The Darkness of Love
The Exile, the Scoundrel and the Dark Lord

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Chapter 1
Once Upon a Time

As silently as she could, Saleena slowly walked into the hallway that led to the cockpit. Once there, she would finally face Atton and talk over what happened in those last few days, whether he was ready or not. Her mind was brewing with so much to say since they haven't spoken for three days. She and Atton were always together whether in battle or for a friendly-yet-sometimes-naughty game of Pazaak. Now, they were simply avoiding each other. Saleena had started bringing the Disciple for missions instead of Atton, whose growing jealousy was not unnoticed by the young exile, and he would usually lock himself in the cockpit all day long, like some sort of hermit. She deeply missed his company but she was still angry and sad since she finally learned Atton's dark past in the refugee sector of Nar Shadaa from a stranger.

Saleena and Atton's next confrontation was now approaching and she did not want him to know she was coming, in case he would run away or start babbling uncontrollably in order to defend himself once again. She just wanted to barge into the small room and get everything off her chest before he could talk first.

"Are you looking for me?"

Saleena jumped and swiftly turned around to see Atton standing behind her, holding a cup of caffa while staring absent-mindedly on the floor, clearly avoiding eye contact. He was obviously still bothered by their last fight as well.

"Atton! You scared me!" Saleena breathed. "Yes…I needed to speak with you. It's about our last conversation…" She had no idea how to bring the subject up again. Oh do you remember when I found out by someone else you were a Jedi killer? This obviously wasn't the way to go.

Atton nodded nervously and simply kept his eyes on the floor, trying not to meet her gaze.

Saleena quickly felt Mira's presence, and it seemed that the bounty hunter was not minding her own business.

"We should go to the cockpit where we can talk without being…overheard." Saleena spoke the last word louder so Mira could get the hint. The red-haired woman burst out of her hiding place with a guilty look on her face. She mumbled something about checking on the hyperdrive, and walked off at a quick pace, not looking back. As for Atton, she was unsure if he could actually hear her.

Saleena turned around and slowly continued her path to the cockpit, relieved to hear Atton's footsteps following her own. She sat in the co-pilot's seat, and saw Atton closing the door and sitting beside her. He was still not looking at her, and it started to annoy her.

She finally decided of a way to get his attention. "I'm sorry." she simply said. The tactic was successful. This was clearly unexpected to Atton whose eyes darted to her own.

"Sal, don't be silly! You have nothing to be sorry about!" As she predicted, he started to babble. "I'm the one who lied about my past and I understand if you were to hate me forever but-

"Stop!" She blurted out. "You need to listen to me carefully. You did nothing wrong-

"What! You trusted me and I deceived you. You never thought that-

"Atton! Let me explain myself!" she said, an impatient tone in her voice.

He opened his mouth but closed it just as fast.

"When we decided to be…erm…together…" She could feel her face reddening of embarrassment as Atton's lips started to form a smile. We are a couple…in love! Is that so hard to say? "you warned me that you kept a dark past hidden that you didn't feel ready to share with me just yet but that you would be when the time would come, and I was okay with that. It's just that hearing it from a complete stranger made me go berserk but for this part, it is not your fault because I know you would have told me eventually. As for your past about your…erm… previous hobbies,"Again, she felt like a complete idiot and Atton's smile faded instantly."that definitely shocked me because I would never have expected such things coming from you. But that was a long time ago, and I know that you are not that kind of person anymore. I'm a Jedi and you have always stuck with me since Peragus, and you know how much that means to me." She felt her tone of voice becoming softer as she went on. "More importantly…you love me. The old Atton would never feel that way for a Jedi." They noticed they were both blushing and couldn't suppress a smile. "Atton, I forgive you, and I truly believe that the Jedi woman was right: You are force sensitive, and if you want to, I can train you to become a Jedi."

Atton just sat there gazing at her for a moment, a sparkle in his eyes. She is just full of surprises! Boy I love that woman! he thought, relieved. "I will be honoured to be your Padawan." After a short moment of silence, Atton asked tentatively: "Are we done talking here? We really do need to make up for loss time, if you know what I mean!"

"No! I'm not done…please let me finish!" Saleena said, snapping out of a fantasy involving Atton and an empty, lockable, and soundproof dormitory. She was now looking determined yet again. "I said I was sorry earlier because I was horrified by your past and I reacted rashly but I hid things from you too so I had no right to judge you like I did-

Atton suddenly cut her off unwillingly. "You fought the war, Sal. People had to be killed. That's what people do in wars…what you did is clearly understandable. I was in the war too except I tortured people, innocent Jedi, and I took pleasure into killing them...taking my time until I was satisfied."

"Atton…" Her voice trailed off and the mood in the room became once more awkward. He sensed some sort of desperation coming from her. It was now her turn to avoid his gaze. She decided to proceed with caution and take her time. "You don't know everything about my past. There are some things that I have kept to myself…that I never told anyone. Now, I want to tell you my past…why I was exiled…the real reason. It had to do with…" She struggled to say her next word. It's just a name. A five-letter word…that ruined my life. "It had to do with…Revan."

Atton gulped at the sound of the name coming from her quivering lips. He could see the name brought her more misery than any other person he had met who were fearing Revan as a Dark Lord of the Sith bringing death and destruction to many worlds. For Saleena's case, it seemed more…personal, and that scared him even more.

Saleena went on, afraid of the silence in which they were in. "I knew him really well and we were once…in love." Her last words were a whisper and she wished Atton didn't hear the last part. She realized she was going too fast. She planned to say things in a certain order but now all her thoughts were mixed up.

Atton's eyes were quickly reflecting worry as he looked away from Saleena and stared down at his feet, thinking. I should wash my boots…when I'll have time. They're really dirty. Is that spot Bantha poo? What am I saying? Saleena dated Revan! I am dating Revan's ex-girlfriend! What the hell did I get myself into? He turned to her again and his features softened with a simple glance at the face of the woman he would willingly die for. Her angelic face, sometimes misleading, was matching her gorgeous green eyes that were showing nothing but sadness and regret, which made his heart ache with guilt. She's about to open herself up for the very first time because she trusts me, and I'm just over-reacting because I'm insecure…who's the better lover? Revan or me? Who cares? Right? Anyway…she needs me right now…as much as I need her! Boy I really do love that woman! "Okay. You can tell me everything. I'm listening and I promise to keep my mouth shut."

He forced a smile and looked tenderly into her eyes but with a hint of fear and humour that made her cringe at the very thought of telling him everything about her and Revan. She did not want him to judge her harshly nor did she want to hurt him at all. Atton was sincere and she loved him so much right now because of it.

Saleena smiled weakly in return. She was definitely glad for his cooperation and attention. She took a deep breath before starting her story…the story she desperately tried to forget, and that almost felt like an old nightmare revisiting her one last time. Maybe after she will finally be free from the memories that haunted her for far too long…her memories of Revan, the man she once loved too much for her own good…the man who broke her apart and led her to the dark side, even though for a brief time but still, he was the first to give her a taste of it. This was the story of a forbidden love between two Jedi who took a risk by believing love could conquer all, only to get scarred and separated. Definitely not the typical love story, she thought sarcastically. Pulling herself together, she began her story.

"It all started…"

Author's Notes: This is my way of introducing the story of Saleena and Revan. If in two weeks I get at least 10 good reviews, I will go on! Anyway…I hope you enjoyed it! I had this story brewing in my mind for so long so I had to write it down…finally! I do hope you will want more! Please review! Flames are acceptable but come on…it's my first fanfic so please don't be too harsh but be honest as well so I can improve as a writer!