AN: How to Train your Dragon belongs to Dreamworks, Assassin's Creed to Ubisoft.
"What do mean, dragon?" Edward asked in an amused tone, leaning back in his chair. There was a cold breeze in the quaint Scottish village that night; good for a drink at the local pub. Across from him was a ragged fellow, auburn red hair and wild eyes blazing with an off-putting intensity. Something about him just seemed to scream 'Viking'. Perhaps it was the comically large-horned helmet and blue face paint that tipped him off.
"I mean what I mean! Not just one, no no no. Hundreds of them, thousands of them all across the Barbaric Archipelago! Why is that so crazy to imagine?" The barbarian asserted. Edward rolled his eye good-naturally. The lad talks like a pepper mill.
"And where, might I ask, is this famed Archipelago? I've been all over these waters and of the West Indies. Now, I like to think of myself as a worldly man. Yet, 'ave never heard of these so-called Barbaric Archipelago" Edward declared, smiling in challenge.
"Why, twelve days north of Hopeless and a few degrees south of Freezing to Death. Located solidly on the Meridian of Misery". Edward raised his eyebrows to this. Was he serious? The crazed man's smile widened at that, "You will call me Dagur the Deranged, the Cracker of Skulls, the Slayer of Beasts, the Great and the Fearsome!"
Edward sputtered out his beer, "Dagur the Deranged?"
"Ah, so you know of me!"
"Nay, just commenting on your name. Quite the title you have there, Dagur. Where did you get such a namesake?" Edward asked with morbid curiosity.
"Well, I am so glad you asked. It all started the day I was born", Dagur began dramatically. As he gladly began his rambling tale, Edward narrowed his eyes, focusing all of his senses on the Viking. Like a candle suddenly lit, Dagur's form lit a light blue hue, his surrounding fading around him. An ally, then? What did Kidd always say, that hues could still change due to his own perception? Edward had seen a lot of betrayals in his day; Dagur could do the same. Edward tried not to mull over this. Instead, refocusing on the conversation, Dagur had now reached his early adolescence: on becoming sole leader of a group called the 'Berserkers'.
"So, I said, 'Do I look stupid to you?!' and he was all like, 'Nooo, please don't kill me!' But then, I already had my birthday whacking-axe out, and it seemed a waste if I didn't!", Dagur laughed, a smug look on his face. "Oh, the laughs we had. My father, well…", Dagur paused, a dark expression crossing his face, "He didn't really like that. Didn't stop him from leaving me in charge though, the coward." Edward paused in his drink, noting Dagur's sudden change in demeanor. Still, he felt a pang of sympathy for the boy. Dagur couldn't be much older than Edward when he was forced to take the wheel of his fallen captain's ship. Of course, that had been a literal wreck, but nonetheless.
"I didn't get along with my father either", Edward said with a nonchalant air, "Both he and my mother disowned me, my father for being a trouble-maker, my mother in disappointment to the man I became."
"Like brothers from another mother", Dagur grinned wildly. Edward couldn't help but agree in that moment, until Dagur just had to add, "Well, more like uncle and nephew, you are pretty old."
Edward ignored him, contemplating a moment as Dagur let his joke sink in.
"At least you still have a father, alive and waiting for you", Edward sighed, prompting catching Dagur by surprise. "Yes, he disowned me, but I was only eighteen when I received the letter that he passed", he explained simply. Edward Dagur looked up like he could have made a joke, but stopped.
"I-I", Dagur opened his mouth and closed it, like a fish gulping in air
"Your father… Is he not well?"
"My father has been... 'retired'", Dagur said strangely," So that I may do something he was…incapable of doing. Return the Berserkers to their former wealth and glory." Edward felt a ghost of the past brush the back of his neck at that.
"But before that", Dagur's cold expression steeled with determination, "I have a vendetta to pay against those who wronged me."
"Wronged you? But you're as harmless as a fly", Edward smiled jokingly.
"Let me tell you a story about my traitorous brother, Hiccup Horrendous Haddock III and his cursed Night Fury…" Edward leaned back in his chair expectantly.
"When I first became leader of the Berserkers, it became my duty to renew our vows to the other tribe, the Hooligans, from Berk"
Edward raised an eyebrow and asked skeptically, "The Hooligans?"
Dagur rolled his eyes before continuing, "Yes, it's stupid, moving on. The Hooligans seemed great at first; we even attempted a communal hunt of a rogue Zippleback." Edward opened his mouth, but Dagur continued on, "Everything was great, which was exactly the problem. Hiccup, my ex-brother, ex-friend, turned out to be a complete traitor and secret-keeper, and there's nothing I hate more than traitors", Dagur seethed. Edward had to force himself to relax at Dagur's increasing tone.
"The whole town, it turns out, doesn't just not kill dragons, but trains the beasts, treats them like equals, and they were doing it behind the Berserkers' backs!" Dagur yelled. Realizing the uncomfortable expression on Edward's face, Dagur took a few heaving breaths.
Seeing the lull in the conversation, Edward asked, "What is the Night Fury?"
"Plasma-spitting dragon", the lad huffed, "They're supposed to be gone."
"Aren't all dragons supposed to be gone?"
He sighed, continuing, "Long-story-short, I teamed up with and became the chief of Outsider tribe. We try to do our own stuff behind the Hooligan's backs, and, guess what? They don't like secrets either. Anyway, even-longer-story-short, more betrayal from my own merged tribe. Some guy named Alvin the Treacherous from the Outsider tribe. Pssh. How obvious can you get?"
Edward let the Viking's voice wash over him as he considered the reality of Dagur's tale. Dragons, betrayal, hiccups. It sounds like something straight out of Don Quixote. But, if it were true… Dragons would be a game changer, no, a world changer. Especially, in the wrong hands. He had to find out if the rumors were true.
"So, Alvin and Hiccup, traitors to the very end, exile me and my few loyal men to three grueling years of imprisonment on Outcast Island. Luckily, a local trader passed by, allowing me and my crew passage from that cursed island. Not so luckily, a storm caught us and the cold current carried us days off course. Before we knew it, we had arrived in this strange place…", Dagur trailed off, seeming to notice his surroundings for the first time, "Which brings me to my next question; where am I?"
Edward pursed his lips. So, this Viking is the real deal, then? "Scotland", he simply said.
Dagur seemed genuinely confused by that. "Scotland?"
"Aye", Edward shuffled in his pockets, taking out his 1725 map of Europe and handing it over. Edward mulled over what had transpired while Dagur choked on air.
"Uncle, I think your map might be off", Dagur quietly mused, "You've only…like, five islands here. Are you sure you're not just little part of the Archipelago, perhaps a piece I've not explored yet? I see you have a Meridian of Misery"
"I'm not your uncle and yes, I'm sure", Edward distractedly said, "We call it the Prime Meridian and that map there is of the continent, bigger than you can imagine. Your islands are just probably tiny in comparison" Perhaps Dagur's Barbarian Archipelago is just an undiscovered string of islands? If the Meridian of Misery is a thing, then there is a likely chance that it'd be located on the Prime Meridian. Then, all we'd need is the Latitude and then…what?
"Much, much older brother", Dagur smirked before saying more seriously, "You seem to know quite a bit about these maps. So much so, I'm going to make you a deal."
"I'm only thirty-two", Edward sighed, swiping his map back and withdrawing his pen from his cloak, "You were saying?"
"If you navigate me back home, I'll get you a dragon to kill all by yourself. You'll have a blast!", the Viking warbled.
While tempting, Edward's thoughts went out to the Hooligans on Berk. He picked his next words carefully, "How about catching a live dragon?"
Dagur seemed to consider this. He looked Edward in the eyes, "I catch you a live dragon, you help me exact vengeance."
Edward, in turn, met his gaze with piercing clarity, "I'm not really one for picking sides, lad". Dagur visibly flinched at whatever he found in Edward's eyes.
"I never did get your name"