in to find the two agents from SHIELD in a compromising position, fighting like two-year-olds.
"Um," Bruce mumbled.
"What," said the Captain.
"Should we not leave them?" Thor asked, confused.
"Jarvis take a picture," Tony said with a mischievous smirk.
"That's called blackmail, sir," the computer voice quipped.
Clint and Natasha scrambled apart and straightened their appearance.
"We were just having fun guys," Clint said.
Natasha punched him in the stomach. He doubled over on the floor. She grabbed her plate of food and removed the arrow. The men made way as she passed with the plate of food, speechless. A moment later, she came back for the book.
"If anybody else wants to have fun with me, DON'T," she said.
The guys lifted their hands in surrender because look out she's a badass, and she ain't playing around. There were no arguments from any of the other heroes on that.
- the end.