Just a little drabble that I wrote when I was supposed to be revising~
It's set in an AU universe where the Death Note never landed in the human world- and Mello and Matt are just some couple who live in an apartment together. They refer to each other as Mihael and Mail rather than Mello and Matt, so just letting you know now so it doesn't cause any confusion ^^;
Contains: Angst, cheating, boyxboy and all that good stuff. Sex is confirmed to have happened, but there are no lemons because I didn't think it was necessary.
Pairings include: MelloxMatt, Strongly implied!MelloxNear and Implied!GevannixNear
The title of this fic was...ehem...'liberated' from The Spill Canvas song of the same name.
However, this is NOT a song fic. (If you've never listened to The Spill Canvas, go listen to them now. They are amazing)
DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN DEATH NOTE OR ANY OF ITS CHARACTERS.
Mihael tiptoed as quietly as he could through the vacant sitting area of his one-bedroom apartment. His heart was still pounding deep in his chest, and his blonde hair was slicked back into a messy ponytail. His blue gaze traveled across the room, with no clear path or direction, as he swallowed back the growing feeling of guilt that had formed a lump in his throat. He sighed, as he slowly passed the kitchen, and placed his keys gently to the chipped marble counter-top.
It didn't matter how many times he did this.
He always came back feeling ashamed and sick.
With a swift opening of a wooden door, and the squeaking of boots against porcelain tiles, Mihael had safely secluded himself in the confines of the apartments bathroom. He stripped himself almost immediately, discarding the clothes that clung to him with that familiar layer of detestable sweat. He brought a hand to his face- knowing that he must smell of that distinct, unmistakable scent of sex. He began filling the basin with lukewarm water, not daring to use the shower out of fear of waking him.
Water splashed clumsily against his face- before hands began running cleansing trickles all over his slender, muscled frame. He dared not to look at himself in the mirror, too disgusted to see the broken excuse for a man who stared back at him every time he did so.
When he'd finished, he reached out to grab a towel, and began to pat dry his now-shaking body. His eye lids felt heavy with growing exhaustion, as his mind reflected back to the nights earlier act of scheduled infidelity.
Why did he keep doing this?
When his hands had run across exposed white chest, his mind had kept screaming for him to stop. As large eyes look at him and fluttered open and shut, every rational though was pleading him to run way. As a quiet, raspy voice whispered his name- and sent tingles down his course of his spine- his conscience begged for him to end this.
But he didn't- because he was Mihael.
And Mihael never ever listened.
Their lips met in a soft and forbidden union- and all logical thought quickly deserted him. He relished in the sensations he was feeling, as his hands traveled up to sink into a shock of soft, white hair. Teeth clashed and tongues met; as Michael's passions soon became inflamed, and quickly overwhelmed him.
When it was over, there was no talk of love or commitment. The boy, who so easily stirred his desires, belonged to someone else in the same way he did. A tall, raven haired businessman- fearlessly dedicated to his beloved and cherished partner, but often away on conferences.
Mihael gave him the sexual release that he needed, and he in turn made Mihael's life just that little bit more exciting and dangerous.
Sometimes, he told himself that was the reason he did this.
Honestly though, he didn't know.
Having slipped on a pair of clean boxer shorts, Mihael crept slowly into the bedroom, where his lover lay soundly and sweetly asleep. After taking in the sight for a moment or two, his stomach sinking slowly with pained remorse, he slid slowly and wordlessly into the bed, praying he did not wake him up. Silky red hair tickled his face, as his exposed upper body met with the warmth of the others motionless, sleeping form. Delicately, he wrapped his arms around the gamers slender waist, before resting his head ever-so-gently against the crook of his pulsing neck.
He lay there for a moment, saying nothing- before the words escaped the confines of his tightly-shut mouth.
"Goodnight, Mail...I love you so much"
Slumber claimed Mihael almost instantly, his once-shallow breath coming out in long and heavy sighs.
Unbeknownst to the blonde who slept beside him, Mail lay awake in the darkened silence. His body shook with the suppression of loud, heavy sobs; as tears streamed down from his once joy-filled eyes.