I'd Cry Only For You

Part 1

Hayley shuddered as the tears escaped, pattering like rain down her soft reddened face.

She wasn't supposed to cry.

"Stop it." She had told herself harshly and repeated the instruction several times.

She had tried with all her might to hold it all inside, to keep the horrid feelings swimming so vigorously, under some sort of control. However the guilt, the self hate and pain..it eventually had all become too much.

"You've gone and done it again haven't you Hayley." Her conscience muttered.

"Messed it up just like you do." It hissed.

"The one person you could depend on." It sneered at her.

Hayley's heart swelled up like a balloon, gradually feeling too heavy in her chest.

Her breathing wavered as she caught each breath with difficulty, still in the hope of reversing the effect.

A tear fell hurtling down her cheek with speed.

Several more pitter pattered on the tinned food she was mechanically stacking and her thumbs fumbled as a simple task became more and more difficult.

One hit her hand now, another the table.

"Pull yourself together Hayley!" She screamed at herself inside but it was no use.

She attempted to wipe the tears away but failed horribly. Her hands were shaking.

She couldn't stop it now. She couldn't.

The rate of tears grew as she herself grew more and more helpless.

Her heart thudded off beat in her chest and she could feels it's clench now, the lump in her throat growing simultaneously.

She was losing control.

Soon the feelings wrapped around her tightly and began to suffocate her as her body shuddered with each sob.

"Hayley?" A concerned voice then called her name from behind her. It's tone questioning, surprised even.

Hayley's pulse quickened as a wave of anxiety washed over her.

"Who is it?" She thought, her mind terribly confused. She didn't feel capable of seeing anyone at the moment. She felt as if she'd melt any second.

A fear ruptured through her as she realised there was no escape.

And so despite all, using the back of her trembling hand to wipe away her tears roughly and taking a few short breaths and sighs to recover she did best to prepare herself.

Hayley then coughed to dislodge the emotional lump in her throat and finally spun around.

...