The Doe and the Stag
This is a Lilly/James one-shot based off a Tumblr post. Original post has been added at the end, because I didn't want to spoil the story by putting it at the beginning.
Plot idea is not my own, neither are the characters or anything else recognizable from Harry Potter.
As a side note, I couldn't find who the canon DADA teacher was during the time period, so she's a made up character, but if anyone knows the actual professor for Lily and James somehow, that would be great to know.
The classroom was filled with students, as any classroom should be during school hours, waving around their wands in attempts to cast one of the most difficult spells that they "would learn this year, and quite possibly one of the hardest enchantments they'd ever learn in their wizarding career," in Professor Timms' exact words.
After her lecture on the Patronus Charm, she had given her students the basics about the charm along with a few tips and words of encouragement. "It is much more difficult," she said moments before turning the students loose to let them practice, "than you think it is, to not only summon up a happy memory, but a strong one at that. And even after you've done so, it's very rare for a wizard to produce a corporeal Patronus the very first time. I see the way you're all looking at me," she added, a smile gracing her elfin features as she looked around at the way her class moved about restlessly, their fingers already inching towards their wands. "Just don't be discouraged if all you manage today is a few wisps of silvery smoke. At the end of the lesson, I'll call each of you up one by one, and we'll see what progress you've all made! Well, no use waiting sitting about anymore. Off you go, now!"
And now the students had been practicing for almost the entire portion of the practical part of the class as Timms walked around offering advice and criticism, the violet robes she was wearing swishing about her body like her own personal purple cloud.
The air in the room shimmered with a considerable amount of silvery light, which twinkled like a veil of snow, glowing with magic and happiness. Of the students, only one had managed to produce a corporeal Patronus, an owl that had taken flight briefly before vanishing again as the student who'd produced it lost concentration.
With only one success, the students, by now, were getting more than a bit frustrated.
To James, Remus, Sirius, and Peter – who probably shouldn't have been laughing, because Peter too was unable to produce his own Patronus – it was utterly amusing to see the annoyed and upset faces on their fellow classmate's faces.
"Is it really that difficult to produce a Patronus?" Sirius whined. "This class is a complete waste of my time! I've got so many better things to be doing!"
"Like what? Snogging another girl in a broom closet?" James sneered.
"That happened only once!" Sirius protested. "Or twice. Okay, maybe at least a dozen times?"
"That's an under-exaggeration," Remus said. "Besides, it's not easy to produce a Patronus Charm."
"But we can do it!" Sirius whined.
"That's because we've been practicing before," Remus pointed out, referring to the nights they'd spent practicing not only the Patronus Charm, but also countless other spells, curses, jinxes, and hexes that were much more advanced than the ones sixth year course taught.
"Really? I don't need practice," James bragged airily. "Everything just comes naturally to me."
"Your humbleness and modesty included," Remus said blandly, earning a "Hey!" from James and a laugh from Sirius. Peter too tried to show his amusement, his giggle coming out high-pitched and forced.
"You sound like a rat even when you're not in animagus form!" Sirius guffawed. Peter's cheeks tinged pink but otherwise, he didn't react to Sirius's words.
"Shh! You can't talk about that so loudly in public," Remus reprimanded, looking around them at the students and the silver mist in concern. "What if someone overhears us?"
"Like anyone would take what we're saying seriously," James snorted.
"That's not a good thing, James."
"Look! Even the amazing Evans is having difficulty producing a Patronus," Sirius said suddenly, changing the course of their conversation and indicating the redhead girl who was located across the room, standing amongst her other friends.
As the boys watched her, the girl prepared to try her hand once more at the charm. Raising her wand, she said, with a determined look in those green eyes that glimmered in nonexistent sunshine, "Expecto Patronum!"
Come on, Lily, James thought, urging her on silently and willing a fully formed Patronus to blossom from her wand. If only he could supply her some of his own happiness, gleaned from just watching her (Cut it out with the sappy thoughts, James!) But just as Sirius had remarked, she was struggling; the only evidence of her words were a few thin wisps of silvery clouds that quickly evaporated along with Lily's patience. Even the smartest witch in the class was unable to produce a corporeal Patronus.
"You'd think she'd have the easiest time making a patronus," Sirius said.
"What do you mean?" asked his bespectacled friend.
"Well, with you around her all the time making her life a joy, she's got plenty of happy memories to choose from."
Both Remus and Peter suppressed a snort of laughter as James realized that Sirius was making fun of him.
"Shut up! At least I remain loyal to one girl, while you go around snogging the whole of the Hogwart's population – female and male for all we know!"
"That's a lie," Sirius said, pouting. "For one, I haven't kissed you or Peter. And Evan's is just as impossible for me to catch as she is for you – which is saying a lot."
"Shut up!" James shouted again. This time, a few spells sputtered out as students turned to look at the Marauders, wondering what on earth was happening among the friends, and possibly hoping to witness an amusing exchange.
Now Professor Timms swept in. "Boys, boys, what's going on here? Why aren't you practicing the Patronus Charm like all the other students?"
"We're already able to do it, Professor." Remus was the first to reply, sounding respectful.
"Really," Timms said in a way that suggested that she was, in fact, very doubtful of these words. Her robes rustled as she crossed her arms, reminding James of a watered-down version of a disapproving Professor McGonagall. "Well, I am very pleased to hear that. I think the class would benefit from seeing a corporeal Patronus cast by a fellow student. Would the four of you mind going after everyone else?"
The boys grinned at each other.
"Of course!"
"Alrighty then," Timms said, a smile gracing her lips. Now she raised her voice, so that she might be heard by the whole class. "Students, practicing time is up for the day! Please, everyone take your seats now. I will begin calling students up one by one so we can see how well everyone did today. This will be for marks, but don't be disheartened if you can't produce anything more than a few silver clouds. I'll go easy on you."
There were a few reluctant groans, but everyone began to make their ways back to their seats.
"I'm not very good with the Patronus," Peter fretted to Remus. "What'm I going to do?"
"It'll be okay," his friend replied. "From what we've seen, none of the other students can produce a corporeal Patronus. Just like Professor Timms said, she'll go easy on you, and if you don't manage, nobody will be disappointed in you."
"Except me," Sirius butted in. "I'll be super disappointed."
"Not helping, Sirius."
"Shush now, class. Thank you." Professor Timms now stood at the very front of her classroom. "Excellent job, all of you. I congratulate you on the effort you put into this charm. It's not as easy as you thought, was it?" She paused for a moment, as if she wanted the students to agree that it was, indeed, much harder than it had originally seemed. Nobody said a word, so she pressed on before the silence became too evident. "Do I have any volunteers who'd like to go first to show the class how they're coming along? No? Ah, thank you, Mary."
One of Lily's friends, Mary MacDonald, stood up from her seat and headed to the front of the classroom. On her face was a look of regret at having volunteered first, but despite the obvious anxiety in her expression, she held up her wand, stood firmly, and said, "Expecto Patronum!" in a loud and clear voice.
A few wisps shot from her wand tip, silver and thin, before they evaporated into nothingness.
Professor Timms clapped wildly as Mary headed back to her seat, looking slightly pink in the face. "An excellent start, Miss MacDonald. Thank you for being brave enough to come up very first. I think you'll be on your way to a corporeal Patronus in no time. Do I have any more volunteers? No?"
The classroom fell into silence for a few seconds that seemed to last eternity, the length of their existence drawn out like paint spread out on a canvas. Professor Timms looked around at her students expectantly, and then when nobody spoke up, a look of disappointment came over her face and she opened her mouth to choose someone herself.
"I'll go, Professor," a voice interrupted.
Now James was sitting up straight in his seat as Lily Evans rose from hers and headed to the front of the classroom. Sirius smirked knowingly at his friend as he leaned towards him.
"Five Galleons says she doesn't produce a corporeal Patronus," he whispered in James' ear.
The other boy scowled at him. "Five Galleons says she does," he challenged.
"Ten Galleons says he Patronus is a dolphin."
"Why a dolphin?"
"Because they're really smart and cute, but they're actually pretty annoying."
"That's not true!" James protested loudly. Now the class was staring at him, and Lily was glaring rather hard too, perhaps thinking he was trying to sabotage her performance. He generally liked it when she looked at him; her eyes were the most beautiful treasures he'd ever seen, a shade of green so gorgeous that nothing could compare to them. And when she was angry, they would burn with an inner fire, glowing brighter than her hair when the sun kissed it with its light.
Now was not the time to think about that, even if he couldn't help thinking about her.
"Mister Potter, Mister Black, is there a problem back there?" Timms asked, her voice coated in more sugar than a Honeydukes' Sugar Quill.
"No, Professor," came the reply from the two boys.
"I didn't think so. Apologies, Miss Evans. Go on ahead and show us what you can do!"
With attention refocused back on the beautiful – pardon, redhead with nice features – at the front of the room (Oh Merlin, he sounded so sappy, and by trying not to sound sappy, he just sounded weird!), James whispered to Sirius, "Dolphins are definitely not annoying."
"Shh!" Timms hissed before Sirius could reply.
Lily's face was screwed up in concentration, achieving a color of red that almost matched her ginger locks, her shoulders tensing up, wand poised. Then she seemed to relax, though her face didn't lose its crimson hue, and she said, confidently, "Expecto Patronum!"
For a moment, nothing happened, and the classroom was utterly silent as the students waited for a few disappointing wisps of silvery light to escape the tip of her wand.
Instead, much to the surprise of everyone in the classroom, a beautiful, shining white doe blossomed from her wand, lighting up the classroom with its bright light, glowing even brighter as Lily's new happiness at having produces a corporeal Patronus fueled its magic. The other students had a mixture of expressions on their faces; Lily's friends looked delighted, others looked completely put out, and others looked angry that they hadn't been the first to produce a corporeal Patronus.
James, on the other hand, felt like he'd gone into some sort of shock.
A doe. Her Patronus is a doe.
That has to mean something.
Why was it a doe of all things? And mine's a stag. Doesn't this totally prove that we're destined to be together?
Cut it out with the sappy thoughts, James.
But still!
His friends appeared to be thinking along the same lines, because Sirius, Remus, and Peter all just stared at James with wide eyes, perhaps wondering what their bespectacled friend was thinking.
James just stared at the redheaded girl at the front of the classroom, who's face was glowing with delight and whose hair was glowing from the silvery light of the doe Patronus that now pranced about the classroom in an impossibly delicate way. And despite trying not to think sappy thoughts, his mind said, This is perfection.
Then the doe was gone and Timms was showering congratulations and compliments down on Lily while also telling the class just how utterly wonderful the redhead was, and Lily was heading back to her seat with a beaming smile on her face that was almost brighter than the doe Patronus she had just produced.
-.0
Lily couldn't remember the last time she'd felt so delighted. It had taken her most of the class period to find a memory that was perfectly suited for the job – seeing Hogwarts for the first time, silhouetted in the dark night sky, its windows glowing molten gold while around it the stars twinkled a contrasting silver – but the elation she felt when the doe burst from her wand had been worth her frustration.
I did it! I produced the first corporeal Patronus in our class, she thought, feeling triumphant. She now looked to James Potter, who looked as though he'd just seen the ghost of his mother. Bet you didn't think I could manage, did you? Thought you'd be better than me at this? I'd like to see you produce a corporeal Patronus yourself.
Other students were now going up to the front of the class, volunteering much more eagerly now than before. Perhaps seeing one of their fellow classmates produce a full Patronus had reinvigorated them. There were a few more close calls – the boy who'd produced the owl managed to get his Patronus to form again, and another boy named Alfred Pond startled everyone when a silver squid blossomed out of his wand like some bizarre flower.
Now Peter Pettigrew was at the front of the class. A rather plain and magically untalented boy, he was probably the Marauder that Lily could stand the most; Remus was smart, but too shy and she felt that he was always showing off his knowledge of the magical arts, Sirius was very annoying, shamelessly flirting with her and everyone else and also possessing an absolutely awful sense of humor, and James...well, he was James.
In a mousy voice, Peter said, "Expecto Patronum!" Lily wasn't expecting anything from him other than a few wisps of silver light, as had been the trend the entire day, so she was surprised when what appeared to be a rat flew from his wand and ran about the classroom for a few moments before vanishing.
Students clapped, and Professor Timms immediately began to shower Peter with compliments, something the boy blushed and reveled under. She sympathized with Peter, not understanding why he'd associated himself with the other boys. He must hate it, always under the shadows cast by James' and Sirius's big heads.
"Excellent, Peter, well done. Mister Potter, would you like to go next?"
Lily rolled her eyes, knowing that James would stand up immediately and confidently, swaggering his way to the front of the class where he would then make a big show about casting his Patronus. She sincerely hoped that nothing would happen when he said, "Expecto Patronum!" so that he would be left at the front of the classroom looking like even more of a fool than he already was.
So she was surprised when he instead stood up, looking shaken, and headed up to the front of the class, looking very much like he wanted to be going the opposite direction. When he got to his destination,he stood there for a full minute, staring at his friends.
This hesitance in the normally cocky Potter made Lily curious. Why wasn't he showing off and flaunting his skill to the class?
"We're waiting, Mister Potter," Professor Timms said, breaking the silence.
But James didn't react. Instead he continued to stare at his friends, and when Sirius made a gesture – go on, what are you waiting for? – he stopped staring at them and instead turned to look at her.
Lily, by this point in her Hogwarts career, was more than used to being the focus of James' attentions, so she immediately felt herself flaring up with annoyance when his gaze landed on her.
Why are you looking at me? Are you trying to make sure I'm watching you? she snapped mentally. Then an even worse possibility occurred to her. Oh wait, am I your happy memory or something? Merlin, that's almost worse than him just staring at me to stare at me. STOP LOOKING AT ME, JAMES POTTER.
"Mister Potter?" the Professor asked again, quietly. "Is everything alright?"
This time he reacted to her voice. "Yes, Professor. Sorry. But do you think it would be okay if I performed the spell for you, ah, in private?"
Timms gave him a reproachful look. "Very well, Mister Potter. Please come to my office after class. I'm a bit disappointed, though. I thought you said you could produce a corporeal Patronus?"
James cleared his throat, looking awkward. "I can, Professor. I'm just worried about what other people might think or…" now he glanced at Lily, "feel about it."
"Alright, sit back down then." Timms looked past Potter dismissively. "Mister Lupin, would you like to go next?"
As Remus and James switched spots, Lily's least favorite Marauder shot her another look.
Something wasn't right. Why hadn't James cast his Patronus for the class? If he was telling the truth (though she wouldn't put it past him to lie) and really could produce a corporeal Patronus, then why hadn't he showed off? The James she knew would've jumped at the opportunity, especially because Peter had also been able to produce a full Patronus.
Why wouldn't James-Perfect-Potter, who is always bending the rules and not listening to the teachers and making fun of other students, not want to show off in front of the class? What's he hiding, anyway?
When Timms dismissed the class a few minutes later, Lily got up along with her friends and packed her bag. They had lunch next, so there wouldn't be any harm and staying behind.
"You guys go on ahead," she told Mary, Marlene, and the others. "I'll catch up with you in a moment. I've got to talk to Professor Timms."
Once the rest of the class had disappeared off to lunch, she quietly snuck forward, towards Timms' office, making sure to keep quiet so that neither the professor nor James would realize that she was outside, watching.
"Care to explain the real reason you didn't want to cast the charm in front of the class?" Timms was saying when Lily got within hearing range. The professor, who was still decked out in her violet robes, was sitting behind her large desk.
"I've already told you the reason," James replied, and Lily, ever in the habit of criticizing his every move and word, found his response rather rude. "Professor."
Timms gestured grandly with her hand, seeming to overlook her student's tone of voice. "Go on, then. Show me you can actually produce a corporeal Patronus and you're not just show."
Yes, Potter, show us, Lily thought.
James took a breath, closing his eyes as if to recall a happy memory, and then barely a heartbeat later, reopened them and spoke confidently, "Expecto Patronum!"
Please don't let anything happen, Lily couldn't help but wish, but at the same time, she really, really wanted to know what Potter's Patronus was, and what in the name of Merlin had stopped him from casting it in front of the class. Maybe it was something really weird or embarrassing, like...a skunk or a warthog or something.
And for the nth time that day, Lily found herself so surprised when this wonderful, dignified silver stage exploded from his wand and gracefully cantered around the room, lit with a soft glow.
A stag. His Patronus is a stag.
Does that mean something? Oh no, what if it does?
Why was it a stag of all things? And mine's a doe. Oh Merlin, maybe that's what he was thinking – a doe and a stag are a pair. Oh Merlin. Oh Merlin, he probably thinks we're destined to be together now because of our Patronuses! Is that why he stood at the front of the class for so long?
But then, if he knew that my Patronus is a doe, and his is a stag, wouldn't that have been an even bigger reason to cast the charm in front of the class? Everyone knows that he likes me. By showing that our Patronuses are a pair, wouldn't that just be a chance to "prove" to the class that we really were going to end up together?
"I'm just worried about what other people might think or…feel about it," he'd said. That just made everything worse, because now she had to realize that perhaps James Potter was a decent being.
Not only were their Patronuses a pair, but James didn't want to push that fact onto her in front of everyone because he didn't want to embarrass her.
Damn it, James Potter, you really are the worst, she thought, storming from the classroom without really thinking about the noise she was making as she exited. You should've just cast the spell and humiliated me; I would thank you a lot more.
The most terrible part, though, she realized later, when she saw James and his friends in Transfiguration. When she'd figured out the reason he hadn't cast the charm in front of the class, her heart had been hammering loudly in her chest.
And now every time she saw his scrawny frame, the messy hair sticking up in all directions and the round glasses atop his nose, her heart started beating wildly again. Not only that, but she suddenly felt too warm and self-conscious, feelings she hated very, very much.
We are not a pair, she told herself. Our Patronuses mean absolutely nothing.
-.0
Author's Note: Thanks for reading and I hope it was enjoyable. Sorry if the plot was rushed/characters were bit OOC, I just find James and Lily to be rather difficult to write and Sirius's personality escapes my character portraying abilities. Sorry that Peter didn't say much, but maybe that's not much of a loss.
Should I do a second chapter, just to tie off a few loose ends? I did leave a few plot points that could be further pursued/explained. Also here's the Tumblr post that inspired this, thank you to the person with account username there-is-a-bluebird whoever you are (probably not reading this but still thanks anyway) if there were any lines from this Tumblr post that you recognized from the story they were not originally mine, they were from this person. Bolded words aren't mine. I think I've put way too many disclaimers but better safe than sorry.
I want like
Marauders learning how to cast Expecto Patronum in their fifth or sixth year all together as a class
and it's busy and hectic and chaotic and you can't see for silver mist everywhere and everything.
and the marauders are all just chilling at the back laughing because they mastered it easily, they already know what form happiness is going to take for them, they know their souls and they've had good times
until the professor has them all go up one by one and try to cast the spell in front on the class and some of them get mist but some get animals
and Lily screws up her face and goes all red and blossoms out this beautiful, shining white doe
and James' jaw just drops
and all the marauders are staring at him and he's staring at Lily and when it's his turn to go up he's all nervous and shakey and looks at her and he knows it would just humiliate her so he asks the professor if he can do his later
and Lily gets all curious and suspicious about James-Perfect-Potter who is always bending the rules and what is he hiding anyway so she stays behind and peeps through the classroom door
and James casts this wonderful, dignified silver stag that gracefully canters around the room, glowing softly, and the professor gives him full marks and lets him go
and Lily has her heart in her mouth and she realises thatnot only are their Patronuses a pair, but that James didn't want to push that fact onto her in front of everyone because he didn't want to embarrass her.